Tweet
The name your own price auto shop customer! Long & crude metaphor left in
I started a "Canonical list of sucky auto shop customers" thread on my mechanics' forum in honor of the one here; it is one of the longest and most viewed on that forum now. Names are changed to an alliterative pseudonym. This is one of my entries there; pardon if I geek out a bit.
Dinah Dispute & Deduct Dinah is an intermittent customer who seems to come in once a year or so for more complex repairs. She has NEVER been in for a service or routine maintenance; the car goes to cheap hacks for that. If the relationship is right, sometimes I will tease a customer for this by saying in a quavering high falsetto voice, "You've been seeing another MECHANIC, haven't you?
" Dinah here wouldn't get that, or perhaps any humor, but anyway...
She dropped off her 6 cylinder car last week with a chief complaint of "Idle low and shaky, worse when cold.." Also, "A/C not cold enough, A/C shop suspects electrical problem.
As I re-parked her car, I noticed that it had a distinct miss at idle, but it revved normally. I told Dinah what I noticed, and she said, YEAAAHHH that's it!
We did extensive checking of the intake system for leaks, a common issue on this model; none were found and the throttle was cleaned. The ignition coils were inspected and not one was cracked, a bit of a surprise. We found aged non-original dual-electrode plugs, two of which had combustion leaks up the insulator, and got approval to replace them with Dealer 3-electrode plugs. The car was checked from cool, then driven around more than average and no more misfire was noted and the idle didn't dip anymore either.
As for the A/C, I found that it had the typical leaky vacuum system that diverts the air when you accelerate and is expensive to fix inside dash, but it works normally during most driving. The duct temperature was insufficiently cool, and we determined the system was undercharged and would be much colder if simply charged correctly. After much explaining of the situation, she declined the recharge we had originally written her up for, saying she'd take it back to the last guy (who sent it out not cold enough.) Also billed her the labor of the A/C service she was already written up for.
Paid the bill and left on a Thursday. Over the weekend she left a message THE CAR'S NOT FIXED I'M BRINGING IT BACK! It was there Monday morning with the key in the mail slot, and when I called her she said, "Now it will hardly drive, I barely made it there!" Sure enough, the car which drove excellent for us last week but had an idling problem now barely made it around the block, and I got stuck for a minute at a stop sign even. Testing revealed fuel pressure dropping when the symptom appeared, and the pump was found to have voltage but it sounded peculiar. Her fuel gage didn't work and we tested and found it was the sensor. I also checked her sparse records and found 2 years ago we had recommended the Y type gas filler hose because it had a big split and we advised not to fill the tank all the way, which must have been a bizzitch with the broken gage. So, I explain the findings, break down the costs at her request, and get approval for [well into the 500-1000 range.]
She arrives 20 minutes after closing; I give her the bill and go to get the old parts. When I came back, she says, "I want to pay you, but there's a mistake. You didn't deduct for what you did that didn't fix it. I reiterated the findings and charges from the last visit, and the discussions of the cost of today's visit, and that I was not deducting the last bill from this one, it doesn't work that way. It was a LONG ARGUMENT, more than 10 minutes, the gist of which was, she's just a social worker and can't be expected to mean anything when she says her car has a problem at idle, how can she be expected to know what idle means? (That's her excuse for claiming different, unrelated symptoms each time, well documented on the work orders she signed. I wrote her up myself , and being skilled at helping non-technical people, I confirm: so the problem happens when you're NOT pressing on the gas, right? Yes.) And, I didn't tell her I was going to charge for a diagnosis today, so that means that I KNEW I WAS WRONG.
I refused to budge, saying, here is a bill for $XXX.xx, do as your consciense dictates. She throws down what she thinks is the trump card. I'm calling the POLICE!
Nonplussed, I said fine, you have a cell phone right there. I'm going to park some cars. 
Crestfallen, she retorted that that phone was actually no good. Now I have to go get the shop phone and plug it into the office jack behind the shelf for her. Is there no end to her needy-nusiance ways?
A patrol car arrived less than 15 minutes later. I sent the officer into the office to talk to her as I busied myself closing the shop, waaay way late by now. Through the glass wall between shop and office, the posture of cop and customer painted a study of body language as plain as the best of Norman Rockwell: the woman a study of earnest but unrequieted pleading; the cop an unyielding edifice bearing the burden of this city of murders, actual larceny great and small, and now, this woman's dubious complaint; with a stock facade of caring-just-enough. He stayed longer than he needed to, maintaining as I expected that this was a civil matter, and if she left without paying the disputed bill, that I could call him back and file theft charges.
Alone again, in the gathering shadows of the evening, she took her pleading to a new, darker level. I don't know how you can do this to people, Automan. I know you're expanding... you just take my money..rip people off... how can you do it etc... I stood firm: Here is a bill for $XXX.xx. Do as your conscience dictates.
Dinah asked to borrow my calculator, subtracted the last bill, and said that that was ALL she was going to pay. She was palpably shocked when I accepted.
Now, exactly like a conniving lover who miscalculates in an argument and threatens to break up with you only to be shocked when you agree, Dinah is suddenly sorry. I was really hoping we'd do business... I really want you to work on my car... We [her committee-like family] will discuss this... maybe in a couple of weeks we'll decide to pay the rest... However, UNLIKE a lover, who might give up hot make-up sex and then you dump them, there is no chance of parlaying this into any kind of good. Even if she does pay, I have long since recognized: This is Not My Customer.
I'm not speaking as we walk to the car to retrieve the floormats and give her the key and she continues making conciliatory noises at my back. Now she's sitting down... OMG, she's actually crying.
