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Owning a Unix Administrator
So, I work in the data center for a chain of book stores, on the night shift. Because the retail market is...well...volatile right now, we've lost some of our best administrators, leaving others with questionable skills to take their place.
Background in place, allow me to tell you the story of how I owned a Unix Admin the other night.
We had called an application support person to explain that a job was running far too long on a server, hereafter referred to as "UNIX01". Application support suggested that we reboot the entire server. As required, we called the Unix Admin to ensure this was ok with them, and they agreed.
So, off Bobsentme goes with documentation in hand, to login to the server, shut everything down properly, reboot, and bring it all back up. This is no easy task on any server, but "UNIX01" is known to give many people in the data center problems (particular when not all the steps are followed correctly). Luckily, Bobsentme is a smart guy, and was able to run through the instructions without a problem.
As requested by the Unix Administrator, I called them back once the system was up and running as a courtesy.
The following conversation ensued:
Admin: "You couldn't have brought it down that fast. I just checked, everything is still running!!!"
Me: "I did, and everything is running because the system is back up."
Admin: "Well, how do I know you shut the system down?"
At this point, I am beyond annoyed with this admin, and actually getting angry. Not only has this person questioned my abilities, but is now calling me liar. So I take a deep breath and continue.
Me: "Type u...p...t...i...m...e...at the prompt."
Admin: "What's this command do?"
My brain disengaged. It let my mouth run before I could stop it, causing me to reply:
Me: "Shows I'm better than you."
The rest of the call was downhill from there, but at least now this Unix Admin knows I'm not just some person manning the phones in the data center.
Background in place, allow me to tell you the story of how I owned a Unix Admin the other night.
We had called an application support person to explain that a job was running far too long on a server, hereafter referred to as "UNIX01". Application support suggested that we reboot the entire server. As required, we called the Unix Admin to ensure this was ok with them, and they agreed.
So, off Bobsentme goes with documentation in hand, to login to the server, shut everything down properly, reboot, and bring it all back up. This is no easy task on any server, but "UNIX01" is known to give many people in the data center problems (particular when not all the steps are followed correctly). Luckily, Bobsentme is a smart guy, and was able to run through the instructions without a problem.
As requested by the Unix Administrator, I called them back once the system was up and running as a courtesy.
The following conversation ensued:
Admin: "You couldn't have brought it down that fast. I just checked, everything is still running!!!"
Me: "I did, and everything is running because the system is back up."
Admin: "Well, how do I know you shut the system down?"
At this point, I am beyond annoyed with this admin, and actually getting angry. Not only has this person questioned my abilities, but is now calling me liar. So I take a deep breath and continue.
Me: "Type u...p...t...i...m...e...at the prompt."
Admin: "What's this command do?"
My brain disengaged. It let my mouth run before I could stop it, causing me to reply:
Me: "Shows I'm better than you."
The rest of the call was downhill from there, but at least now this Unix Admin knows I'm not just some person manning the phones in the data center.
Any UNIX administrator who doesn't know this command needs to have all access privileges revoked retroactively. This is one of the most basic commands you can possibly learn.
I AM the evil bastard!
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