so a glanced over at my gf's laptop

[Eireann]

Marriage doesn't equal love, in all cases. Sometimes, one party is simply determined to "claim their property", so that the other person can be viewed as theirs, and theirs alone. Obsession, clinginess, neediness - these things are all used as excuses to get married, but that doesn't make it a healthy relationship, it doesn't make it the right thing for either party, and it sure as hell doesn't mean love or anything similar to it.

In the best-case scenario, two people get married because they love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together. But life is not the best-case scenario.

[superhotelworker]

I look at rings for the "OOH SHINY!" part of me that needs something to look at. I've screenshared Mark a few of them on Skype and and I joke that one or the other is what I'll get when I get engaged. :P

It's a scary concept, but one more than a few people face.

[Sliceanddice]

i did the same thing a few years ago about 2 years after evil left me.

found an antique jewelry site and just started looking at shinys and drooling

[Flying Grype]

I was scared the first time someone wanted to marry me.

It wasn't fear of someone loving me -- it was fear of having to spend the rest of my life with this guy. He was way more in love with me than I was with him, and he kept spouting these dreams of 2.4 kids and a dog in the suburbs despite my repeatedly telling him that was not the life I wanted. After a year and a half I got out because he preferred his fantasy over paying attention to my reality.

Don't believe that you're unlovable and should settle for whoever condescends to live with you. It doesn't work that way and you could miss out on true love later. I'm so glad I didn't stick with that guy, because I found the guy I really love later on (I was maybe 25 when we met, 28 when we started dating, and now we're engaged at 33.)

[draftermatt]

When my wife and I moved in together (before marriage or engagement) we bought a house rather than rent.

At the settlement table the title company lady made a comment about us needing to get married, and my reaction was not all that pleasant.

See, I was 19 she had just turned 20. If we broke up we were out a house. Our finances were separate, and we split all the bills. We had discussed marriage, but neither of us were ready to head down that road just yet.

I'd have been freaked out about seeing rings on the computer too. Especially if we hadn't discussed it.

Jester's advice is so good I intend on using it myself.

I've had a few friends where one person wanted marriage and kept pushing. I've never gotten involved unless asked, and while that will remain my policy, I do think I'll use that if I am asked.

[Pony_Boy]

wow! didn't mean to start a big thing sorry


Ok my OP was mostly done tongue in cheek. GF and I have been dating for a little over a year and marriage has been discussed for father ( much father) down the road

I think she was just looking at what style she likes so she can give me ideas when/if the time comes. Since I plan to get a ring custom made, I appreciate her efforts, but I'm not gonna lie my heart skipped a few beats when I saw her perusing diamonds

[Becks]

There is no universal expiry on an engagement.

My engagement is currently 7 1/2 years and counting.

[r2cagle]

wow! didn't mean to start a big thing sorry

Relax... everyone has an opinion. Most of us like to share it whether you want it or not.

But really... get spare keys made for those shackles.

[Pony_Boy]

But really... get spare keys made for those shackles.

Shackles?.....but I just got used to being handcuffed!

[NotSoInnocent]

Shackles?.....but I just got used to being handcuffed!

Leather with custom rabbit fur lining. That's the only way to go, imo.

[protege]

....and into the gutter we go!

[r2cagle]

....and into the gutter we go!

If we try 'real' hard, we can make it to the sewer!

[Evil Queen]

Maybe she's not looking at rings for her? Maybe a girlfriend asked for her opinions on rings?

I look at wedding rings all the time. I'm single. I just like pretty things and yearn for the day when I can wear jewelry again. (I seem to be allergic to most metals)

[NotSoInnocent]

....and into the gutter we go!

*crotchety old lady voice* HEY! You get OUT of my GUTTERS, ya' lil' whippersnappers! Yer blockin' my LIGHT!

*grins*

[BookstoreEscapee]

....and into the gutter we go!

When were we ever out?