Things I Learned From Disney Movies

[Sheldonrs]

That you will be married happily ever after despite marrying a random stranger that, for all you know, constantly leaves wet towels on the bed and pees in the potplants instead of the loo. Which would slowly drive me insane and probably result in murder.

All women are weirdly proportioned.

Pot plants? Were you watching "Fantasia"?

[McGoddess09]

You don't need to work for what you want in life. A man will just come and save you. This only happens if you are pretty.

I love Disney, but that part just kinda ticks me off.

[AriGriffin]

When I worked for Disney, my roommates (also Disney employees), and I would often hold movie nights where we would talk about characters, plots, and general Disney stuff. Some of the topics included:

-Only girls with one or more parent dead or MIA can be a princess.
Snow White- Mother dead, Father dead/MIA, Step-Mother psycho bitch
Cinderella- Both parents dead, Step-Mother jealous bitch
Sleeping Beauty- Parents alive, but MIA for most of Aurora's life
The Black Cauldron- Eilonwy's parents MIA
The Little Mermaid- Mother dead
Beauty and the Beast- Mother dead/MIA
Aladdin- Mother dead
Pocahontas- Mother dead
Atlantis: The Lost Empire- Mother dead
The Princess and the Frog- Father dead

-Pixar is sexist. There is not a Pixar movie where the MAIN character is a woman.
Toy Story 1,2,&3- Woody/Buzz Lightyear
A Bug's Life- Flik
Monsters Inc- Mike/Sully (also, fans of Dr Quinn, Medicine Woman much?)
Finding Nemo- Marlin/Nemo
The Incredibles- Bob Parr - Mr. Incredible
Cars- Lightening McQueen
Ratatouille- Remy/Linguini
WALL-E- Wall-e
Up- Carl Fredricksen/Russell
ETA- It looks like The Bear and the Bow might break it as it appears the main character is a woman.

-Mickey, Minnie, Donald, and Goofy's family trees.

-The various things hidden in Disney movies- like you can see Mickey, Donald, and Goofy an underwater scene during the first few minutes of The Little Mermaid.

-Disney will rope any female character into their Princess group if she is popular enough.

[dalesys]

Mr. Bluebird won't crap on your head.

Zip-rip-de-doodlesquat, zip-shits-T&A...

[r2cagle]

" All it takes is faith and trust... and a little bit of pixie dust" --Peter Pan

Still haven't found a stupid pixie, and I nearly broke my neck jumping from the second story bedroom window trying to fly.

[Lace Neil Singer]

That as long as a lion roars, it makes everything all better.

Seriously; remember that part at the end of the Lion King? The whole bloody place was devastated; no water, the plants were all dead and there were no herds. Yet Simba roars and suddenly everything's back to normal. XD

[joe hx]

"You only get in trouble if you get caught."

Alladin

[LillFilly]

My belief in magic was crushed when I learned that wearing underwear printed with pictures of the characters WILL NOT turn you into them like the commercial showed!!!

FALSE ADVERTISING!!!

[Mnemjian]

That cuddly forest creatures have complex human-like personalities, can communicate with each other regardless of species, and will come to your aid if you are sexy enough?

[Amina516]

Also, Ive realized...trading your voice for a great set of gams doesnt work out too well for anybody. Unless youre half an octopus.

[Jack T. Chance]

Things I learned from a Disney movie (and its upcoming sequel):

• It is possible to be DISINTEGRATED by a high-power laser beam AND SURVIVE!
• After being blasted by said laser, you can be "digitized" and transported into the virtual realm that exists only inside a computer!
• Said virtual realm is much, much cooler than the real world... and more sinister, too.
• The same laser that destroyed your body can somehow be reversed to re-integrate you!
• Inside the virtual world, motorcycles are, like, 100 times cooler than in the real world!
  Exhibit A:
  
  
  Exhibit B:
  

[Evil Queen]

How do you get in that thing?

[Amina516]

How do you get in that thing?

We can only hope its not like the "segways" they had in that one South Park episode....

Anyone know what Im talking about? LOL

[Jack T. Chance]

How do you get in that thing?

Just like the original lightcycles... as you enter the "Games Grid" it forms itself around you, just materializing out of thin air! That "back armor" appears to be at least somewhat flexible, though, as a shot in the teaser trailer shows a rider sitting up and looking around.

You should watch the teaser trailer, you get to see a nifty shot of a rider jumping into mid-air, the new lightcycle forms around him, then as the wheels hit the ground, he takes off! It's SWEET!

We can only hope its not like the "segways" they had in that one South Park episode....

Anyone know what Im talking about? LOL

Yes, I do! And you're evil for even mentioning that one!

[Sheldonrs]

How do you get in that thing?

If only I had a dime for everytime I said that.