That's not even our brand! Stop trying to return it!

[ShadowTiger]

{Background}
So I cut keys at a slightly lesserly (It's a word now, nyahaha!) known Hardware store. We actually have our own brand of almost all of the blanks. It's very obvious when you look at a key and see whether or not it was made in my store or at some other store. Very obvious.

Unfortunately, this concept is lost on some, so it would seem...

Today, a sir came in to the store, walked to the key desk, and wanted to get a free copy of a key made because "it doesn't work." He insists he made it here. It was an Axxess key, I think.

Oh I definitely have the same type of blank, yes I do. A Schlage SC1. Very simple. The thing is, it's not Axxess. Case, point, and match. Any argument ends there. We are NOT to copy a key onto a blank that the customer brings in themselves. Period. Liability issues.
----------------------------------------------------------- {/Background}


So the customer shows us the key,
Customer: "This key doesn't work! Make me a new one!"
Hardware Guy: *Looks at it* "Hm. Doesn't look like one of the ones I made."
Customer: "Of course it was. I always get my keys here!"
Hardware Guy: "I'll bet you do. You must have given me the wrong key then."
Customer: "I didn't! That's the key!"
Hardware Guy: "No, see, it doesn't have our brand on it. Just about all of the keys we make here have our store's logo on it. See?" *Takes out a bunch of his keys to show him*
Customer: "But I made this key right here!"
Hardware Guy: "Okay then, got a receipt for me?"
Customer: "No, I lost it."
Hardware Guy: "Ooookay. So when was it made?"
Customer: "I dunno, a couple months ago."
Hardware Guy: "And you waited this long to get it fixed?"
Customer: *flustered and stammering* "It.. it was a rough couple of months."
Hardware Guy: "Well I'm sorry to hear." o_o "I hope everything is okay now..."
Customer: "Just make me the key."
Hardware Guy: "I'll be glad to make you a new key. Got an original one for me to copy?"
Customer: *Slides the same Axxess brand key to the Hardware Guy*
Hardware Guy: "No, I mean an original key that works."
Customer: *Simply stares and blinks at him*
Hardware Guy: *sighs* "I think I'm missing something. Doesn't this key not work?"
Customer: *Angry* "No it doesn't!"
Hardware Guy: "Why are you giving me a key to copy if you know it doesn't work?"
Customer: *Even angrier* "ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE ME A KEY OR AREN'T YOU?! DO WHAT I SAY!"
Hardware Guy: "Sorry, I really don't want to be the guy to make you a key if it's not going to work. Maybe go to the locksmith a mile down the block and see what they say about it."
Customer: "But I want a key from here!"
Hardware Guy: "May I ask why then?" *Leans forward on the desk, intrigued, as he is wont to be*
Customer: "Because I made it here!"
Hardware Guy: "... ... I feel like we're going in circles here."
Customer: "MAKE. ME. THIS. KEY."
Hardware Guy: "Circles." * o_o *

Me: "Yep. Circles."
Customer: "<angry red-faced gibberish and key/arm flailing>"
Hardware Guy: "Just go down the street to the locksmith. He'll take care of ya."
Customer: "<Angry red-faced gibberish and key/arm flailing>"
Me: (Softly) "I think I saw this in a movie once."
Hardware Guy: (Softly) "King Kong." ;-p
Customer: "HAVE YOU MADE ME MY KEY YET?!"
Hardware Guy: "I don't think I can make this one. It doesn't look like I have the blank anyway." ( )
Customer: "BUT I MADE IT HERE!"
Hardware Guy: "Okay, I'll bite. Show me which key it is."
Customer: *King Kong Stormily Ragewalks up behind the desk and pulls open drawers of keys, fingering through the keys until he finds one that he likes, and absolutely thrusts it right into Hardware Guy's face* "THIS ONE!!"
Hardware Guy: "Pfft, that key wouldn't even go into the lock. Try again, hotshot."
Customer: *Throws the key he's holding to the floor and storms away, swearing at everyone and kicks a display of paper towels, and swears at them too.*

Hardware Guy: "Did he just call those paper towels a ^%@#?"
Me: "I think so."
Hardware Guy: "What a schmuck."
Me: "The schmuckiest."
Hardware Guy: "Trying to pull a scam on us. What does he think we are, chopped liver?"
Me: "I think he was about to throw his liver at us if we didn't fall for his scam."
Hardware Guy:
Me:

*Cue Ending Theme Song*

[Merriweather]

Had to be a scammer wanting a free key (possibly to someone else's place). I mean, seriously, who could not understand that if a copy of a key doesn't work, it's a bad copy, and if you copy the bad copy, you just get yet another bad copy. Someone with the IQ of a goldfish could get that. And speaking of IQ's, I think mine went down a couple of points just reading about that guy.

