How to make ordering delivery food hard

[BeenThereDoneThat]

And as a former resident of the NYC metro area, I have to say I'd much rather get anything Tex-Mex from San Antonio than from Brooklyn Now, pizza, on the other hand...

[vikingchyk]

I haven't seen that commercial in years.

Thanks for the memories . . . that still is pretty dang funny.

+1

My husband and I still say "NYC?!?! Get a rope!" anytime anyone says "New York City"
{OK, mostly when we see it on TV - we try not to scare the mundanes }

[Jester]

Amusing side note to this thread: I just ordered delivery. I called the local Chinese place that we frequently call at 2:10. The order got to my door at 2:18. Yes, I live on a small island, but it takes at least half that time to drive from Chinese Place to my complex. Oh, I know that the stuff is already made and in steam tables (I don't delude myself into thinking they make it fresh), but it's nice when they get it here so promptly.

Probably because we tip very well.

Bonus round: I have no idea where you even got our number, lady, but San Francisco is 400 miles from here.

That's hilarious. And I can relate to it. On more than one occasion, when I worked at my old job at the Corporate Chain Restaurant here in Key West, I would get calls asking for directions....from people in the Miami/Fort Lauderdale area. Check googlemaps if you want to see the disparity in that. (Hint: it's 120 miles just to get to the mainland from her.) Either they didn't see the words "Key West" when they found the number or something, but invariably it was someone who thought it was a local restaurant.

When I was younger, one of the first things you learned was your address.

In my life, I have had at least 28 addresses. (Those are the ones I can think of off the top of my head. (Three I know of but don't remember, as they were the first 3 in my first 3 years of life.) That is not counting various friend's places I've crashed for various lengths of time. My point is, despite all my moves, I can always tell you where I live at that moment. Why? Because I am not a fucking moron.

Call to completely change the order from the ground up once the driver has already left the store. (Had this happen more than once.)The usual response to us telling them that it had already left was either "So what?" or "I'll tell him it's cancelled when he gets here", followed by a completely new order. Naturally, we were not permitted to charge them for the wasted FIRST order...

Complete and epic fail on management's part for this.

Me: ..... ..... ...... .... that's $25.74
Gives me $25.75....

Nice tip. Hope you didn't spend that penny all in one place.

*For our non-US readers (or even just younger ones), this is a reference to a commercial for picante sauce 15-20 years ago.

As for that whole "New York City" thing, I have to defend my home state of Arizona.

Arizona Iced Tea is made in NEW YORK.
Arizona Jeans Company products are made in CHICAGO.
Don't hold my beloved home state responsible for either of these suckass deceptively-named products.

(By the way, not that many people in Arizona actually DRINK that Arizona Iced Tea crap. Just saying.)

[EricKei]

That's hilarious. And I can relate to it. On more than one occasion, when I worked at my old job at the Corporate Chain Restaurant here in Key West, I would get calls asking for directions....from people in the Miami/Fort Lauderdale area.

Due to a MAJOR error in the printed flyers we sent out at the pizza joint a couple of months ago, we were getting pizza orders from callers in Memphis and L.A. ...and I live in the New Orleans area...x.x

Complete and epic fail on management's corporate's part for this.

Fixed that for ya.

I have NEVER worked in a delivery place that would make the customer pay for that wasted food, sadly. Why? Because it would be bad customer service, of course! They might not order from us again if we did that (so sad...) -- And it was ALWAYS company policy, too.

[draggar]

That's hilarious. And I can relate to it. On more than one occasion, when I worked at my old job at the Corporate Chain Restaurant here in Key West, I would get calls asking for directions....from people in the Miami/Fort Lauderdale area. Check googlemaps if you want to see the disparity in that. (Hint: it's 120 miles just to get to the mainland from her.) Either they didn't see the words "Key West" when they found the number or something, but invariably it was someone who thought it was a local restaurant.

OK, take Route 95, 75, or the turnpike as far south as they will go. If one ends at one of the others, take that south. At the very end, take route 1 south for about 2 hours (assuming little traffic)......

[Jester]

Fixed that for ya.

Corporate, management, whatever. Corporate is just upper management, really. In any case, the fail was on the part of the business and its idiotic policies, without question.

