We don't have a "book"...Nice try

[Kisa]

I cannot tell you how many scammers tried to get free stuff by saying, "I'm in the book". We don't have a freaking book. We don't have a book and we haven't had a book in over 5 years. Unless you waited 8 years to come collect your free food, you are lying. They had this scenario all planned out and we have to stray from the script.

My Evil Plan
Take 1; Scene 1

Teh Hero: I want this this this and this. It's free because I'm in the book.
Lowly Employee: What is your name kind sir/madam?
TH: I am Smartie Pants!
LE: Hmm.... Well Mr/Mrs. Pants, your name isn't in the book.
TH: What?! I am very unhappy! I was told my name was written down! There must be a mistake!
LE: Oh, I am terribly sorry valued customer. We are but ignorant fast food workers and probably mispelled your name. Here, order whatever you want. It's on the house.
TH: Why thank you Lowly Employee!

TH walks off with over $20 of free food and LE is none the wiser.

End scene.


Here's where reality kicks in.

Story Changers

SC: Hi. I want 2 XXL chalupas and 2 Crunchwrap Supremes. I'm in the book.
Me: Ummm... what book?
SC: Y'know....
Me: Not really....
SC: The book that tells you I can get free stuff.

Oh HELL no!

Me: We don't have a book anything close to that.
SC: Oh, well the person said they wrote my name in the book because my order got messed up.

I asked them to pull to the window. They did.

Me: What exactly was wrong with your order?
SC: I was missing 2 crunchwraps and 2 XXL Chalupas.

Those are both big items that are near impossible to overlook so I doubted that we missed 4 BIG items on the same order without noticing. I noted that he had a buddy with him. My thought was him and his buddy were hungry and decided to scam Taco Bell out of some free stuff.

Me: Do you have your reciept with you?
SC: No.
Me: Do you remember who you talked to?
SC: Ummm.....It was some guy. He said his name was something or other.....
Me: Ok, well I need either a reciept or a name to do any replacement orders. Go home and find the reciept. Then I can help you.
SC: Oh, well my mom called and talked to the guy so I don't know his name.

So it went from "I called" to "my mom called". When construching a lie, keep in consistant.

Me: Well then call your mom and get a name for me.
SC: Well, she didn't call.
Me: Then who did?
SC: Nobody.

The plot thickens....

Me: Well then I'm sorry, but I can't help you.

He continued to argue with me, but a line was building up behind him so I asked him to leave because I had paying customers to take care of. Instead, he pulled up 10 feet and parked. Customers could reach the window, but everyone had to back up to get out. When asked to pull up more, he shut his car off.
Barbie was afraid to leave, but when she did, the idiot brothers yelled, "Where's my food?! They told me they would bring out my food!!", at her. Nothing like a good lie to prove your truthfulness.

After 20 minutes of that shit, Harmony went out to talk to them. They claimed they wanted to call, but didn't know the number. Our options came down to:
1) Give them the food
2) Call the cops
3) Let them wait it out

We didn't want to bother the cops and we didn't want any more pissed off customers so Harmony made and took them their food. Yes, it sucked but we wanted them gone. Harmony told me she took them their food, but didn't let them off easy. She took a piece of computer paper, wrote our number on it and taped it to his steering wheel.

Harmony: Now you can never forget what number to call
SC: Well...I um...we....errr.....

Calling out the Liars

SC: Hi, I had my order messed up and I get free food.
Me: Who did you speak with?
SC: I don't remember, but I'm Mary Swanson. I'm in the book.
Me: We don't have a book. Our rule is you have to have a reciept or a name to get your order replaced.
SC: Well then why did he tell me he wrote my name in the book?
Me: .....If "he" told you that, he was not supposed to. Our policy clearly states, "No reciept, No name, No replacements". You should have been told to keep the reciept and write the managers name on the reciept.
SC: That's such bull shit!
Manager: Mam, there is no need for such language. We are just following the rules.
SC: You people lied to me on purpose!
Manager: What was your order?
SC: A Grande Meal with 3 bean burritos, 4 soft tacos, 4 hard tacos, a nacho bellgrande, 3 cinnamon twists and an order of breadsticks.
Manager: And what was wrong with the order?
SC: It was cold.
Manager: And what were you told we would replace?
SC: All of it.
Manager: .......Mam.....that's almost $20 worth of food. I cannot replace that much food without a name or a reciept.
SC: That is such bull shit!
Manager: If I do this for you, I could lose my job. I will give you $5 worth of food now, or you can go home and try to find a reciept or a name to give me.
SC: F*ck this! *leaves*

Fake names never work

SC: I have a replacement order for 5 hard tacos, 3 5 layer burritos and 2 nachos. I'm in the book under Bill Smith.
Me: Who did you speak with?
SC: Donald.
Me: .....Mr. Dave? This guy talked to Donald and Donald promised to replace his order.
Mr Dave: Are you sure you talked to Donald?
SC: Absolutely. He said he would replace my whole order. I called yesterday at 5:30.
Mr Dave: I the only male manager here at 5:30 yesterday, there is no "Donald" that works here, and I never took a call like the one you described.
SC: Maybe it wasn't Donald...and I ment 2 days ago.
Mr Dave: You are lying. Get out.

