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Moon Lawyer Logic
For future reference, when insisting that we've erred in towing your car from the customers-only parking lot of the local Starbucks 2 whole hours after they closed, you must play the "There weren't any signs" card BEFORE you play the "The signs didn't say I couldn't park overnight" card. Playing them in reverse order makes you look foolish.
Technically, playing the "I'm a lawyer!" card can be done at any time. But playing it after you've misplayed the crucial above-mentioned opening gambit only makes you look very very foolish indeed. And, if true, it also makes me weep for your future clients. As anyone trusting your argumentitive prowess will probably suffer the same fate that befell your car, namely ending up behind a locked gate topped by razor-wire.
In fact, that explains a lot. Methinks a lawyer, a COMPETENT lawyer could probably have afforded a better car than what looked to be a 95' Dodge Intrepid with some very large dents scattered about, an imprint down the entire passengers side that looked to be the perfect reverse-shape of a highway guardrail and a generous surplus of body corrosion... but hey, what do I know? I just know that those signs that don't exist apparently aren't clear enough.
Hey! GIMMIE BACK MY SOUL!
- Why'd you *BLEEPING* *BLEEPERS* take my car?!!
- You didn't have a permit to be in that lot
- *BLEEPING* ridiculous! There were 50 empty spaces in that lot! And I was only there to see a friend for a minute!
- Sorry Sir, but without a permit, you can't park there
- Whatever! I'm coming in to get it!
-Do you know where we're located? Or do you need directions?
-No! I know where you are! I already drove by and TOOK PICTURES! you'll be hearing from my lawyer! *CLICK!*
I really don't know where to go with that one.... So he took a picture of a brick building with a big fence around the back and some tow trucks in the parking lot .... what exactly was that supposta' accomplish? Must be one of those fiendish plans that just SOUNDED so good on paper that it just HAS to work....
Step 1. Get car towed
Step 2. Take pictures of garage
Step 3. Call Lawyer
Step 4. ?????
Step 5. PROFIT!
Still waiting to see what that crucial step 4 will entail....
It doesn't work like that
- I think my car was towed from 122 Some St, do you have it?
- I have a black Suburban from that location Sir, New Mexico plates?
- Yeah, that's mine, Uh, when did it get towed?
- 12:40am this morning, Sir
- Uh, but, isn't that too early?
- Excuse me?
- Well, I got a warning ticket yesterday afternoon at 5pm saying I didn't have a permit to be in that lot, and, well, doesn't that mean I get 24 hours before I can be towed?
- No, you can be towed anytime after the ticket, just depends on when the property owner decides to call us. Technically, they don't even have to warn you.
- So they don't have to give me 24 hours?
- No, Sir
- Oh... you take credit?
Well, give him some points folks, he's learning....
For future reference, when insisting that we've erred in towing your car from the customers-only parking lot of the local Starbucks 2 whole hours after they closed, you must play the "There weren't any signs" card BEFORE you play the "The signs didn't say I couldn't park overnight" card. Playing them in reverse order makes you look foolish.
Technically, playing the "I'm a lawyer!" card can be done at any time. But playing it after you've misplayed the crucial above-mentioned opening gambit only makes you look very very foolish indeed. And, if true, it also makes me weep for your future clients. As anyone trusting your argumentitive prowess will probably suffer the same fate that befell your car, namely ending up behind a locked gate topped by razor-wire.
In fact, that explains a lot. Methinks a lawyer, a COMPETENT lawyer could probably have afforded a better car than what looked to be a 95' Dodge Intrepid with some very large dents scattered about, an imprint down the entire passengers side that looked to be the perfect reverse-shape of a highway guardrail and a generous surplus of body corrosion... but hey, what do I know? I just know that those signs that don't exist apparently aren't clear enough.
Hey! GIMMIE BACK MY SOUL!
- Why'd you *BLEEPING* *BLEEPERS* take my car?!!
- You didn't have a permit to be in that lot
- *BLEEPING* ridiculous! There were 50 empty spaces in that lot! And I was only there to see a friend for a minute!
- Sorry Sir, but without a permit, you can't park there
- Whatever! I'm coming in to get it!
-Do you know where we're located? Or do you need directions?
-No! I know where you are! I already drove by and TOOK PICTURES! you'll be hearing from my lawyer! *CLICK!*
I really don't know where to go with that one.... So he took a picture of a brick building with a big fence around the back and some tow trucks in the parking lot .... what exactly was that supposta' accomplish? Must be one of those fiendish plans that just SOUNDED so good on paper that it just HAS to work....
Step 1. Get car towed
Step 2. Take pictures of garage
Step 3. Call Lawyer
Step 4. ?????
Step 5. PROFIT!
Still waiting to see what that crucial step 4 will entail....
It doesn't work like that
- I think my car was towed from 122 Some St, do you have it?
- I have a black Suburban from that location Sir, New Mexico plates?
- Yeah, that's mine, Uh, when did it get towed?
- 12:40am this morning, Sir
- Uh, but, isn't that too early?
- Excuse me?
- Well, I got a warning ticket yesterday afternoon at 5pm saying I didn't have a permit to be in that lot, and, well, doesn't that mean I get 24 hours before I can be towed?
- No, you can be towed anytime after the ticket, just depends on when the property owner decides to call us. Technically, they don't even have to warn you.
- So they don't have to give me 24 hours?
- No, Sir
- Oh... you take credit?
Well, give him some points folks, he's learning....
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