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Ridiculous crap we make foreigners believe...

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  • #61
    Quoth Jpurple View Post
    -not every girl walking past is actually a girl
    Hence the name of the city.

    "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
    Still A Customer."

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    • #62
      Quoth Jester View Post
      I AM a Major in the Conch Republic Army, after all. Magical Services Division. (No, I am not kidding.)
      If I was there and the Republic had problems, I would quickly grab some stale Cuban bread to help out (I don't think I'd be allowed to man a water cannon).

      Quoth Jester View Post
      Newark: just like New York City, only without all the good stuff.
      "Without ALL the good stuff" would insinuate that there is something good in Newark...
      Quote Dalesys:
      ... as in "Ifn thet dawg comes at me, Ima gonna shutz ma panz!"

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      • #63
        Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
        Yep, U-Boats also operated around the Maritimes and NFLD sinking ships. The Japanese even shelled Vancouver Island at one point. We had the 3rd largest navy in the world at the end of WW2. Oddly enough.
        There were also U-boats of the coast of NYC. The wrecks of several are popluar dive destinations.

        Here in New York:

        We all have funny accents (True, but the accents come from all over the world.)

        Everybody knows somebody in organized crime.

        We all go to Broadway shows a lot.

        A Bostonian coming to NYC in a Red Sox cap must be suicidal.

        We all have a cousin in one business or another who can get us discounts.
        Research is the art of reading what everyone has read and seeing what no one else has seen.

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        • #64
          Utah Facts:
          There is a tunnel to England under the temple. (so we can import extra wives)
          Mormons have horns (but they're removed in infancy so we can pass as 'normal')
          Everybody is Mormon... and Republican. (many Mormons are Democrats)
          Nobody's gay... or pagan. (Hi! smileyeagle) (but Jews are Gentiles here)
          You can't buy alcohol or tobacco. (for lotto we go to Idaho)
          I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
          Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
          Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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          • #65
            Quoth draggar View Post
            "Without ALL the good stuff" would insinuate that there is something good in Newark...
            No no no....that refers to all the good stuff that NYC has. Newark is just like New York....without all the good stuff. Get it?


            Quoth dalesys View Post
            but Jews are Gentiles here
            I think you mean "but Jews AND Gentiles are here." Or perhaps not. But of course Jews refer to non-Jews as Gentiles, though I suppose in Mormonville, Jews could be considered to be Gentiles themselves.....

            Ah, hell with it. My brain is already instant hot oatmeal from earlier. Who am I kidding? I am sure you know what you are talking about, even if I can't form a coherent thought!

            "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
            Still A Customer."

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            • #66
              North Cali-
              -Everyone caries a shot gun in their truck (only partly true)
              -Everyone in the small towns are related
              -But we did finish High School!
              -The neighbors are REALLY nice!
              - Well this scar here is from a huntin' accident....


              Spokane (home sweet home now)
              -Don't look the hobos in the eye!
              -Don't worry the city is laid out like a perfect grid, you can't get lost easily
              -Yeah go ahead, you can flag down the cabs! ((honestly guys, don't do this if you come to spokane... they will laugh at you. And laugh hard.))
              -Our weather is a lot like Seattle!
              -Everyone lives on the same street as a Meth Lab.
              -The Diamond parking across from the YMCA never checks their spots. ((I am mean... but too many out of towners want to know where they can just "park my car and ya know not pay" in down town there is NO place like that unless you feel like a long walk.))
              -We are RIGHT next to Seattle ((apparently.. cause that is what everyone who visits up here tells me...))
              -We are all VERY religious. After all we are in the bible belt!
              "I'm not smiling because I'm happy. I'm smiling because every time I blink your head explodes!"
              -Red

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              • #67
                Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
                The Japanese even shelled Vancouver Island at one point.
                Just to completely derail any hope of a coherent conversation, this is apparently debatable. I've been to Estevan Point, and yes, there are interesting holes that a Japanese submarine captain 'confessed' to. However, also having been to Japanese war museums, (The one in Hiroshima was fascinating) the captains and such (not top brass, but not really low down either?) in the Japanese military 'confessed' to many, many things that didn't actually happen.

                Japanese Tourist Myth: The only thing to do in Hiroshima is visit the A-Bomb dome and the peace memorial museum.
                Arsenic is 'natural'. Hemlock is 'organic'.

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                • #68
                  Being from Detroit, I hear some hilarious stuff.

                  Eight mile is where rappers make their name. Complete with a huge temple devoted to Eminem.

                  You so much as set one foot in Detroit you get shot. (Hilarious given that we've hosted a Superbowl, a Ryder Cup, an all-star game, the Stanley Cup finals twice, and an NCAA Final Four tournament recently).