At least he was half honest....

Me: Hello!
SC: I was here a few days ago and my order got messed up.
Me: What was wrong with it?
SC: I didn't get cheese on anyhting.
Me: Ok. Do you have the reciept?
SC: No. I threw it away.
Me: Did you speak to a manager?
SC: Yes.
Me: Which one?
SC: .....uhhhh.....I dunno.
Me: Then, I'm sorry, but I can't help you.
SC: I talked to a lady who put me in the book. I'm Darrel Roberts.
Me: We don't have a book. Besides, you just told me you didn't talk to a manager.
SC: Well, here's the thing, I spent all day working in the hot sun and I'm flat broke and my wife and kids are hungry in the hot car and I can't feed them. I lied to get food for them. They are in that van out there.

I suspected he may be lying, but I decided to give him a few expired pizzas because he was being polite and did look very tired. Here's where he went wrong. Three days later, he came back while I was working and tried to pull the same scam.

SC: Well, I've been working in the hot sun all day and me and my friends can't afford to eat. They are in that van right there. I told them I would buy food but I'm broke too.
Me: How are your kids?
SC: Huh? I don't have kids. I'm with my friends. They have been working too.
Me: You were here 3 days ago saying your wife and kids were in the van. You lied before so I'm not going to believe you now. If you want food, you need money.

He never came back.

[Hanzoku]

Too bad on the first one. I would have called the cops (in plain sight, talking loudly enough that they can hear) about trespassers on the property acting in a threatening way towards the employees.

[Polenicus]

Too bad on the first one. I would have called the cops (in plain sight, talking loudly enough that they can hear) about trespassers on the property acting in a threatening way towards the employees.

Agreed. Giving them their food only means that they're going to come back and do it again. Feeding SCs is like feeding bears, do it once and pretty soon they're prowling all the fast food places looking for free handouts, getting aggressive and eating babies.

... Okay, maybe the analogy breaks down on that last one.

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

I never knew that any restaurant kept such a "book"

[NateTheChops]

... Okay, maybe the analogy breaks down on that last one.

I wouldn't be so sure. I've met some vicious people in my time who wouldn't stop at such ends out of mere decency.

But yeah, however noble your intentions, you should never give customers free anything, much less food. Especially when they're so clearly being manipulative by playing your heartstrings. It's how people like that work.

It's the reason why I refuse to ever give out change. Apparently a lot of people in my area need "bus fare" to get to their "job interviews".

[Cai1987]

Totally should have called the cops on the scammers. All they learned is that being assholes will get them free food.

Also, the last guy - this is why people have lost faith in humanity and don't believe it when beggars say they need food money.

[Grumpy]

We didn't want to bother the cops

Your manager made a bad call, IMO. He should have called the cops.This is what the cops get paid for: Keeping order and enforcing laws. It's not bothering them to let them do their job. Most of them like doing their job. Same with CPS workers and so on.

I wish people weren't so reluctant to involve the authorities. A few conversations with unamused police officers would probably go a long way towards teaching asshats like that how to behave.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I never knew that any restaurant kept such a "book"

When I got shorted some food at the local Booger Fling, I was told to say "I'm in the book" when I came to get whatever it was they were going to give me for free to make up for it.

Of course I do not abuse this by saying "I'm in the book" every time I go there.

[Merriweather]

I never knew that any restaurant kept such a "book"

Our local "Peter Pan's friend" does, and I would guess it's a pretty full book. DH tends to run thru drive up when in a hurry and bring the food home, without always taking time to open and check every item (not to mention opening an dchecking means cold food later). The number of times it's wrong (not just tiny condiment mistakes, but major screw ups) got to the point we decided to call a manager every single time just so they know how incompetent someone there is and can address the problem. At least they were nice about it (remember so and so said you're in the book for whatever the item(s) were) when we didn't want to spend time & gas money on a repeat trip to correct things, but wish they'd just retrain their staff to get things right a larger proportion of the time in the first place.

[Jester]

Our options came down to:
1) Give them the food
2) Call the cops
3) Let them wait it out

We didn't want to bother the cops and we didn't want any more pissed off customers so Harmony made and took them their food.

No, no, no, no, and no. You HAD a fourth option.

"Leave, or we're calling the cops." Odds are good that, faced with that, most asshats will take off and not bother waiting for the cops. And if they call your bluff? Call the fucking cops. They are trespassing, attempting to commit fraud, and interfering with your business by blocking the line. And your business rewarded them for this by giving them the free food they were seeking and clearly trying to scam from the restaurant.

Fuck that. Whoever made the decision to follow this course of action chose unwisely.

