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Call center classics #1: "But it's an emergency!"

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  • #1

    Call center classics #1: "But it's an emergency!"

    I've previously posted many of these several years ago when I worked at a call center, but I figured why not take a trip down (sucky) memory lane and post a few again because times may change but SCs stay the same.

    On to the fun...

    Me: Thank you for calling empire wireless, my name is--
    SC: CUT MY PHONE ON!
    (oh boy, this is going to be fun)
    Me: I will certainly do what I can do to help you, but I need your phone or account number first.
    SC: XXX-XXXX
    Me: And your pass code for verification?
    SC: CUT MY PHONE ON!
    Me: I'm sorry that's not correct.
    SC: What?
    Me: 'Cut my phone on' is not the right pass code
    SC: Ugh, I can't believe this...the pass code is ENTITLEMENT (NOT the actual code)
    Me: Thank you, now you're having problems with your phone?
    SC: No, I'm having problems with you people. Here's the deal I'm traveling between big town and smallville, my car broke down and I NEED to be able to make phone calls to get some help.
    Me: I see here you haven't paid your bill in about a month and half...
    SC: So?
    Me:(facepalm) Well, that's why you don't have service, you were disconnected for non payment.
    SC: OH MY GOD! I don't believe this.
    Me: Can you make a payment today?
    SC: No I can't pay anything today but I really need my phone on.
    Me: I'm sorry if you can't pay anything there's nothing I can do.
    SC: *long string of profanity* -- I've had extensions before when I can't pay, why can't I get one now??
    Me: We do give extensions, but once your account is suspended for nonpayment the system won't allow us to do that. (NOT 100% true, but pretty close)
    SC: Ok look, this is an EMERGENCY. Do you understand what an emergency is?? It means I'm stuck and I need you to CUT MY PHONE ON!
    Me: I know about emergencies. If you are in serious trouble you can still call 911 even though your service is cut off.
    SC: I don't need no 911! This isn't THAT kind of emergency!
    (you don't say...)
    Me: Well as I said, that's your only option unless you make a payment.
    SC: I don't have any money right now.
    Me: Then unfortunately I can't do anything for you.
    SC: BULL! Cut my phone on RIGHT NOW!!
    (I am sensing a trend here...)
    Me: I can't.
    SC: YES YOU CAN!
    Me: NO, I can't.
    SC: YES YOU CAN!
    Me: Sorry, I can't.
    SC: GRRRRR, this is an emergency, why can't someone help me???
    Me: If the situation is serious enough you can call 911, if not there are other options to get help. You can flag someone down or walk to a gas station or...
    SC: or you could CUT MY PHONE ON!
    Me: (I was SO tempted to respond: "Or I could leave it off until you pay your bill" but I didn't) Actually, we've been over this. I can't.
    SC: Then find me someone who can.
    Me: I'm not sure anyone will be able to.
    SC: JUST GET ME A MANAGER!

    At that point my supervisor took over, went around and around with her again a few times and then she gave up.

    This lady seemed more agitated her phone was turned off than anything else, I seriously doubt she was in any kind of imminent danger.
    "If we refund your money, give you a free replacement and shoot the manager, then will you be happy?" - sign seen in a restaurant
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Ugh. I really don't miss selling cell phones. Sucky cell phone customers have their own special blend of entitlement.
    I may be free from retail, but the nightmares still linger.....

    Comment

    • #3
      Soooooooo...... If she was currently in the middle of an emergency and needed to make a phone call for help...how was she calling you guys to bitch?

      Comment

      • #4
        Quoth Amina516 View Post
        Soooooooo...... If she was currently in the middle of an emergency and needed to make a phone call for help...how was she calling you guys to bitch?
        I believe some phones will allow a call to the service provider.
        "Sigh, I'm going to Hell.....but I'm going with a smile on my face." -- Gravekeeper

        Comment

        • #5
          Quoth Mike Taylor View Post
          I believe some phones will allow a call to the service provider.
          It's possible. I know with our land line phone, if it becomes disconnected, Mom can still call Blue Ball Phone Customer Service.

          Wouldn't know about my wireless one . . . Blue Ball Wireless hasn't shut it off once since I've had it.
          Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

          Comment

          • #6
            If memory serves me right most cell phones these days, even if not connected to or contracted with a cell provider can be used to call 911.

            I could be wrong of course.
            I'm lost without a paddle and headed up SH*T creek.
            -- Life Sucks Then You Die.

            "I'll believe corp. are people when Texas executes one."

            Comment

            • #7
              I thought they all could as long as there was any charge on the battery. You don't even need a SIM card, which is the reason that the emergency services get so many calls on Christmas day - from new phone owners whose service is not yet up and running.
              "Bring me knitting!" (The Doctor - not the one you were expecting)

              Comment

              • #8
                Emergency = Someone/thing on fire OR Someone not breathing/redecorating the room in a delicate new colour called 'hint of hemoglobin' OR someone has invited themselves into your house via a window at 2am.

                Not being able to call for a booty call =/= an emergency.
                A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

                Comment

                • #9
                  that's because most times the "emergency" is that they want to talk for free.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    "CUT my phone ON"

                    Interesting syntax there.
                    Suckiness is reinforced up OR down at every transaction. Accepting BS makes them worse for all of us; firm fairness trains them to suck less.

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Quoth crazylegs View Post
                      Not being able to call for a booty call =/= an emergency.
                      We're gonna have to agree to disagree here.

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Quoth CrazedClerkthe2nd View Post
                        Me: NO, I can't.
                        SC: YES YOU CAN!
                        ~ No, I can't ~
                        ~ Yes you can ~
                        ~ No, I can't ~
                        ~ Yes you can ~
                        ~ No, I can't ~
                        ~ Yes you can YES YOU CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!! ~
                        "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                        "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                        "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                        "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                        "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                        "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                        Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                        "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          With these customers who keep repeating themselves, do you ever get tempted to say "Wabbit season!" ?

                          Duck Season.
                          Wabbit Season.
                          Duck Season.
                          Wabbit Season.
                          Duck Season!
                          Wabbit Season!
                          Seshat's self-help guide:
                          1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
                          2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                          3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                          4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

                          "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Quoth Seshat View Post
                            With these customers who keep repeating themselves, do you ever get tempted to say "Wabbit season!" ?

                            Duck Season.
                            Wabbit Season.
                            Duck Season.
                            Wabbit Season.
                            Duck Season!
                            Wabbit Season!
                            Wabbit Season!
                            PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                            There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Quoth Seshat View Post
                              ...
                              Wabbit Season!
                              <sign> Elmer Season
                              Elmer: Uh-oh...
                              *Daffy & Bugs grin*
                              "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                              "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                              "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                              "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                              "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                              "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                              Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                              "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                              Comment

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