Would if I could...but would you?

[raw456]

Jump out of a perfectly good airplane with nothing but nylon and string between me and terminal velocity.

This would be my choice if it weren't for the vertigo

[Jester]

[/I]

You haven't seen the in the mod channel....
Along with the "You tell him, I won't" Gregorian chant.

No, I haven't. But your comments tell me that they don't want me posting those pictures. Got it.

[dalesys]

No, I haven't. But your comments tell me that they don't want me posting those pictures. Got it.

I'm not a mod, just physic... sick-ick... nutz.

[Misty]

I'd fly to Japan to deliver a pizza.

PLEASE DO! The pizza here is nothing short of an affront to the pizza gods. Even the U.S. franchises like Pizza Hut and Domino's are horrible (yes, even more so, if you can believe it). Popular toppings include tuna, corn, and mayonnaise (I swear they are obsessed with mayo-they put it on everything), and as the final insult, the cost of a large pizza is around $25 USD.

The point is, I would pay handsomely for good pizza. In fact, I already have.

I have commissioned the finest pizza chefs in New York City to make me a large mushroom pizza with extra cheese. The cheese came from the milk of rare purebred snow cows, who spent their days grazing on the virgin grass of the rolling hills of Austria, inhaling clean pure air while listening to Julie Andrews singing the entire Sound of Music soundtrack.

The tomato sauce was made by a little old woman in Tuscany whose family has been making tomato sauce coveted by kings and conquerers for 10 generations. The sauce is considered a national treasure and has never been allowed outside of Italy. She is the last of her family, so the secret of the sauce will die with her. It took some smooth talking and a lot of bribes, but I've managed to smuggle a jar of it out of the country.

The mushrooms grow only on a remote mountaintop in the Andes. A six man expedition were sent to retrieve them; only three returned.

As for the pizza dough...that information is classified. If you knew anything more than that, you would have to die.

Anyhoo, the pizza is scheduled for delivery on January 18, but I still need someone to deliver it. Are you up for it? If so, be at JFK airport at 6pm on January 17. Go to the International Departures terminal, United Airlines counter #8. Say "I really want some Orange Cow Piss." You will be directed to a VIP lounge. When you arrive, don't be alarmed when they throw a bag over your head, grope you like a drunk frat boy and drag you away, it's just standard security measures. Before you know it, you will be sitting in the lap of luxury on a private jet; at that point, all you have to do is relax, watch movies, eat good food, and check on the pizza every 20 minutes. It will be in the oven of the plane's kitchen; your job will be to make sure the oven is warm enough to keep it hot and fresh without overcooking it or letting it get cold.

When you arrive in Tokyo, a Japanese man in a dark suit, lemon yellow tie, and blue tinted sunglasses will be waiting for you, holding a sign that says, "PICHA MISSED YOU!" When you see him, say hello. If he does not respond, he is your guy. He has instructions not to talk to you, just to get the pizza. Hand the pizza to him and he will give you your money. Then get back on the plane and go home.

There is no room for mistakes. I am in the middle of some delicate negotiations with the Japanese mafia and this pizza is my ace in the hole. If anything goes wrong they will kill me, you, our families, and anyone else who had anything to do with this pizza.

Needless to say, you will be well paid for your time. How does $7.25 an hour plus tip sound?

[Dave1982]

*blink blink*

Either you've got an unhealthy craving for good pizza, or you've had a little too muchn sake.

If my inhibitions were to suddenly take a holiday, I'd go find a certain special someone, stop pussyfooting around, and just kiss her full on in front of everyone.

[Elspeth]

I would tell my in laws off. They have done horrible things to my geek. The boy has very little self esteem and thinks he is a loser. And says he is sorry for everything. I want to harm them.

The rest of you guys have a lot more fun things to do.

[Racket_Man]

unfortuenately my stuff involves machettes, swords, bamboo shoots, dental drills, lances, spears, AK-47s, a rubber chicken, a scuba mask and 100 pounds of C4.

[MoonCat]

unfortuenately my stuff involves machettes, swords, bamboo shoots, dental drills, lances, spears, AK-47s, a rubber chicken, a scuba mask and 100 pounds of C4.

Y'know....this could work for me, too. Tell ya what: I'll help carry and we can share.

[shankyknitter]

1. I'd go professional with my Dominatrix hobby (now that I think about it that might pay for college...hmm...)

2. I couldn't have gotten on the train to come back from Ohio and I'd have just stayed with The Boy.

3. Get drunk off my ass and go to amateur night at a strip club. I belly dance and look damned good doing it if I do say so myself. I might make some cash here.

The fourth would have been 'allow a professional photographer to photograph me during a Domme/sub session and pose for pin up shots.' However I'm doing this next month since that's what The Boy begged for for his birthday and awesome girlfriend that I am I said yes.

(If anyone is interested in them after I get them PM me and I'll send links to the photos after they're online)

[Racket_Man]

Y'know....this could work for me, too. Tell ya what: I'll help carry and we can share.

no problem

[ShinyGreenApple]

I'd grab the face of a certain coworker and kiss him like there's no tomorrow and maybe more. He's a mess and would be nothing but trouble, but I'd be lying if I said he wasn't damned attractive.

I'm sad.