She took a piece of computer paper, wrote our number on it and taped it to his steering wheel.

Harmony: Now you can never forget what number to call

Oh, please. Like those guys are going to bother with that piece of paper or that number. They are out to scam free food, period. And even if they may not be able to get it from your establishment any more, they will try other places, and that little piece of paper will end up with their food wrappers and empty soda cups, in the trash. Period.

Mr Dave: You are lying. Get out.

Precisely the tactic that should have been taken with the first two scammers, in my opinion.

If you want food, you need money.

And that is the way all these would-be scammers should be treated, rather than being kowtowed to, or appeased, or even given a little bit of free food. You want food? Bring money. This is a business, not a fucking soup kitchen.

Feeding SCs is like feeding bears, do it once and pretty soon they're prowling all the fast food places looking for free handouts, getting aggressive and eating babies.

... Okay, maybe the analogy breaks down on that last one.

Not necessarily. There are some pretty vicious (and apparently pretty hungry) SC's out there.

I never knew that any restaurant kept such a "book"

My bar has a book. It is a log that the managers keep of various happenings and incidents throughout each shift. Oftentimes it is nothing more than "slow day" or "busy shift, lots of people in town." Of course, any incident of significance is documented in said book, such as "Drunk guy puked in the bathroom," "old lady tripped and fell," or "we threw Captain Douchebag out for abusing the bartender." Do they note people who they've promised free food to? I doubt it. Situations like that, they take care of personally. "Yes, come talk to me, I am Rocking Manager, and I will make sure we take care of it." Etc., etc.

Why? Because that's just the way my bar operates. I work for some awesome people, as I've mentioned.

Not gloating, though. I honestly feel bad for those of you who don't work for such great people, especially since I've been there. (Hell, remember my last job, when I worked for Shit Weasel?)

[Andara Bledin]

Every time I've had a fast food screwup that wasn't discovered till I was at my destination (work or home), I've just called in, let them know what happened, and they've had me bring back the receipt and let them know the manager said.

And that included times when I didn't want anything but to let them know what happened. If it involved me being charged more than what I got, I'd go back. If it was the same or less or something minor, I'd often just let it go.

^-.-^

[depechemodefan]

For the first story, I imagine calling the police would take some time, esp. since it's not life threatening. I guess someone could go to the ordering point and tell people the exit is blocked by a car, so take the order from that point, have the car back up and park and wait for their order. Take much more time, though.

Apparently a lot of people in my area need "bus fare" to get to their "job interviews".

That reminds me of when I take the bus on Tues. at 10:30. I park at a Park and Ride, a station where you park you car and different busses on different routes stop. There is a woman who sits there asking for money for the bus to visit a friend. I gave her a $1 one day and she didn't get up to get on the bus. I asked her why she wasn't getting on the bus, and she said she was waiting for the other bus (which stop was further down the station).

Next week she asks me for money again and I tell her no, she got money from me last week.

[Jester]

Not money, but on a few occasions, I'll be walking out of a convenience store with a twelve-pack of beer in my hand. And some street rat (able-bodied young adult who by their own choice and laziness are neither employed nor have a residence) would ask me, "Can I have one of those?"

What's this? You, who I do not know and have never met, who are sitting out here doing nothing, who have done nothing all day, who have no money due to your own laziness and unwillingness to actually go get a fucking job, want me to give you one of my beers, which I have paid my money for, the money which I earned through busting my ass serving and entertaining people 5-6 days a week?

I generally just look at these punks and say, "No." Quietly, but firmly, leaving no room for negotiation or whiny appeal. Because, if they do make a second attempt to procure some of my cold frosty beverages, they are treated to the scathing Death Glare and some sort of vicious commentary by me similar to the one above.

Few are stupid enough to go that route, though. Generally my simple "no" accompanied by my dismissing manner is enough to tell them that I am not one to be trifled with.

Look, I have no problem with people who have fallen on hard times, and who are looking for work or perhaps money for food. I have actually helped such people out on numerous occasions. But these lazy fucks who make no attempt to work and who are seeking, not food or work, but MY BEER? For nothing? Fuck them. They can go suck an electrified barbed wire fence.

[NateTheChops]

And some street rat (able-bodied young adult who by their own choice and laziness are neither employed nor have a residence) would ask me, "Can I have one of those?"

As soon as I've drained one, you can tell me which orifice you want the bottle in. But only if the store won't give me the deposit for it. Sorry, I'm not made of money.

[Jester]

No, I wouldn't say that for a few reasons. One, I just want these fuckers to leave me alone. Two, it is not really legal to have an open container in front of most of the convenience stores down here, as most are not in the downtown "party zone." Three, a lot of them wouldn't understand the word "orifice." Four, those who did might take those as fighting words, and generally speaking, I am not trying to cause a confrontation, but merely to go about my business of either going home to drink my beer, or visiting to the girl for whome I bought the beer and (hopefully) boning her.