Mr. Untechnology

[Meadhands]

I got a guy that comes to my labs alot that I will call Mr. Untechnology. Why do I call him that? Because technology is supposed to help people and make things easier... but everything he uses always seems to do the exact opposite. He sucks the technological abilities of hardware right out of them, making them untechnology for as long as he is in their presence.

Seriously, I think it is his X-men mutant power.

Anywho, Mr. Untechnology is quite unlucky. During this semester alone, he has brought in and used, and subsequently had us examine, two U3 USB flash drives and an external hard drive, all brought in because he couldn't get it's predecessor to work (the geneological root to this unfortunate family being that his FTP couldn't be accessed from home.)

Just so you know, U3 drives are a pain in the ass when it comes right down to it. They require a special software that is installed in the drive to function, but our computers do not allow that functionality to play out. You can delete that software, making the U3 drive just a plain old (but more expensive) flash drive. And once deleted, you cannot reinstall said software.

Like I said, a pain in the ass.

Then his external hard drive wouldn't read. So we decided to look it up for him on the internet. It turns out that it happens to be a common problem with this drive, and to fix it you need to do administrator-level registry editing. Oh joy. He picked a winner.

Now, I would never call Mr. Unfortunate a sucky customer... at least, not by the standard definition. He is a very nice man who is always patient and smiling and isn't bothered by all these the happenstance. However, every time there is a problem with his computer, which there always is, we have to test the thing thoroughly to make sure it was just the one time. For example, today he couldn't use the scanner because it simply wasn't responding to him. We do not know why. Once he left, however, it was working fine... but that doesn't excuse me from the battery of tests I will now have to perform on it to ensure it's functionality.

Why must technology hate him, and the Pantheon hate me?

[Andara Bledin]

Why must technology hate him, and the Pantheon hate me?

Personal electrical fields.

We all have them, and some of them just do not mix with technology.

^-.-^

[earl colby pottinger]

Sorry!

Why must technology hate him, and the Pantheon hate me?

To me he reads as too lazy to read manuals and too cheap to buy proper hardware.

[Umingmaq]

Many years ago in a career far away I had virtually unlimited access to a room full of the most advanced computers of the time. (I won't tell you what they were - you'd either just laugh or sit there with blank looks on your faces, saying "Wha?".) One of them would routinely refuse to function whenever I tried to use it. There was no pattern, it just hated me.

The scary thing was that this was a machine type that had been specifically built for the air traffic control system, and it's brethren were happily keeping flying objects separated and safe all over the country. I flew often in those days, but never went near the FAA areas.

[Meadhands]

Many years ago in a career far away I had virtually unlimited access to a room full of the most advanced computers of the time. (I won't tell you what they were - you'd either just laugh or sit there with blank looks on your faces, saying "Wha?".)

I dunno... you may be surprised how much 'history' is taught in computer classes these days. Though, I guess if you tell me you were using something along the technological lines of ENIAC, then yes, I would be surprised.

[Umingmaq]

I dunno... you may be surprised how much 'history' is taught in computer classes these days. Though, I guess if you tell me you were using something along the technological lines of ENIAC, then yes, I would be surprised.

Close though. I operated, but never programmed, an IBM 650. Rotating drum storage. Started programming on IBM 1401 and 7070 commercial machines. You could put your ear next to the 1401 and hear the core memory rustle as it shifted on the wires.

The machine in my original post was, IIRC, an IBM 360 model 55.

Far back enough for you? The 'Geezer' for my job title isn't an exaggeration.

[Meadhands]

Close though. I operated, but never programmed, an IBM 650. Rotating drum storage. Started programming on IBM 1401 and 7070 commercial machines. You could put your ear next to the 1401 and hear the core memory rustle as it shifted on the wires.

The machine in my original post was, IIRC, an IBM 360 model 55.

Far back enough for you? The 'Geezer' for my job title isn't an exaggeration.

I tip my hat to you, compu-geezer. I think this makes you the person I have met with the longest history of computer work under their belt. Much respect. I just hope you stay current.

[Umingmaq]

I tip my hat to you, compu-geezer. I think this makes you the person I have met with the longest history of computer work under their belt. Much respect. I just hope you stay current.

Hey, I didn't even get into hard-wiring boards for punch card accounting machines (407 and 408), or my first awed sighting of an actual disk drive RAMAC) or how my use of an 'internet' considerably predates DARPA and the actual Internet...

I don't actually think much about all that stuff, but this has been an interesting mini-trip for me back into my past. I was pretty much just a low level peon for most of it, but I was there. As for staying current, no, not really. I use the computer as a tool and don't delve much into the guts any more. I've played with enough HTML to know what's going on there, but most of my computer time is spent like this, or with applications such as Photoshop. (Now there's an app that can suck up major amounts of learning time.) As I've said elsewhere on this board, all that my computing history really means is the I know/knew a lot of obsolete stuff.

[Bliss]

core memory makes me wet

[Umingmaq]

core memory makes me wet

Unfortunately it never had that effect on me.

Now if I were half the dirty old man I aspire to be I'd offer to help you with your problem/condition. But I'm not, (yet), so enjoy...

[Nimisha]

Personal electrical fields.

We all have them, and some of them just do not mix with technology.

^-.-^

*sigh* I think I have one of those. I've given up on laptops after my last one caught fire. Had a camera/mp3 player once that turned into a paper weight after plugging it into my computer. My mom is a electronics technision and confirmed that it was dead, wasn't just a simple problem.

Luckily I have enough computer knowledge that I can fix most errors caused by my meer presence, but its a very annoying problem for someone as attached to technology as me.

(please excuse the spelling errors. On painkillers for gallstones)

[Samaliel]

My sincerest sympathies. I don't know how people don't go insane when they're technopathic without being technophobic.

[mharbourgirl]

My sincerest sympathies. I don't know how people don't go insane when they're technopathic without being technophobic.

I have to laugh at anyone who thinks I HAVEN'T gone insane.

I have a very strong personal electro-magnetic field. I am not permitted within 3 meters of any radio receiver that isn't heavily shielded, because I create horrid white noise if I do. The hubster, on the other hand, makes radios work BETTER when he gets close.

I don't screw up door-knobs or simple machines, but the more complex they get, the trickier the situation can become. Cars like me. Well, most of them. Volkswagens are allergic to me or something. :P Computers... for the most part, never have a problem. I think any computer I use likes me, because I can sit down at a machine that other people have issues with and never have a problem.

Then we come to what I call 'the perversity of the inanimate'. I really do believe that the more complex a machine, the closer it is to semi-sentience. Photocopiers are my nemesis, but only certain brands. Ricohs and Canons love me. Xerox... the company has fantastic service, and there's a reason for that. I have never used a Xerox multi-function machine that didn't fuck up in a myriad of incomprehensible ways. I used to work with one that would just start accordionating paper out of the blue. So I'd call the service center, they'd send someone out to take the machine apart and check it all over. And find nothing wrong. It got to the point where all I'd have to do is walk into the room when the machine is acting up, say loudly 'Guess I'd better call Xerox then', and IT WOULD STOP DOING IT and go back to being a normal copier.

And don't get me started on handheld game systems.