puked on the carpet over by apparel:
I am told you're pregnant, and understand that having a bun in the oven can put your body through changes you don't like or understand, and one of those changes can be emptying the contents of your stomach in a violent and forceful manner.
However, when your morning sickness causes you to vomit your carrot-y salad onto our carpeted floor, please have the decency to seek out an employee to tell them about it. Actually, you didn't even need to do this, because one was nearby and heard you horking.
And then what did you do? Explain to her that everything's cool; you're preggers and suffer from morning sickness, and you just upchuck every now and then. And then continued shopping, perusing flip flops and purses. Classy.
Because this store's staff is 90% female, and every woman working was either unavoidably detained or too squicked out to clean up your mess, I got pulled off the truck to do it for you. I had to spend 45 minutes screwing around with a mop and some aerosol carpet cleaner, because we don't have a carpet shampooer and are thus rather unsuited to cleaning up liquid spills on carpet.
Oh, and I'm also told this isn't the first chuff-and-run you've pulled here. How about when you've delivered your baby and are back to work, I swing by and tell you "Oh, don't mind me, I have unpredictable, uncontrollable, projectile diarrhea, but it's cool. Uh oh, you might not want to stand too close to me right now..."
And as an added bonus, thank you to the HBA/Grocery specialist for copping an attitude with me when I wouldn't help you with a carryout when I was on my way out the door 10 minutes late to begin with. If it weren't for me, you'd be cleaning up that puddle of barf, fluttery stomach or not. Oh, and impugning my manhood when I told you no was an extra classy touch.
No love to the both of you, but much sincerity:
Irv
I am told you're pregnant, and understand that having a bun in the oven can put your body through changes you don't like or understand, and one of those changes can be emptying the contents of your stomach in a violent and forceful manner.
However, when your morning sickness causes you to vomit your carrot-y salad onto our carpeted floor, please have the decency to seek out an employee to tell them about it. Actually, you didn't even need to do this, because one was nearby and heard you horking.
And then what did you do? Explain to her that everything's cool; you're preggers and suffer from morning sickness, and you just upchuck every now and then. And then continued shopping, perusing flip flops and purses. Classy.
Because this store's staff is 90% female, and every woman working was either unavoidably detained or too squicked out to clean up your mess, I got pulled off the truck to do it for you. I had to spend 45 minutes screwing around with a mop and some aerosol carpet cleaner, because we don't have a carpet shampooer and are thus rather unsuited to cleaning up liquid spills on carpet.
Oh, and I'm also told this isn't the first chuff-and-run you've pulled here. How about when you've delivered your baby and are back to work, I swing by and tell you "Oh, don't mind me, I have unpredictable, uncontrollable, projectile diarrhea, but it's cool. Uh oh, you might not want to stand too close to me right now..."
And as an added bonus, thank you to the HBA/Grocery specialist for copping an attitude with me when I wouldn't help you with a carryout when I was on my way out the door 10 minutes late to begin with. If it weren't for me, you'd be cleaning up that puddle of barf, fluttery stomach or not. Oh, and impugning my manhood when I told you no was an extra classy touch.
No love to the both of you, but much sincerity:
Irv
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