"Take that [used tank pump and sender] out as soon as you get home, it will make the whole car stink like gas." was the last word
before walking away to close, an hour and a half late. Kill them with kindness, my friend says. 
Dinah Dispute & Deduct Dinah is an intermittent customer who seems to come in once a year or so for more complex repairs. She has NEVER been in for a service or routine maintenance; the car goes to cheap hacks for that. If the relationship is right, sometimes I will tease a customer for this by saying in a quavering high falsetto voice, "You've been seeing another MECHANIC, haven't you?
" Dinah here wouldn't get that, or perhaps any humor, but anyway...She dropped off her 6 cylinder car last week with a chief complaint of "Idle low and shaky, worse when cold.." Also, "A/C not cold enough, A/C shop suspects electrical problem.
As I re-parked her car, I noticed that it had a distinct miss at idle, but it revved normally. I told Dinah what I noticed, and she said, YEAAAHHH that's it!
We did extensive checking of the intake system for leaks, a common issue on this model; none were found and the throttle was cleaned. The ignition coils were inspected and not one was cracked, a bit of a surprise. We found aged non-original dual-electrode plugs, two of which had combustion leaks up the insulator, and got approval to replace them with Dealer 3-electrode plugs. The car was checked from cool, then driven around more than average and no more misfire was noted and the idle didn't dip anymore either.
As for the A/C, I found that it had the typical leaky vacuum system that diverts the air when you accelerate and is expensive to fix inside dash, but it works normally during most driving. The duct temperature was insufficiently cool, and we determined the system was undercharged and would be much colder if simply charged correctly. After much explaining of the situation, she declined the recharge we had originally written her up for, saying she'd take it back to the last guy (who sent it out not cold enough.) Also billed her the labor of the A/C service she was already written up for.
Paid the bill and left on a Thursday. Over the weekend she left a message THE CAR'S NOT FIXED I'M BRINGING IT BACK! It was there Monday morning with the key in the mail slot, and when I called her she said, "Now it will hardly drive, I barely made it there!" Sure enough, the car which drove excellent for us last week but had an idling problem now barely made it around the block, and I got stuck for a minute at a stop sign even. Testing revealed fuel pressure dropping when the symptom appeared, and the pump was found to have voltage but it sounded peculiar. Her fuel gage didn't work and we tested and found it was the sensor. I also checked her sparse records and found 2 years ago we had recommended the Y type gas filler hose because it had a big split and we advised not to fill the tank all the way, which must have been a bizzitch with the broken gage. So, I explain the findings, break down the costs at her request, and get approval for [well into the 500-1000 range.]
She arrives 20 minutes after closing; I give her the bill and go to get the old parts. When I came back, she says, "I want to pay you, but there's a mistake. You didn't deduct for what you did that didn't fix it. I reiterated the findings and charges from the last visit, and the discussions of the cost of today's visit, and that I was not deducting the last bill from this one, it doesn't work that way. It was a LONG ARGUMENT, more than 10 minutes, the gist of which was, she's just a social worker and can't be expected to mean anything when she says her car has a problem at idle, how can she be expected to know what idle means? (That's her excuse for claiming different, unrelated symptoms each time, well documented on the work orders she signed. I wrote her up myself , and being skilled at helping non-technical people, I confirm: so the problem happens when you're NOT pressing on the gas, right? Yes.) And, I didn't tell her I was going to charge for a diagnosis today, so that means that I KNEW I WAS WRONG.
I refused to budge, saying, here is a bill for $XXX.xx, do as your consciense dictates. She throws down what she thinks is the trump card. I'm calling the POLICE!
Nonplussed, I said fine, you have a cell phone right there. I'm going to park some cars. Crestfallen, she retorted that that phone was actually no good. Now I have to go get the shop phone and plug it into the office jack behind the shelf for her. Is there no end to her needy-nusiance ways?A patrol car arrived less than 15 minutes later. I sent the officer into the office to talk to her as I busied myself closing the shop, waaay way late by now. Through the glass wall between shop and office, the posture of cop and customer painted a study of body language as plain as the best of Norman Rockwell: the woman a study of earnest but unrequieted pleading; the cop an unyielding edifice bearing the burden of this city of murders, actual larceny great and small, and now, this woman's dubious complaint; with a stock facade of caring-just-enough. He stayed longer than he needed to, maintaining as I expected that this was a civil matter, and if she left without paying the disputed bill, that I could call him back and file theft charges.
Alone again, in the gathering shadows of the evening, she took her pleading to a new, darker level. I don't know how you can do this to people, Automan. I know you're expanding... you just take my money..rip people off... how can you do it etc... I stood firm: Here is a bill for $XXX.xx. Do as your conscience dictates.
Dinah asked to borrow my calculator, subtracted the last bill, and said that that was ALL she was going to pay. She was palpably shocked when I accepted.
Now, exactly like a conniving lover who miscalculates in an argument and threatens to break up with you only to be shocked when you agree, Dinah is suddenly sorry. I was really hoping we'd do business... I really want you to work on my car... We [her committee-like family] will discuss this... maybe in a couple of weeks we'll decide to pay the rest... However, UNLIKE a lover, who might give up hot make-up sex and then you dump them, there is no chance of parlaying this into any kind of good. Even if she does pay, I have long since recognized: This is Not My Customer.
I'm not speaking as we walk to the car to retrieve the floormats and give her the key and she continues making conciliatory noises at my back. Now she's sitting down... OMG, she's actually crying.
"Take that [used tank pump and sender] out as soon as you get home, it will make the whole car stink like gas." was the last word
before walking away to close, an hour and a half late. Kill them with kindness, my friend says.
Comment