Things That Will Not Teleport My Co-Worker Back to His Desk

[Dips]

I pick up the phone and you ask for Carl. I buzz him at his apartment in another state where he works. He isn't there so I get you back to tell you he's away from this desk and I'm going to put you through to his voice mail where you can leave a number so he call back as soon as he can.

Making any of the following statements, followed by an expectant pause, will not bring him back to his desk:

1. I'm calling from Colombia.

2. I talked to him earlier today.

3. But this is important.

4. He knows me.

Just to name a few examples.

He's not there, OK? I'm not lying to you. Access to Carl is equal opportunity. We don't give preference to people from Colombia, people who talked to him earlier today, people who think their call is important (which is EVERYONE) or people who know Carl (who is nearly everyone).

All you will get in response is, "I understand. Would you prefer to try again later or leave a voice mail message?"

After I've said THAT repeating any of the above preceded by a "BUT..." isn't going to teleport Carl back to his desk either.

He's not there. The choices are:

1. Leave a message.

2. Try again later.

3. Stop by his apartment, break in, smash down his bathroom door and physically drag him back to his desk.

We recommend 1. or 2.

[EricKei]

My old boss used to take most every non-marketing call we forwarded to him. As a result, when we told people he was out, he usually really was not even in the building. On the few occasions he was on DND, I often got tempted to tell people "Bossman said to tell you he's not here"...