OK, take Route 95, 75, or the turnpike as far south as they will go. If one ends at one of the others, take that south. At the very end, take route 1 south for about 2 hours (assuming little traffic)......

Draggar, your directions are a bit off.

First of all, from I-75 and I-95, you'd have to get on the Turnpike. If you took 95 to its southern terminus, you would end up on US1, and driving that through Miami and the cities south of it would take you forever. I know, as I've done it. It sucks.

But even beyond that, once you get to the entrance to the Keys, it takes longer than 2 hours to get to Key West. Yeah, it's only 150 miles, but between the low speed limits (35-55, sometimes as high as 60) and the traffic and the fact that for the most part it's just one lane in each direction, there is no way you could do that in 2 hours unless you are flying and breaking some serious laws.

I drive like the wind, and my best time is 2:30 or so. See, the problem is that during the day time there is traffic, and at night time when there is no traffic, there are more cops and a lot of the speed limits, especially through the Key Deer Habitat, are lower. (And you don't want to speed through the Key Deer Habitat, are speeding tickets there are about $1,200 or so.)

Yeah, I've made that drive a few times....why do you ask?

[mharbourgirl]

Dude, that takes me back. I was once a driver/assistant manager at a little non-chain pizza shop. In a town next to a BIG military base. It is fun to waltz past the sign that says 'No Women Allowed' (or something like that) into the enlisted barracks with a delivery bag. After a few deliveries they got familiar with me and I started seeing a lot of naked and nearly naked male bodies who just HAPPENED to be coming out of the shower when the delivery arrived. Like I'm going to be shocked or noticeably impressed: I have younger brothers. I graciously failed to notice, and never complained to the MPs either. I got tipped GOOD.

Oh, and here's another one to add to the list:

Dear customer and his partner, it is ten kinds of WRONG to pull a Scott Thompson on the poor sheltered church kid on his second delivery to your house. He was 17 and I think you broke his brain. It took me the rest of the night to talk him out of quitting.

These guys were my favourite regulars, they tipped fantastically, but this got them a talking to from me, let me tell you.

[EricKei]

In any case, the fail was on the part of the business and its idiotic policies, without question.

Oh, absolutely. No argument there ^_^ Sadly, these are the customers they want to KEEP, rather than chase off with a broomstick...or boomstick...

[zombiequeen]

Just so you know, I thought of this thread when I was going to order breadsticks tonight...but then I didn't actually order them because I was nervous. It kind of sucks growing up in the middle of the woods when it comes to city stuff.

[BeenThereDoneThat]

Dude, that takes me back. I was once a driver/assistant manager at a little non-chain pizza shop. In a town next to a BIG military base. It is fun to waltz past the sign that says 'No Women Allowed' (or something like that) into the enlisted barracks with a delivery bag. After a few deliveries they got familiar with me and I started seeing a lot of naked and nearly naked male bodies who just HAPPENED to be coming out of the shower when the delivery arrived. Like I'm going to be shocked or noticeably impressed: I have younger brothers. I graciously failed to notice, and never complained to the MPs either. I got tipped GOOD.

When I delivered pizza/food I had to deliver to strip joints sometimes. I'm a straight female, so I was not impressed...and the strippers/staff didn't tip worth a shit. Then again...maybe I didn't want to touch that money...

[Racket_Man]

Oh, absolutely. No argument there ^_^ Sadly, these are the customers they want to KEEP, rather than chase off with a broomstick...or boomstick...

BROOMSTICK??????? why not just use something of substance like a wooden axe handle or a frozen salmon

[EricKei]

BROOMSTICK??????? why not just use something of substance

Because broomsticks are easier to conceal in plain sight...And heck, you can fit a slender spear blade or sword up one of those things if you know what yer doing...

[zombiequeen]

That and the bristles are NASTY.
I've been hit on the back with one of those big floor-sweeper brooms. If the person swinging it is strong, it's a fairly dangerous device.

[Jester]

...and the strippers/staff didn't tip worth a shit.

This actually surprises me, as in my experience, strippers are among the very best tippers, generally speaking.

[Jay 2K Winger]

This actually surprises me, as in my experience, strippers are among the very best tippers, generally speaking.

At the very least, they now how to handle the tip.