Inhabitants of the Ghost Zone (Long)

[fireheart]

She's clearly never heard of invasive species or carnivorous plants.

Thanks to you and the crazy batshit woman you were quoting, I have this image now of plants forming armies and hopping around in their pots.

"General Birch! The Oaks are attacking the local park!"
"We must send.....*dramatic pause* the POLLINATORS!"
"Pollinators, atten-hut! We must march to the local park and take back the park from the Oaks!"
"Yes sir!"
"Ready! Aim! Pollinate!"

[Sapphire Silk]

Thanks to you and the crazy batshit woman you were quoting, I have this image now of plants forming armies and hopping around in their pots.

"General Birch! The Oaks are attacking the local park!"
"We must send.....*dramatic pause* the POLLINATORS!"
"Pollinators, atten-hut! We must march to the local park and take back the park from the Oaks!"
"Yes sir!"
"Ready! Aim! Pollinate!"

"General Birch, General Birth! The Oaks are counter attacking! They're pelting us with a hail of acorns!"
"Nuts! Time to peel outta here!"

[dalesys]

"General Birch, General Birth! The Oaks are counter attacking! They're pelting us with a hail of acorns!"
"Nuts! Time to peel outta here!"

The Second Banana greased our retreat.

[mikoyan29]

Name your price, does the woman think you guys are Shatner?

And the Police Officer should be named Sylvester..."I am the Law!!!"

[BeenThereDoneThat]

I'm sorry, I'm just laughing much too hard to think of any good comebacks on any of those...so sorry you have to deal with those brain-cell-challenged "people", but... hahahahahahahahahhahaah!!!!

[thatcrazyredhead]

SC: What’s the point of going somewhere if you can’t shoot something?

This is officially my favorite sentence of the day.

[CinSim]

He has actually led some co-workers to tears arguing and insulting them. Now, either my boss or myself are the only ones who will deal with him.
Phone: Ring, ring, ring! Ring, ring, ring! Phone Call! Phone Call!
Boss&Me: *Stares in horror at the number on the phone*
Boss: You.
Me: No you.
Boss&Me: *Rock Paper Scissors*
Boss: Scissors cut paper. *Runs out of office*
Me: *gulps* Thank you for calling *Company.* This is Princess, how may I help you?

Horrified at the story, laughing at this intro! I recognize its inner truth! I have shared this with only 2 co-workers so far, but the rest will see it soon, and next time that one certain number shows up, rock paper scissors will commence!

[Ironclad Alibi]

Phone: Ring, ring, ring! Ring, ring, ring! Phone Call! Phone Call!
Boss&Me: *Stares in horror at the number on the phone*
Boss: You.
Me: No you.
Boss&Me: *Rock Paper Scissors*
Boss: Scissors cut paper. *Runs out of office*

You should strive to make the next encounter more interesting, and challenging. Use rock-paper-scissors-25. There is even a Flash implementation to help two people play it.

[fireheart]

You should strive to make the next encounter more interesting, and challenging. Use rock-paper-scissors-25. There is even a Flash implementation to help two people play it.

No, you should play this: Rock-paper-scissors-lizard-spock

[Pixilated]

Love the guy who went from cop to lawyer to judge in 30 seconds flat ...

And I had to laugh about you and your boss playing rock-paper-scissors to see who gets to handle Mr. Asshat. Glad to hear your boss will refuse to deal with him once this trip is over. Hope your sanity holds out until then.

Also love the people who threaten to "tell all my friends" how awful a company is. The way they behave leaves you wondering if they've GOT any friends.

[Syriilord]

She should have planned a trip to Ireland, then. Hopefully, she'd find some druid cult that still celebrates Samhain in the traditional way.

Oh hells no. Don't be sending your crazies here. We have more than enough of our own already

[protege]

Especially that last one, I'd want to shoot him with a pumpkin.

I'd' rather shoot him with an elephant gun. No, not *that* kind of elephant gun. I want one that shoots elephants. I have a feeling that the sight of a pachyderm suddenly flying at the target...would be enough to make the target shit its pants

[dalesys]

... pachyderm suddenly flying at the target...

No no... not Dumbo!
[/Rubber Band]

[Nemesis44UK]

I don't understand how you have to put up with so much abuse. Do your bosses allow that to go on?

I don't know about the US, but in the UK, if someone starts F'ing this and that and calling me bitch, the phone's going down until that syphilitic warthog learns some manners.

[wolfie]

I don't know about the US, but in the UK, if someone starts F'ing this and that and calling me bitch, the phone's going down until that syphilitic warthog learns some manners.

Just curious, but why are you libelling syphilitic warthogs by equating them to abusive customers?