You Know You Drive A Junker When...

[Argabarga]

I do not own a junker, I prefer to call it a "rolling project"

[Ironclad Alibi]

(Sadly, this isn't a junker it's a 2013 with less then 40k miles)

A junker is determined by its state of being, not its age.

[protege]

...when my 1959 Radio-Flyer "station wagon" can outrun your car from a dead stop.

[Rosco the Iroc]

When your car doesn't show up on radar because it's more bondo then metal.

When you drag race they use a sun dial instead of an stop watch.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

'Nother relevant song:

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I AGREE

[drunkenwildmage]

You Know You Drive A Junker When...


....You know the exact spot on your dashnboard to hit with your fist to get the heater fan to come on.


(Sadly, this isn't a junker it's a 2013 with less then 40k miles)

[Ironclad Alibi]

And here is another relevant song:

Classified

[dendawg]

Relevant songs for this thread:

https://youtu.be/aeZ0BUc3kMw?t=54s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBl91FfyO7A

[Ironclad Alibi]

...This time, I used a square cut from a stop sign

I always wondered how that stop sign acquired that square hole.

You might drive a junker if no two body panels are the same color.

[protege]

...when there's the bottom of a bean can being used as a repair panel.

Seriously, I had some crackhead try to force my trunk open some years ago. He failed, but succeeded in ripping the latch staple out of the panel it was bolted to. Over repeated opening/closing the lid, the staple eventually came out...causing the lid to bounce all over the place. Only thing holding it somewhat closed, were the wires for the light switch. Dealership wanted a grand to fix it, so I told them what they could do with themselves. Since I had the bean can sitting in the trash, I thought "why not." Drilled a few holes, bolted it into place, covered the bare metal with some cheap purple spray paint, etc. and drove around a bit before I could do it properly. This time, I used a square cut from a stop sign

[Ironclad Alibi]

You have to check your gas level with a dipstick.

[csquared]

When you have to add two quarts of oil just to get it to the dealership to trade it in.

Then you stall the negotiations so that the engine can cool down before they take it for a test drive.

[Bandit]

When you don't have any space in the trunk for luggage because it's filled with at least one bottle of every fluid the car uses....

[taxguykarl]

the dome light comes on.

and never goes off.

[drunkenwildmage]

When you push in the Cigarette lighter and the dome light comes on.