Sir, I believe that is a request, not a fault...

[sonny100]

Howdy, this is my first post so I thought i'd share the story of a classic call that I received last month:

Me: Me
Cusomer: CS

CS: Hi there, I need to log a fault with my keyboard
ME: Ok Sir, what seems to be the problem with it?
CS: Well, it's white.
ME: I'm sorry sir??
CS: It's white, and the light above me is reflecting off of the keys and I can't see them properly. I need a black one.
ME: Erm, i'm sorry sir but that isn't a fault with the keyboard. If you would like to order a new keyboard, you will need to speak to the Service Request Desk on Option 6.
CS: (clearly p!ssed that I won't/can't order him a new one) What?? That's absolutely ridiculous!! Of course it's a fault, I can't see the keys!! How can you say that this is not a fault with the keyboard!
ME: Because the keyboard is working perfectly ok. If you would like a new keyboard, you will need to speak to the service request desk and fill in a SRD form. Alternatively...
CS: Yes??!
ME: You could speak to Facilities in your building and ask them to install a lower wattage bulb..?
CS: Goodbye.

[IT Grunt]

Oh, I deal with this one daily. We have a similar system. A help desk for break/fix calls, and a service request system for everything else. I've had people call in break/fix tickets because their network cord is too short (after they re-arranged their office), a program isn't on their desktop (they never had it before, the person next to them did), etc. I have similar arguements about it no longer working, and/or it's supposed to be there, so it's broken! The funny part is if they had put in the right request instead of calling me to bitch and moan, it would have been done already.