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Sir, Pond Scum Are More Worthy Than You
So, my dad is diabetic. I mean, really badly diabetic. Combine that with an unfortunate workaholic tendancy that frequently leaves him hours late on his insulin shots, and the rest of the family has taken to organising a multitude of measure to help him keep his blood sugar something approximating normal long enough for him to get home of an evening.
The biggest of these measures has been leaving specially labelled jars of jelly beans that his doctor recommended for a quick pickup in his office, his secretary's office, and his work's conference room. On top of that, I made up a jar for a sandwich shop in the same building as his office where he almost always buys his lunch. The people who run it are fairly close friends of the family, so when I explained they were quite happy to sit it up in the employee-only area behind the counter.
The jar was very clearly labelled For (Tolly's Dad) Only! In case of low blood sugar, take some and have a coffee. in big black letters. Cue bastard of an SC.
Today, I come in to see my dad for lunch, so I stop to grab sandwiches. There's a guy in front of me, grumping at the poor worker because oh no, toasted sandwiches take a few minutes and he should get 50% off for having to wait! Oh, the horror!
Needless to say, the worker is not giving an inch. Good on him. SC gets increasingly sucky. Finally he snaps and storms behind the counter. I'm ready to tackle him if he so much as raises his hand to the Poor Abused Worker, but instead he... Steals. my dad's. Jelly beans. The entire smegging jar. Grrrr.
Me: Hey! Put those back! They're not yours!
SC: Yes they are! I'm (Tolly's Dad)!
PAW: No, you're really not. I know (Tolly's Dad). He's taller than you.
SC: Of course I am! I'm going to talk to your manager and have you fired! *starts eating the jelly beans*
Me: If you don't put those back right this second I'm gonna call the cops. You are not (Tolly's Dad) and it's illegal to pretend you are.
SC: And how would you
know, you little bitch?
Me:
BECAUSE I'M TOLLY, ASSHOLE!
You could hear me through the entire building, it seems.
Needless to say, mister sucky customer changes his tune. Too late, PAW's CW (who was on break) has already called the security guy over his behaviour.
Guy gets told to get the hell out and if he comes back they'll call the cops. He never does get his sandwich. I get to explain to my dad why I screamed 'asshole' at the top of my lungs in his workplace. Thankfully his clients were pretty awesome people who were amused when they heard the story.
(I did get an SMS from Dad a couple of hours ago to tell me that he came back two hours later and started threatening the PAW and his CW. Security came, cops were called, charges are being pressed. I may have to testify if he fights it. I will do so happily. Ass.)
I just... If the people who run the shop know us well enough to put emergency jellybeans behind their counter, did you really think that you could get away with that crap? Or with swearing at people? Or abusing the workers and tresspassing? Sheez.
The biggest of these measures has been leaving specially labelled jars of jelly beans that his doctor recommended for a quick pickup in his office, his secretary's office, and his work's conference room. On top of that, I made up a jar for a sandwich shop in the same building as his office where he almost always buys his lunch. The people who run it are fairly close friends of the family, so when I explained they were quite happy to sit it up in the employee-only area behind the counter.
The jar was very clearly labelled For (Tolly's Dad) Only! In case of low blood sugar, take some and have a coffee. in big black letters. Cue bastard of an SC.
Today, I come in to see my dad for lunch, so I stop to grab sandwiches. There's a guy in front of me, grumping at the poor worker because oh no, toasted sandwiches take a few minutes and he should get 50% off for having to wait! Oh, the horror!
Needless to say, the worker is not giving an inch. Good on him. SC gets increasingly sucky. Finally he snaps and storms behind the counter. I'm ready to tackle him if he so much as raises his hand to the Poor Abused Worker, but instead he... Steals. my dad's. Jelly beans. The entire smegging jar. Grrrr.
Me: Hey! Put those back! They're not yours!
SC: Yes they are! I'm (Tolly's Dad)!
PAW: No, you're really not. I know (Tolly's Dad). He's taller than you.
SC: Of course I am! I'm going to talk to your manager and have you fired! *starts eating the jelly beans*
Me: If you don't put those back right this second I'm gonna call the cops. You are not (Tolly's Dad) and it's illegal to pretend you are.
SC: And how would you
know, you little bitch?Me:
BECAUSE I'M TOLLY, ASSHOLE!You could hear me through the entire building, it seems.
Needless to say, mister sucky customer changes his tune. Too late, PAW's CW (who was on break) has already called the security guy over his behaviour.Guy gets told to get the hell out and if he comes back they'll call the cops. He never does get his sandwich. I get to explain to my dad why I screamed 'asshole' at the top of my lungs in his workplace. Thankfully his clients were pretty awesome people who were amused when they heard the story.
(I did get an SMS from Dad a couple of hours ago to tell me that he came back two hours later and started threatening the PAW and his CW. Security came, cops were called, charges are being pressed. I may have to testify if he fights it. I will do so happily. Ass.)
I just... If the people who run the shop know us well enough to put emergency jellybeans behind their counter, did you really think that you could get away with that crap? Or with swearing at people? Or abusing the workers and tresspassing? Sheez.
Tolly! (my dad's a diabetic workaholic too 
)
If you do have to testify against him, don't forget to tell us all about it! Especially the part where the judge lays the smackdown on him. Do people still say smackdown? Oh well.
, and I dare say that the judge with throw an entire library of books at him. Security cameras, baby. 
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