For IT security, ganging up with the data protection people is fun.
For this recipe, you will need:
2 evil bastards, 1 BOFH flavour, 1 security flavour.
1 numpty, any brand will do, but sales types are often the easiest to bait.
1 spare laptop, containing every app the numpty will need, pre-installed.
1 understanding boss, primed and ready to defend.
*When numpty reports a laptop problem, offer to come right over to look.
*Take your spare laptop to their desk, ask them to log in here to check their account is OK.
*When logged in, drop spare on desk, pick up "their" laptop and prepare to make off.
*At this point, you should hear a whining noise, complaining about "their" stuff, which, if you whip them up into a foam, they will claim is absolutely essential to the business, nay life itself.
*Add two drops of liquid smug, and ask why such "essential" stuff is kept on this laptop not in the places it is supposed to be kept, namely the CRM/content store/whatever you have, and has no backup, no resilience, no failsafe. USB sticks don't count as they will keep that in the same bag as the laptop...
*Whatever excuse is offered, ask when that was reported, signed off and approved, and by who, since they are now responsible for the problem.
*Offer to garnish their explanation to the risk/compliance/line manager, adding that if the laptop was stolen not broken, they'd have been up the creek royally, and they now have a working laptop.
*Leave to stew for the time it takes to fix the laptop.
SERVED.
This only really works in big companies, when your boss has your back, preferably after numpty's boss has been told about the problem, and inevitably has told IT (you) to fix it.
It's also only worked once, as word spreads fast. But it's fun.
For this recipe, you will need:
2 evil bastards, 1 BOFH flavour, 1 security flavour.
1 numpty, any brand will do, but sales types are often the easiest to bait.
1 spare laptop, containing every app the numpty will need, pre-installed.
1 understanding boss, primed and ready to defend.
*When numpty reports a laptop problem, offer to come right over to look.
*Take your spare laptop to their desk, ask them to log in here to check their account is OK.
*When logged in, drop spare on desk, pick up "their" laptop and prepare to make off.
*At this point, you should hear a whining noise, complaining about "their" stuff, which, if you whip them up into a foam, they will claim is absolutely essential to the business, nay life itself.
*Add two drops of liquid smug, and ask why such "essential" stuff is kept on this laptop not in the places it is supposed to be kept, namely the CRM/content store/whatever you have, and has no backup, no resilience, no failsafe. USB sticks don't count as they will keep that in the same bag as the laptop...
*Whatever excuse is offered, ask when that was reported, signed off and approved, and by who, since they are now responsible for the problem.
*Offer to garnish their explanation to the risk/compliance/line manager, adding that if the laptop was stolen not broken, they'd have been up the creek royally, and they now have a working laptop.
*Leave to stew for the time it takes to fix the laptop.
SERVED.
This only really works in big companies, when your boss has your back, preferably after numpty's boss has been told about the problem, and inevitably has told IT (you) to fix it.
It's also only worked once, as word spreads fast. But it's fun.
Comment