Medium Medium Rare Medium Rare Rare

[customersruinmylife]

I did a shift at the pub today just so I could earn a little cash. I have done four shifts at the pub in the past two weeks, but there has literally been nothing worth posting about...until today. Today I had the honor of working on the floor.

A lady called me over to her table. She was snooty from the moment she opened her mouth.

SC: Excuse me, but I asked for this steak medium rare, and it is far too well done. Can I have a fresh one?
Me: OK, I will just take it back to the kitchen, and we will sort something out.

Took it back and inspected the steak. It was a perfect medium rare. I eat my steaks medium rare and I saw right away there was nothing wrong with the steak. The cook flat out refused to make a new one, as there was nothing wrong with it. I took it back to her.

Me: I am sorry, but we have looked at this steak and have concluded that there is nothing wrong with it. You asked for a medium rare steak and that is what this is.
SC: No! No! No! It is not!
Me: It is far too bloody to be a medium steak. So if it is not medium rare then what is it?
SC: It is medium-medium rare!
Me: I'm sorry?
SC: It is inbetween medium rare and medium! So it is medium-medium rare! So that is far too well done! I like my steaks rare-medium-rare not medium-medium rare! So it is not medium rare!
Me: Our steaks are only cooked rare, medium rare, medium, medium well and well done. Nothing else. We do not offer them to be cooked rare-medium rare or any other variation.
SC: So what am I supposed to do?
Me: You can either eat that one or have a refund.
SC: Fine. I will keep this one. But I am not happy! How hard is it to cook a steak? Really? Do you have any idea what you are doing? If I knew it was going to be this much trouble I would have stayed at home and cooked myself!
Me: Well you know what to do in the future then.

I turned on my heel and walked away. I heard her mumble "Did he just say what I think he said?"

[Betweenshades]

Me: Well you know what to do in the future then.

Dr Pepper hurts when inhaled into the sinuses. Just so you know.

[Gravekeeper]

Me: Well you know what to do in the future then.

<snerk>

I was unaware there was such an intricately complex grading scale for the cooking state of a steak.

[SongsOfDragons]

Can I have her steak if she didn't want it? ^^

[Dave1982]

There is no compass-rose for steak doneness. None of this "rare-medium-rare" bullshit in the vein of "east-northeast." If there was, there would never be a happy customer.

[Jay 2K Winger]

Yes, this is steak cookery, not directional navigation.

[Bandit]

Me: I am sorry, but we have looked at this steak and have concluded that there is nothing wrong with it. You asked for a medium rare steak and that is what this is.
SC: No! No! No! It is not!
Me: It is far too bloody to be a medium steak. So if it is not medium rare then what is it?
SC: It is medium-medium rare!
Me: I'm sorry?
SC: It is in between medium rare and medium! So it is medium-medium rare! So that is far too well done! I like my steaks rare-medium-rare not medium-medium rare! So it is not medium rare!
Me: Our steaks are only cooked rare, medium rare, medium, medium well and well done. Nothing else. We do not offer them to be cooked rare-medium rare or any other variation.
SC: So what am I supposed to do?
Me: You can either eat that one or have a refund.

I'm sure I wasn't the only one who had Monty Python's SPAM sketch going through their head while reading this.

B

[Gravekeeper]

Yes, this is steak cookery, not directional navigation.

I perfer my steak medium by medium rare and cooked against a head wind of at least 15 knots.

[slavetotheman]

Me: Well you know what to do in the future then.

Bravo! Can't imagine what a satisfying feeling it must be to not to have to give a crap.

[telecom_goddess]

I perfer my steak medium by medium rare and cooked against a head wind of at least 15 knots.

But yeah that's getting a little bit too picky I'd like to see how the heck SHE manages to get it exactly the way she wants.

Personally I like a match waved over it.....

[thansal]

<snerk>

I was unaware there was such an intricately complex grading scale for the cooking state of a steak.

That's because there ISN'T

There is Rare, Medium Rare, Medium, Medium Well, and Deep Fried.

The difference between Medium and Medium rare is about 10 degrees, or about 2 mins per side. To be between those 2 you would be quibbling over about 5 degrees, and about 1 cm of brown vs bloody (assuming a normalish sized stake). WTF?

What she wanted was Rare to bitch.

[PatchO'Black]

I was going to say that, by now, you would think people would learn to expect that food at one restaurant may not match exactly with food from another, not to mention how they cook it themselves. Then I remembered that there are so many folks who are "aggressively ignorant", and not only don't know, but do everything in their power to avoid learning such things.

[chainedbarista]

SC: Fine. I will keep this one. But I am not happy! How hard is it to cook a steak? Really? Do you have any idea what you are doing? If I knew it was going to be this much trouble I would have stayed at home and cooked myself!

crml had, as usual, the perfect response to this idiot's ridiculous complaint.

thanks to you, bandit, i now have the spam sketch spooling through my head.

if she knew how to cook and is soo great at doing it, she should just stay at home and spare the world the drama.

[NateTheChops]

Deep Fried.

.

Only in Vermont and the Southern States. Other people look at us with disdain when we fry our steaks. Crazy.

[Marmalady]

There is Rare, Medium Rare, Medium, Medium Well, and Deep Fried.

There's Blue as well, which (as far as I can tell) is where you polish the cows horns, wipe its backside and chase it through a warm kitchen. Then serve.