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A letter for my ex, what do you guys think? (epic)
As many of you read in the "Very, very, bad taste" thread. I am none too happy with my son's father right now. This is a letter I am considering emailing him, not because I think it'll do a real lick of good, but because I don't want him to say I never told him anything was wrong. Let me know what you think, please.
I know I said I was okay about you trolling the net for a new girl, but in fact, I am anything but. I’m not sad over it, I am extremely angry by it. Right now my feelings on the subject are how can you afford to court someone when you owe both your children $4,000 apiece? How are you going to convince the new girl not to feel threatened by seeing your ex everyday? Or should we discuss a permanent visitation schedule? You broke my heart twice and you have the nerve to say you’re glad I’m “out there”. What a joke. After all the emotional bullshit you’ve put me through, it’s all I can do to try and keep my head on straight, and that’s with 2 medications and a therapist!
I can hear you saying now, “what emotional bullshit?”
You didn’t tell me you were still legally married until after you had sex with me.
You picked up divorce papers to file in May of 2005, and never filed them despite saying you would. You let your ex do it for you in December, despite knowing how I felt about the situation.
Every time I do anything you don’t like, you accuse me of being like your awful ex-wife.
When you feel slighted you don’t discuss it, you storm off, like a child.
You led me to believe we were back together prior to me getting pregnant.
You led me to believe we were back together while I was pregnant.
You led me to believe we were back together shortly after I gave you a beautiful son.
While I was pregnant, you deducted everything you bought for OUR child from my child support.
While I was pregnant, when my gas was being threatened to be cut off, instead of just loaning me, or god forbid, giving me the money, you had me clean your home so I would feel I earned it. Then you argued with me over how much you owed me when it was done.
You quit your job in 2007 without discussing it with me, without finding a new job first, and without care for the fact you had a 4 month old son as well as an 11 year old son. Those things were deemed less important than the fact you were unhappy at Breault.
These are some of the things my mother thinks about while you wonder why she doesn’t like you.
You don’t seem to realize that since it was made painfully clear to me several months ago that there was no future between us, once the child support stopped I was under no obligation to let you see your son, let alone see him everyday. You see Nelson as often as you do by my good graces, because I believed it was important for Nelson. Now I’m not so sure you really set a good example for him at all. Now I understand why Jay took off to Dallas, and I find myself almost wishing I could do the same thing.
You will do exactly what you want, as you have nobody to answer to, but in my opinion that dating profile drove home for me how selfish you really are. Your desires trump all. However, what really burns me up and makes me even more bitter than I was toward men and relationships, is the fact that because you have so few responsibilities it will undoubtedly make it much easier for you to find someone new. When I am finally ready to try and trust someone with my heart again, I am going to have to do things like worry about child care, not to mention find a man who is willing to take on the burden of a small child as well as a girlfriend. I will have to balance my time between Nelson and someone else without making either feel cheated with my time. You will only need to worry about that on weekends, or whenever you’re slated to see Nelson, just as you had to do in regards to Charlie when you were dating me.
I think you should stay away from me for awhile and let me have some time with myself and really figure out exactly what I want. Please don’t call me, I will give Nelson hugs on your behalf for a few days.
Thank you so much for giving me such a wonderful, beautiful, truly awesome son. For that I will always be grateful, but as for the rest of it, I’m done.
What do you think, should I send it?
I know I said I was okay about you trolling the net for a new girl, but in fact, I am anything but. I’m not sad over it, I am extremely angry by it. Right now my feelings on the subject are how can you afford to court someone when you owe both your children $4,000 apiece? How are you going to convince the new girl not to feel threatened by seeing your ex everyday? Or should we discuss a permanent visitation schedule? You broke my heart twice and you have the nerve to say you’re glad I’m “out there”. What a joke. After all the emotional bullshit you’ve put me through, it’s all I can do to try and keep my head on straight, and that’s with 2 medications and a therapist!
I can hear you saying now, “what emotional bullshit?”
You didn’t tell me you were still legally married until after you had sex with me.
You picked up divorce papers to file in May of 2005, and never filed them despite saying you would. You let your ex do it for you in December, despite knowing how I felt about the situation.
Every time I do anything you don’t like, you accuse me of being like your awful ex-wife.
When you feel slighted you don’t discuss it, you storm off, like a child.
You led me to believe we were back together prior to me getting pregnant.
You led me to believe we were back together while I was pregnant.
You led me to believe we were back together shortly after I gave you a beautiful son.
While I was pregnant, you deducted everything you bought for OUR child from my child support.
While I was pregnant, when my gas was being threatened to be cut off, instead of just loaning me, or god forbid, giving me the money, you had me clean your home so I would feel I earned it. Then you argued with me over how much you owed me when it was done.
You quit your job in 2007 without discussing it with me, without finding a new job first, and without care for the fact you had a 4 month old son as well as an 11 year old son. Those things were deemed less important than the fact you were unhappy at Breault.
These are some of the things my mother thinks about while you wonder why she doesn’t like you.
You don’t seem to realize that since it was made painfully clear to me several months ago that there was no future between us, once the child support stopped I was under no obligation to let you see your son, let alone see him everyday. You see Nelson as often as you do by my good graces, because I believed it was important for Nelson. Now I’m not so sure you really set a good example for him at all. Now I understand why Jay took off to Dallas, and I find myself almost wishing I could do the same thing.
You will do exactly what you want, as you have nobody to answer to, but in my opinion that dating profile drove home for me how selfish you really are. Your desires trump all. However, what really burns me up and makes me even more bitter than I was toward men and relationships, is the fact that because you have so few responsibilities it will undoubtedly make it much easier for you to find someone new. When I am finally ready to try and trust someone with my heart again, I am going to have to do things like worry about child care, not to mention find a man who is willing to take on the burden of a small child as well as a girlfriend. I will have to balance my time between Nelson and someone else without making either feel cheated with my time. You will only need to worry about that on weekends, or whenever you’re slated to see Nelson, just as you had to do in regards to Charlie when you were dating me.
I think you should stay away from me for awhile and let me have some time with myself and really figure out exactly what I want. Please don’t call me, I will give Nelson hugs on your behalf for a few days.
Thank you so much for giving me such a wonderful, beautiful, truly awesome son. For that I will always be grateful, but as for the rest of it, I’m done.
What do you think, should I send it?
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