CD Drive Is Upside Down

[DGoddessChardonnay]

I laughed about that one for quite some time . . . how can someone think their monitor is the entire computer?!

Phoenix

The Gateway Astro was like the IMac in the sense that it had everything built in.

I almost bought one several years ago when I bought my now retired Gateway computer, but instead went w/a midtower b/c of the larger hard drive capacity.

[Aressel]

Modem-----------------Router (OK, I can see how this one can be confuded with the average (l)user

This one is actually rather reasonable around here, as one of the major ISPs is now sending out combination ADSL modem/wireless routers with their highspeed packages.

[ken]

Nonono, you've got it wrong!
That big box thar is the modem, a cuz I iz usin' that to get on them thar intarwebs!

Some years ago, I tried to get a user to reveal to me if he was using a
Windows PC or a Mac. That piece of information would have made it
easier for me to help him find his IP address, which I needed. He
had no idea.

Not wanting that user to delve into advanced concepts yet,
like interacting with the OS or trying to describe the stuff on the desktop
to me, I asked him if there was any label on his computer.

"Yes, the computer is called 'SyncMaster'!"

Well, that answered the question at that time. Windows PC.

Now, on to the mysteries of ipconfig, winipcfg or chasing network icons on the
Desktop :-)

[Polenicus]

One word - Imac

Hey hey hey!

They were stupid before we got here! If it wasn't for us they'd just find other ways of being confused. Like trying to fax by holding a piece of paper to their monitor so it can 'scan' it.

[technical.angel]

Last year, we had to yank a misbehaving computer from an office, and there wasn't anyone to tell at the time. We left a note for the person in charge of that area, and figured there wouldn't be any problems.

A while later, she calls and asks if we took a modem. Um... no. There was a lot of extraneous parts that we took, that she said we should, but there wasn't a modem. After a while of going back and forth, I finally realized she was talking about the tower.

It was the first time I've ever heard of a computer being called a modem.

[draggar]

*Yes, I hate it when people call their computer case the CPU. Don't you?

What they say ----- What they mean
Computer-------------Monitor
Computer-------------Keyboard (I haven't seen that since my C=64)
Computer-------------Printer (yes, I've seen it)
Motherboard---------Computer
Processor-------------Computer
Video Card------------Computer
Modem-----------------Computer
CPU---------------------Computer
Power Supply---------Computer
Clicker------------------Mouse
Modem-----------------Router (OK, I can see how this one can be confuded with the average (l)user

[Kilamon]

One word - Imac

or, for some others, VT100 Dec Terminals.

[MadMike]

I laughed about that one for quite some time . . . how can someone think their monitor is the entire computer?!

Ask my wife, although I'm not sure she'd answer you.

Back when she was just starting to use the computer, the thing locked up on her for no apparent reason, as they sometimes do, especially in the Win 9x days. She called me on my cell, freaking out.

Her: "Oh my god! I broke your computer! I'm so sorry!"

Me: "Calm down, I'm sure you didn't break it. What's going on?"

Her: "The thing just froze! I'm pressing keys, and moving the mouse, and nothing's happening!"

Me: "It's OK, it just locked up. Those things happen sometimes. Just press the reset button. It's right above the power button."

Her: "I don't see it!"

Me: "The power button is the big button at the bottom. The reset button is the little button right above it."

Her: "What do you mean right above it? I only see the one button!"

(slight pause)

Me: "Are you looking on the monitor?"

Her, in a relieved, yet annoyed and embarrassed tone: "Yes. OK, I see it now. OK, it's starting back up. It looks like it's OK now."

[Banrion]

I laughed about that one for quite some time . . . how can someone think their monitor is the entire computer?!

Phoenix

One word - Imac

[Phoenix79]

This thread reminds me of the time I had a lady call in when I was working in customer service at Gateway who said her computer wouldn't turn on. She just got the computer . . . so I pulled up her order . . . and saw that she hadn't recieved the actual tower (backordered), and only the monitor was delivered to her.

"Ma'am, you're computer is still on the way. What you have at home is just your monitor."

"I thought that was my computer, why won't it show a picture?"

"Because you need the computer tower, keyboard, mouse, and speakers to get it to show a picture first, Ma'am."

"OOoooooo, okay, thank you!" click

I laughed about that one for quite some time . . . how can someone think their monitor is the entire computer?!

Phoenix

[technical.angel]

I sometimes call it 'the box' or 'the main box'.

From my CDW calendar: (Picture of a guy standing in a cardboard box) "Upon receiving an empty shipping carton from a client, Rick realized his habit of calling a computer a "box" had finally caught up to him."

I usually refer to it as a tower. For the more ditzy of my callers, I refer to it as the box that all the cables plug into.

[Shabo]

The sad thing is you will pay more for that P3 then you would if you went out and bought a new Core 2 Duo.

[Polenicus]

Nonono, you've got it wrong!

That big box thar is the modem, a cuz I iz usin' that to get on them thar intarwebs!

Seriously? Work in phone tech support for an ISP. Better yet, a dial-up ISP. The users use just about every term possible for the computer except one that makes sense such as 'computer', 'tower' or even 'CPU'.

Here's some of the best:

Hard Disk
Modem
Fan
Power Box
Disk Drive
The Intel
The Windows
The Celeron 4.66 GHz... (Yadda yadda yadda, reading off whatever happens to be on the front under their eyes... including the windows license sticker)
The Desktop
The Power Button
The MacIntel (VERY confused user here)

That's just what I can remember. I'm sure someone currently working in the field has lots more to contribute.

[jb17kx]

or two chips, if you have a very fancy dual-CPU system

Or, if it's very clever, it will have two in one... Unfortunatley, telling people that you have a "Centrino Duo 1.8GHz" (and yes, I know Centrino also refers to the chipset) isn't near as impressive as "Pentium 4 3.8GHz".

Or sometimes it can be lots of chips in a big brick - a la the Slot 1 SECC cartridge Intel experimented with in the late '90s. I still have a Pentium II MMX 400MHz around here somewhere, someplete with hologram sticker, and I'm still looking for a 1GHz Pentium III in Slot 1. Very hard to come by.

Ahh. Tech jargon.

[Seshat]

I sometimes call it 'the box' or 'the main box'. The CPU is actually a single chip (or two chips, if you have a very fancy dual-CPU system), that was clipped to the motherboard and then topped with a fan during assembly.

I buy my machines in bits. My box is:

A case (the exterior of the box, usually with power supply and lights included)
A power supply (bought with the case) (comes with the big fans)
A motherboard (if you ever open the case, the motherboard is the big board that stands vertically in your case) (or horizontally, if you have a lying-on-the-long-side case)
A CPU (clipped to the motherboard)
A CPU fan (clipped to the CPU, or to the motherboard, depending on design)
RAM (several chips, also clipped to the motherboard)
Hard drive and DVD drive, attached to the motherboard with a cable, to the power supply with more cables, and screwed into mountings in the case.

And some daughterboards, also known as cards: these are smaller boards that plug in at 90o to the motherboard.
A video card (usually comes with another fan these days)
A sound card
An ethernet card (if the motherboard didn't have it built in)

There are also cables that attach to the motherboard from the case, to make the switches and lights work. And sometimes the video and sound cards need power from the power supply, so they get cabled to it too.

And all of that is going on inside 'the box', before you even look at keyboards and mice and monitors. Fun, huh?