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This was a call I took very late in my shift on Friday night and it was actually pretty comical, except I was getting worried he'd never let me off the phone.
Guy calls in and it doesn't take more than a few words out of his mouth for me to know he's either drunk, REALLY stupid, or both. I think probably both. I ask for his name as part of my opening spiel and he gives me a name. Turns out that's not HIS name, it's the name of the guy he's calling for. Apparently his buddy is at the Mecum Auto Auctions trying to buy a car so he can't call for himself...I'm sure he's really thankful he has his drunk buddy calling us on his behalf...
Basically, the drunk guy wants his good friend, who "just went through a divorce and has a new house and needs stuff for it" (I must have heard that about 20 times, interspersed with the bit about the auto auction), to get our catalogs. Because Drunk Guy has the catalog and his friend saw it and really loved it. Drunk Guy thinks his friend would buy SOOOO much stuff from us. I said I'd be happy to add the gentleman to our catalog list (although I was a bit wary about doing it for someone other than the caller, but I haven't had anyone tell me I couldn't...). Then Drunk Guy starts getting belligerent. Says he's called 3 times before and asked to have Divorced Buddy get the catalog and he never gets it. Then he says he KNOWS he's talked to ME before, he recognizes my voice and I PROMISED I'd send the catalog and I never did it!!!!!eleventy!
I said I'm sorry, sir, I don't remember that at all but I'd be happy to add Mr. Divorced Buddy to the list right now if you'd like. He started berating me for not wanting to send people catalogs, "why won't you send him the fucking catalog? Do you not want people to buy your stuff? blargle blargle"
This went on for a good long time until I finally pried the friend's name and address out of Drunk Guy with plenty of cursing on his part all the way. I'm pretty sure he called me an idiot at some point but I was laughing to myself so I missed the exact words
He repeated the same old crap over and over and over and then finally said "Aw, fuck it" and hung up. Hooray! 
It was an annoying call but at the same time it was hilarious. I couldn't picture the guy talking to me on the phone as having enough money in his pocket at any given time for a 6-pack AND some smokes, let alone High End Home Store products. I sure hope his friend did well at the Mecum Auto Auction so it will soften the blow a bit if my cunning plan to deprive him of our catalogs works out.
Guy calls in and it doesn't take more than a few words out of his mouth for me to know he's either drunk, REALLY stupid, or both. I think probably both. I ask for his name as part of my opening spiel and he gives me a name. Turns out that's not HIS name, it's the name of the guy he's calling for. Apparently his buddy is at the Mecum Auto Auctions trying to buy a car so he can't call for himself...I'm sure he's really thankful he has his drunk buddy calling us on his behalf...
Basically, the drunk guy wants his good friend, who "just went through a divorce and has a new house and needs stuff for it" (I must have heard that about 20 times, interspersed with the bit about the auto auction), to get our catalogs. Because Drunk Guy has the catalog and his friend saw it and really loved it. Drunk Guy thinks his friend would buy SOOOO much stuff from us. I said I'd be happy to add the gentleman to our catalog list (although I was a bit wary about doing it for someone other than the caller, but I haven't had anyone tell me I couldn't...). Then Drunk Guy starts getting belligerent. Says he's called 3 times before and asked to have Divorced Buddy get the catalog and he never gets it. Then he says he KNOWS he's talked to ME before, he recognizes my voice and I PROMISED I'd send the catalog and I never did it!!!!!eleventy!
I said I'm sorry, sir, I don't remember that at all but I'd be happy to add Mr. Divorced Buddy to the list right now if you'd like. He started berating me for not wanting to send people catalogs, "why won't you send him the fucking catalog? Do you not want people to buy your stuff? blargle blargle"This went on for a good long time until I finally pried the friend's name and address out of Drunk Guy with plenty of cursing on his part all the way. I'm pretty sure he called me an idiot at some point but I was laughing to myself so I missed the exact words
He repeated the same old crap over and over and over and then finally said "Aw, fuck it" and hung up. Hooray! It was an annoying call but at the same time it was hilarious. I couldn't picture the guy talking to me on the phone as having enough money in his pocket at any given time for a 6-pack AND some smokes, let alone High End Home Store products. I sure hope his friend did well at the Mecum Auto Auction so it will soften the blow a bit if my cunning plan to deprive him of our catalogs works out.
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