Tweet
My house and my job are in cahoots. They're trying to KILL ME!!
This has been an...interesting week at work and home. I'm sure I've mentioned before I'm a klutz. If there is no possible way to hurt yourself in a given situation, don't worry! I'll find a way regardless...
Sunday, I managed to pierce my thumb with various accouterments at work not once, but twice. Once was with one of the sizers that we clip on clothing hangers. I was clearing down extra hangers, and had to pull them off, and the plastic sizer snapped on me. Plastic bits embedded in thumb!! Second time occurred when I was cleaning up the buckets we put the hard security tags in. In theory, there's a separate pail for the silver spikes we use to pin the tags to the clothes. In theory. I ended up with one of the spikes driven through the same thumb.
That REALLY hurt!
Then, while unloading a few boxes of clothes to restock the for, I managed to tear some skin off my knuckles. Right at the apex of the bendy part, so whenever I had to bend my fingers the entire day after that, it opened up and started bleeding again. This all happened on Sunday.
Monday, I had class, and came home. Went to the kitchen to attempt to grab a granola bar from the pantry. Cue canned pumpkin falling on my head. Owwww...
Tuesday, I'm back at work. some asshat I work with stacked friggin CALCULUS packages on top of general novels (think the size of mass market paperbacks), then shoved some other largish books in front to keep it balanced. I pulled the largish books for a return and the calculus packages fell on me...from a shelf above my head. I ended up with bruises down my left arm, on my right hand and on my belly from me trying to duck out of the way after the first few packages fell on me.
Tuesday, I also had to shrink wrap some stuff back together. Our machine is kinda old, so the spring mechanism doesn't work as well to hold up the arm. It started to fall, I thrust out my arm to catch it, and realized a split second later that there's a red-fucking-hot wire attached to the arm, and seared a line down MY arm as a result. That kinda hurt, too. To end the day, I scraped a few layers of skin off a few more fingers when I went to grab a four high to restock the floor, but no one had secured the arms to the base, so I try to haul it by the base and the arm slams down into the metal tube where it meets the base (adjustable heights and whatnot), and takes a couple layers of skin off my fingers while it's at it...
Wednesday, I managed to slip on the bathroom floor after my shower and now have a doorknob shaped bruise on my right hip. That's fun.
Yesterday, back at work, pulling books for another huge return. I haul the cart back to the receiving room to start packing it up, and the tape gun bit me while I was reloading. Still not sure how THAT happened, but result? Few more scratches, little bit more skin missing. And papercuts galore from boxes. Yay...
Last night while cooking dinner, I burned a couple fingers because I accidentally brushed the broiler while loading the pan into the oven. that was a nice bit of shrieking right there!
And today? Today I set my microwave on fire!! I was making a quick ham and cheese melt sandwich. Somehow, I missed a piece of plastic or wax paper or whatever they stick between cheese slices to make them come apart easier. I stick it in the microwave for 25 seconds to get the cheese nice and gooey and heat the meat through. go back 20 seconds later and there are FLAMES in my microwave... My sammich was ruined. And the roof of my microwave has black smudgy stuff all over it. I just cleaned it two days ago!
And now, I have a long ass day at work tomorrow. I don't know that I'm going to survive!!
Sadly, this is just the stuff I remember off the top of my head that happened...
Sunday, I managed to pierce my thumb with various accouterments at work not once, but twice. Once was with one of the sizers that we clip on clothing hangers. I was clearing down extra hangers, and had to pull them off, and the plastic sizer snapped on me. Plastic bits embedded in thumb!! Second time occurred when I was cleaning up the buckets we put the hard security tags in. In theory, there's a separate pail for the silver spikes we use to pin the tags to the clothes. In theory. I ended up with one of the spikes driven through the same thumb.
That REALLY hurt!Then, while unloading a few boxes of clothes to restock the for, I managed to tear some skin off my knuckles. Right at the apex of the bendy part, so whenever I had to bend my fingers the entire day after that, it opened up and started bleeding again. This all happened on Sunday.
Monday, I had class, and came home. Went to the kitchen to attempt to grab a granola bar from the pantry. Cue canned pumpkin falling on my head. Owwww...
Tuesday, I'm back at work. some asshat I work with stacked friggin CALCULUS packages on top of general novels (think the size of mass market paperbacks), then shoved some other largish books in front to keep it balanced. I pulled the largish books for a return and the calculus packages fell on me...from a shelf above my head. I ended up with bruises down my left arm, on my right hand and on my belly from me trying to duck out of the way after the first few packages fell on me.
Tuesday, I also had to shrink wrap some stuff back together. Our machine is kinda old, so the spring mechanism doesn't work as well to hold up the arm. It started to fall, I thrust out my arm to catch it, and realized a split second later that there's a red-fucking-hot wire attached to the arm, and seared a line down MY arm as a result. That kinda hurt, too. To end the day, I scraped a few layers of skin off a few more fingers when I went to grab a four high to restock the floor, but no one had secured the arms to the base, so I try to haul it by the base and the arm slams down into the metal tube where it meets the base (adjustable heights and whatnot), and takes a couple layers of skin off my fingers while it's at it...
Wednesday, I managed to slip on the bathroom floor after my shower and now have a doorknob shaped bruise on my right hip. That's fun.
Yesterday, back at work, pulling books for another huge return. I haul the cart back to the receiving room to start packing it up, and the tape gun bit me while I was reloading. Still not sure how THAT happened, but result? Few more scratches, little bit more skin missing. And papercuts galore from boxes. Yay...
Last night while cooking dinner, I burned a couple fingers because I accidentally brushed the broiler while loading the pan into the oven. that was a nice bit of shrieking right there!
And today? Today I set my microwave on fire!! I was making a quick ham and cheese melt sandwich. Somehow, I missed a piece of plastic or wax paper or whatever they stick between cheese slices to make them come apart easier. I stick it in the microwave for 25 seconds to get the cheese nice and gooey and heat the meat through. go back 20 seconds later and there are FLAMES in my microwave... My sammich was ruined. And the roof of my microwave has black smudgy stuff all over it. I just cleaned it two days ago!
And now, I have a long ass day at work tomorrow. I don't know that I'm going to survive!!
Sadly, this is just the stuff I remember off the top of my head that happened...
I AM the evil bastard!
Comment