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Angry birds...in a department store!

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  • Angry birds...in a department store!

    For some reason such as our buyers tend to make drunken inbred retarded chimpanzees look smart by comparison, some time ago we got in a bunch of little pillows shaped like Angry Birds birds and pigs.

    They didn't sell worth a shit so they're on clearance now and banished to a back endstand in domestics.

    My co-worker was tidying up in there yesterday when a gaggle of preteen girls came tearing out an aisle, giggling and nearly running her over.

    Co-worker went to investigate, and found the pillows strewn all over various aisles, having been gleefully chucked around the department by that bunch of [sanitized for my protection] in a sugared-up frenzy. I mean, these things were everywhere. Plus in a few spots they took out merchandise that was properly shelved on the way down, killing an imaginary pig or two in the process.

    I obviously picked the wrong time to be a kid. Who knew there would come a time where kids could act like howler monkeys on amphetamines, their parents would do nothing about it, and would unload on anybody in the vicinity who tried to get them to act like human beings?
    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

  • #2
    I once read a facebook status of someone who did this exact type of thing. But it was in her apartment. Why? She has too much manners to pull this kind of shit in public with merchendise that's not hers. Your customers certainly special.
    To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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    • #3
      Too bad you can't put their ass in a sling, release and watch them volley into the neighboring building.

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth emax4 View Post
        Too bad you can't put their ass in a sling, release and watch them volley into the neighboring building.
        that's one ingenious way to kick them out of a store!

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        • #5
          I love the little angry bird pillows! You can send them all to me, so those naughty kids can't abuse them!
          "If anyone wants this old box containing the broken bits of my former faith in humanity, I'll take your best offer now. You may be able to salvage a few of em' for parts..... " - Quote by Argabarga

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          • #6
            We have Angry Bird dog toys. I'm tempted to get some so my vicious 8 and 4 lb monsters can chew through them .

            Back OT

            I wonder what would happen if they did that at person's home with the person's stuff.

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            • #7
              Maybe the developer (Rovio) can make a spinoff game; "ANGRY EMPLOYEE"

              Tap and hold the button down on the screen to wind the leg back and pick the angle, then release to see the ANGRY EMPLOYEE kick the SC out of the store.

              In ANGRY BIRDS when a bird is released, you'll sometimes hear a "WHEEEEEE". in this game when an SC is kicked out, you'll hear, "AAAUURRRGGHHH!" or "Moooommmmeeeeeee..."

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              • #8
                Quoth emax4 View Post
                Maybe the developer (Rovio) can make a spinoff game; "ANGRY EMPLOYEE"

                Tap and hold the button down on the screen to wind the leg back and pick the angle, then release to see the ANGRY EMPLOYEE kick the SC out of the store.

                In ANGRY BIRDS when a bird is released, you'll sometimes hear a "WHEEEEEE". in this game when an SC is kicked out, you'll hear, "AAAUURRRGGHHH!" or "Moooommmmeeeeeee..."
                Or "I'llsuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuueeeeee......"
                The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                Now queen of USSR-Land...

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                • #9
                  Or "Iregretnothinnnnnnnnnng..."
                  PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                  There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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                  • #10
                    The level to which Angry Birds has infected our culture really amazes me. I saw Angry Birds candy in the discount stores recently. They have pencil erasers, school supplies and calenders now.

                    Don't get me wrong, I applaud the creators and it proves the idea that the simplest ideas are the most successful. After all, Pacman made a similar impact in the 80's and it was basically about a guy popping pills and chasing "ghosts".

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                    • #11
                      I haven't played it in over 6 months, but now I'm humming the theme music to myself - I WAS CLEAN, DAMMIT!
                      This was one of those times where my mouth says "have a nice day" but my brain says "go step on a Lego". - RegisterAce
                      I can't make something magically appear to fulfill all your hopes and dreams. Believe me, if I could I'd be the first person I'd help. - Trixie

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                      • #12
                        Quoth NateTheChops View Post
                        Don't get me wrong, I applaud the creators and it proves the idea that the simplest ideas are the most successful. After all, Pacman made a similar impact in the 80's and it was basically about a guy popping pills and chasing "ghosts".
                        Did you know that the original name for Pac-Man was Puck-Man? You'd think it was because he looks like a hockey puck but it actually comes from the Japanese phrase 'Paku-Paku,' which means to flap one's mouth open and closed. They changed it because they thought Puck-Man would be too easy to vandalize, you know, like people could just scratch off the P and turn it into an F or whatever.
                        To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth Mr Hero View Post
                          Did you know that the original name for Pac-Man was Puck-Man? You'd think it was because he looks like a hockey puck but it actually comes from the Japanese phrase 'Paku-Paku,' which means to flap one's mouth open and closed. They changed it because they thought Puck-Man would be too easy to vandalize, you know, like people could just scratch off the P and turn it into an F or whatever.


                          MMMMMISSSTERRRRRRRRR PILLLLLLLLLLLLGRIM!
                          PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                          There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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                          • #14
                            I played Angry Birds once. I thought it was stupid. So it fits that these kids thought that they should play a live action version of it in your store. Kids are by definition stupid and adults (parents) are supposed to devote the time to making them un-stupid. Since most parents are as stupid as the kids, it's a lost cause. I hope you didn't have to work too hard cleaning up the mess.

                            By the way, I want to thank you for the link to buckyville.com. A few weeks back I saw your signature, got curious about the place and found the link to some killer recipes http://buckyville.yuku.com/forums/15...ng-But-Recipes Someone mentioned a great smoker, I checked it out, found it was on sale and bought a Master Built smoker. So, thank you for the link that led me to the best darn chicken I've ever cooked.

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                            • #15
                              Speaking of "Angry Birds" in a department store... it'd be funny if people in the UK took this as "angry young females in a department store"

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