Wherein We Use The F Word With Unsettling Frequency

[NateTheChops]

fucking can't come get your fucking dog because fuckity fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck look at Fucky go.

Wow, you just made listening to that song over the next three days loads more bearable.

[Sapphire Silk]

Thats Quite Impressive

I passed a trio of fine young gentlemen a block from here on the way to work. Two of which were struggling to drag the third. Who, when I passed, slurred my new favourite line of the week:

"Oh god, I think I roofie'd myself"

There is Karma! Hope his friends left him in an embarrassingly awkward position, since he won't remember that he roofied himself when he wakes up.

Crossroads

You have discovered fire my friend, yet still cannot grasp why you keep getting burnt when you try to pick it up.

I love this! Can haz as sig?

How Not To Ask For A Favour

Translink Presents: How Not To Ask For A Favour

<snip>Because, really, who wouldn’t want to hand a $400 iPhone over to a loud, rude, obnoxious raging psychotic in the middle of a total melt down.

After failing to obtain a cell phone, be sure to spend the next 5 minutes of the ride to the next station in the corner ranting and yelling about how we’re all fucking assholes and how we’re killing you and you can’t believe that no one would lend you their phone for like 10 seconds so you can call your fucking mom because she fucking has your fucking dog and she'll be fucking late if you don't fucking call her right now because you fucking can't come get your fucking dog because fuckity fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck look at Fucky go.

Well, I certainly would not have given this guy my cellphone. Though I might have made a call to 911 or the BC equivalent.

But really . . . by this point didn't this guy figure out that Mom realized she had his fucking dog? Really . . . didn't she know? And since he's such a total dipwad, doesn't she already know said dipwad isn't going to show up to get the dog so she can get to work on time?

The fail here just compounds belief.

OTOH, I'm glad I finished breakfast before I read this. No donut on the computer screen today

[vikingchyk]

Hmm...this board doesn't have Segoe Script built in so I'll just have to show everybody what that back pocket/seat of the pants must look like...



Just...wow.

Back when I was in college, I bought sweatpants with the name of my uni emblazoned across the butt. Hey, it was in style then. Sort of Anyway, I'm home visiting my parents over the holidays, and I'm suiting up to go help shovel snow. My dad comes up behind me as I'm sitting in the dining room chair, bent over putting on my snow boots, and exclaims " 'Illinois'?? You have enough room for 'Massachusetts' back there! "

Thanks, Dad.

[moekosowl]

Re: The Ballad of Jim.... GK, I think you may be the patron deity of these idiots now. You have my sympathy.
Re: That's Quite Impressive: I think I just ruptured something laughing....

[Jester]

Jester, I gotta know : is Frank's real name Mark?

No. First of all, he would never extoll the virtues of prostitution, or waste his time writing a website as ridiculous and pathetic as that one.

Second of all, his real name is, in fact, Frank. He is actually the only one of my friends that I refer to by their real name on this site. Because, honestly, he is the only one that I couldn't think of a suitable pseudonym for. He is, well, Frank. And no other name would so accurately describe him.

[Kristev]

Careful. I'm a Frank myself.

[Teefies2]

::::

Kristev is Frank????????????????

[dalesys]

I'm Frank too in the middle...
but my ends blowviate often.

[Jester]

Careful. I'm a Frank myself.

I was not insulting Franks, as I know a lot of them, as does my friend Frank. But if you knew Frank, you would know that Frank is the only way to describe him, frankly.

Yeah, that makes sense....kind of.

[Sapphire Silk]

I was not insulting Franks, as I know a lot of them, as does my friend Frank. But if you knew Frank, you would know that Frank is the only way to describe him, frankly.

Yeah, that makes sense....kind of.

Makes perfect sense to me.

I had a friend named David. We called him "The David," because the name fit him so perfectly well.

[Kristev]

No. Frank is my name.

[Mr Hero]

All this talk about Franks is making me crave hot dogs.

[XCashier]

fuckity fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck look at Fucky go.

Oh, now, this is just wrong.

But funny!

[Kristev]

As long as nobody brings up Dr. Frank-N-Furter, we're fine.

[Jester]

Just don't ask about Dr. Frank-n-Beans. I don't know that you really want to know.