[BrenDAnn]

O.o I...wow...I think I need to reboot my brain after reading that. I mean who actually does that? I agree it may have been a key to someone else's house, a house perchance he wasn't supposed to be in. By copying that key, you/Hardware Guy could've been helping him stalk someone/steal someone else's stuff. Glad Harware Guy held his ground!

[underemployeed]

Well, I have copies of copies that work, but it is true that the more original the key is the better it will work, especially since I have had a few people copy keys and mess them up where you have to partially insert the key to get it to work. I guess I can understand the make the key thing if your a locksmith that had the tools to figure out what the "code" is and recut a perfect blank, but im pretty sure most hardware stores only have the machine that traces the original

[Anamal]

One time this guy brought up a bag of salad, and said it went bad too soon and was hoping to exchange it. I said sure, just go grab another bag (it's just salad, I honestly didn't care.)

He brings up a new bag, but the names don't match. I asked him if he grabbed the right one, but insisted that was the only one over there. I looked at his original bag, and realized that I didn't recognize it, at all.

I began to look at it and realized the UPC was completely torn away. The guy says that was where he opened it. Yeah okay. Then at the bottom (I was looking for details, I saw it said KROGER.COM.)

I pointed that out to him and said he probably got it at Kroger. He says, no, he got it here, and he doesn't know why it says anything about Kroger. :|

Anyways, of course he doesn't have a receipt. There's no original UPC or a new product with the same barcode. I ignored the fact that he was trying to scam his way into getting a fresh bag of $2 salad (again, which I would have HAPPILY done) and told him there was no way I could physically do it. He gave in and bought the new bag.

Ugh.

[Mytical]

Making a copy of a non working copy really doesn't work that well. If the thing you are copying is bad/wrong..then whatever comes out is going to be bad/wrong. For instance..

You what copies of a flyer that says "First house on the left.", but the flyer you bring in says "Last house on right" when you copy it ..it is not going to magically say "First house on the left."

[barainga]

Definitely a schmuck

[ShadowTiger]

I have had a few people copy keys and mess them up where you have to partially insert the key to get it to work.

That's actually pretty easy to do. Not all blanks are the same, apparently. I've had some Schlage keys that match an SC1, but are just an eighth of an inch too long, meaning my SC1 would have to have its shoulder shaved off a little. It happens anyway but it's nerve-wracking to do, because you have absolutely no leeway in the lock. It's either in all the way and it'll work, or it's in 98.5% of the way and it won't turn.

I'm constantly afraid of these little unexpected varieties.

Still easier than cutting shades though. >.> Keys don't have that "human relative measurement" problem attached to them as much.

[Can I Help Your A$$?]

While I agree that the word "lesserly" is rather elegant, the word that would have worked there is simply "less."

[Stryker One]

Specs.

Just curious. Is there a spec to how far off a key can be and still work? How many times can you make a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy... before it just won't work?

[Seshat]

It depends on how accurate each copy is - and how finicky the lock is. Some locks are higher quality than others, and require a more precise key.

[Andara Bledin]

It depends on how accurate each copy is - and how finicky the lock is. Some locks are higher quality than others, and require a more precise key.

It also depends on how worn the original was in the first place, and how well-made each of the copies is.

^-.-^

[ShadowTiger]

Yeah, I've seen at least two keys that were so worn that they apparently stopped working altogether. They came in to the store hoping I could do something about it. Luckily both guys were regulars, so they worked with us rather than just expecting the best and getting the worst. We were kinda hoping that actually doing a quick, shoddy pass over the keys would kinda "reset" them.

Oddly, one attempt actually worked. I was a bit surprised.

[Ironclad Alibi]

It's either in all the way and it'll work, or it's in 98.5% of the way and it won't turn.

I have had keys like that, the 98.5% kind. Fortunately I'm an engineer and I have a set of files.

To save SheldonRS the effort, I have had it in 98.5% of the way and it still worked.

[Mr Hero]

Hardware Guy: "Just go down the street to the locksmith. He'll take care of ya."
*snip*
Me: (Softly) "I think I saw this in a movie once."

Call the locksmith!

I also wanted to reply to this thread with "Are you the Keymaster?"