                  We riot when our sports teams win or lose.

                  We know where Eminem lives.

                  Same for Kid Rock.

                  We all listen to Motown.
                  The Grand Galactic Inquisitor hears all and sees all.

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                  • #69
                    Quoth Jester View Post
                    ... though I suppose in Mormonville, Jews could be considered to be Gentiles themselves.....
                    Yep. Traditional Mormon culture considers *all* nons to be Gentiles, leading to that hilarious conundrum.

                    I broke the news gently to my #2-son's GF from Israel...
                    I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                    Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                    Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                    Comment


                    • #70
                      Quoth Lace Neil Singer View Post
                      Nitpicker. XD I should have specified the animated ones; the one that stands out is The Lion King. Yes, Jeremy Irons did a super job as Scar, but it still makes a lot of people think that we're evil.
                      Of course the heroes were played by Americans...
                      ludo ergo sum

                      Comment


                      • #71
                        Oddly enough, I'm not sure what the Ohio stereotypes are.

                        But being on the border of Kentucky and most of us having a slight accent, we get the Kentucky stereotypes attributed to us alot:

                        1. Inbreeding

                        2. Love Mountain Dew, especially as a substitute for coffee in the mornings.

                        3. Park cars in yard and have engines hanging from trees.

                        4. Missing all or part of teeth

                        5. We all know someone that distills moonshine

                        6. Cigarettes cost almost nothing, because there's so many tobacco crops

                        7. Accent means you're stupid and uneducated.


                        Actually, my ex husbands family has several of the above 'qualities' that perpetuate the stereotype. Almost all of them, truthfully. He has some relatives that are 'uncles' on one side and 'cousins' on the other.

                        Forgot to add one for Ohio (Cincinnati):

                        We are all into sensorship, as alluded to in the film "The people vs Larry Flynt". Or, the opposite side of the coin ~ That or the older generation of Cincinnatians know Larry Flynt or that we all hang out at the Hustler stores. Granted, I haven't heard either of these in awhile, but it was really bad when the movie first came out.
                        Last edited by Peppergirl; 06-20-2009, 05:05 PM. Reason: Remembered one for Ohio
                        "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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                        • #72
                          -Almost every living thing in Australia can kill you
                          Although this comes close to the truth most things with more than 4 legs or less than 2 can kill you.
                          If I dropped everybody who occasionally said something stupid from my list of potential partners, I wouldn’t even be able to masturbate

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                          • #73
                            Newfoundland:
                            1)Icebergs are chipped to put in your drinks (Nope, but we do use the water to make Iceberg vodka/rum etc)
                            2) We put fish in EVERYTHING
                            3) Screech is served with every meal- only if you have a cast iron gut and ask for it
                            4) Passports are needed to come (some stores sell passports to Newfoundland as a joke

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                            • #74
                              San Diego

                              - We're all surfers. (I used to be)
                              - We're all gay.
                              - We're all liberal democrats. (San Diego is quite a conservative place)
                              - We're weather wimps (actually this one is very true, a slight drizzle causes panic in the streets )
                              "I don't have an anger problem I have an idiot problem!" - Hank Hill

                              When in deadly danger, when beset by doubt, run around in little circles, wave your arms and shout!

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                              • #75
                                South Dakota

                                - when you cross the border on I-90 you will see a sign that reads 'Welcome to South Dakota - set your watch back 20 years' (still looking for this sign)
                                - cow tipping is a sport (only if you live around Yankton)
                                - yes the capital is pronounced 'Pee-air' (not)
                                - the state animal is a jackalope and they are quite carnivorous (the last researcher is still missing)
                                - we are still at war with the Sioux (depends on who you ask)
                                - we haven't found arrows stuck in an airplane for about a week (my dad had his buddies in the Navy believing this)
                                - the only way to get across the state is by stagecoach (another thing my dad had Navy guys believing)
                                - Sioux Falls is the only large town in the state (lies told by east river people)
                                - you can gamble and find prostitutes in Deadwood (gamble yes - prostitutes maybe)
                                - the Black Hills are only a bunch of black rocks (still trying to figure out where they came up with that one)
                                - the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally is a good place to see outlaw motorcycle gangs (well sort of - they aren't allowed to wear their colors in town)
                                - all pickups have rifles in the gun racks (mainly during hunting season)
                                - everyone is a goatroper -cowboy- (they're everywhere) <runs and hides>
                                Figers are vicious I tell ya. They crawl up your leg and steal your belly button lint.

                                I'm a case study.

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