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  • Support Yourselves, Idiots

    Ok, this story goes out to anyone in tech support who's had to deal with complete pricks.

    ME: Elevator
    SC: fucking prick

    ME: Thanks for calling *company* this is Elevator can I help you?
    SC: I'd like a TV that works.
    ME: *eye roll* Sir could you more accurately describe the problem?
    SC: It's all snowy, my TV picture is snowy. I don't get it. Every time I go anywhere and come back, my picture is gone or something is fucked up with your service.
    ME: Sir, there's no need for that language.
    SC: Yes there is! Your TV service is disgusting. Just disgusting.
    ME: Sir do you have any lights on your set top box?
    SC: No, there ain't no lights, nothin!
    ME: Sir it sounds like your power supply is out, we'll go ahead and send this ticket to dispatch to have a tech come out there. Are you available the rest of today and tomorrow?
    SC: I know how it goes, you're gonna send it up and it'll be a damn week before a service man comes out here, and me and my wife work so we're not gonna be home most of the day, so we're gonna be without TV for weeks at a time because your bullshit company doesn't have it together.
    ME: *trying so hard not to freak out* Sir, I'm just telling you this is what I can do, I'll send it up and the dispatch office will take it from there.
    SC: All my neighbors switched months ago because of how lousy your service is. I shoulda done it too. Your service is horrible, HORRIBLE. I'm gonna call dish network up, this is complete garbage.
    ME: *head nearing explosion point* Sir, I apologize for the-
    SC: Just forget it. Forget it!

    *click*

    I did the nice thing and escalated the issue to the dispatch to send out a service tech for the guy. But I hope the tech doesn't go. I hope they delete the issue. I hope this guy's balls rot off.

    People like this deserve to have zero technology in their home. They signed up for the service, they're paying for the service, when it doesn't work, yes it is a massive inconvenience, but life goes on. I told him I'd do my best for him which is what I did, he'll be getting his problem fixed. But when customers call tech support and chew us out for their service being problematic, I DON'T GIVE A SHIT.

    Shut the fuck up, please! Customer service deals with that shit, and boy do I feel sorry for them, but negativity over the phone helps noone. It may help you feel better, but it makes you look like an asshole and reduces the quality of service. Nobody wants to service some uptight prick who can't deal with the fact that he/she is not special. YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER CUSTOMER WITH ANOTHER PROBLEM. GET IN LINE, SHUT THE HELL UP.

    There are so many great lenghts people in this company and companies like mine go through to cater to shitheads that make threats, use coarse language, and belittle employees to keep these pieces of crap paying. I really hope that there is some company out there that is willing to provide a quality service to quality people. If I owned a company and a jerk like that called in so disgusted, I'd rip up his account and tell him to take his business somewhere else.

    So for anyone who has to deal with assholes, bitches, lazy pricks, loudmouths, old dumbasses, redneck dipshits, and anyother type of human piece of crap that can pick up a phone, I raise my glass to you all. Here's to keeping your head up despite a world full of assholes.
    The only thing great about working tech support is that it's not customer service.

  • #2
    My, that's quite a potty mouth you have there.
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

    Comment


    • #3
      Quoth Evil Queen View Post
      My, that's quite a potty mouth you have there.
      Indeed, I apologize for the vulgarity and profanity, but I was extremely upset when I wrote that. Have to take it with a grain of salt.
      The only thing great about working tech support is that it's not customer service.

      Comment


      • #4
        It happens to everyone. Even me. I'm a major hot head.

        I tend to take a step back, take a 10-minute "time out" to fantasize about poetic justice and then post. It helps.
        Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

        Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

        Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

        Comment


        • #5
          You don't set at least a certain arrival window? I guess dispatch actually calls people to schedule? Or did you cut that part for brevity?

          ...If I had a dispatch-required issue and the caller hung up before I could discuss scheduling with them, guess what would happen. Go on, guess!
          Supporting the idiots charged with protecting your personal information.

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth otakuneko View Post

            ...If I had a dispatch-required issue and the caller hung up before I could discuss scheduling with them, guess what would happen. Go on, guess!
            I am guessing you would diligently note the account required some form of service, and a disconnect occured before you were able to fully establish the issue, and the best time for a tech to visit this customer. Therefore, customer service should call the customer back at their earliest convenience to ascertain what actions should be taken next.
            Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

            http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

            Comment


            • #7
              Dammit, I swear that's the last time I buy a cheap made in china sarcasmometer.
              Supporting the idiots charged with protecting your personal information.

              Comment


              • #8
                My, that's quite a potty mouth you have there.
                You know you swear too much when you read EQ's comment and think to yourself, "What potty mouth?"

                ... yeah... kinda silly of the guy... he calls and complains but doesn't actually want you to fix it... so i guess he doesn't want the service afterall then eh? :eyeroll:

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth PepperElf View Post
                  You know you swear too much when you read EQ's comment and think to yourself, "What potty mouth?"


                  That's okay, I swear a lot too. I just curb it when I'm on the forums.
                  Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

                  Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

                  Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    i can honestly say ... a male sailor told me to watch my language.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth PepperElf View Post
                      i can honestly say ... a male sailor told me to watch my language.
                      Even worse... I made a Navy friend blush. Apparently a girl learing to curse from a UPer when she used to be a good lil Pentecostal girl is an interesting combination. Hehehehe. Just means that I can curse AND quote Bible verses and Christian songs
                      "Hi, this is Silver. How may I lose my self respect in order to cater to your over- inflated ego today?" --- Silverrb

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I get customers like that a lot.

                        I bet his STB wasn't even plugged in!

                        I had a customer today about her DSL not working. She was angry that she couldn't watch her videos on both of her computers. Well her modem was on but nothing was working after she said she power cycled it. I asked if she plugged in the router and she replied "No, I was waiting for the DSL to start working".

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I wouldn't consider not having cable for a day a "major inconvenience." I consider that a "Get the fuck over it and be patient, you're not going to die without it."
                          Would you like a Stummies?

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