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Go AWAY!
Continued from my "Even by my standards..." thread of a few months ago... NOW break out the can of creep repellent.
So I meet this guy for lunch. I figure we'll go to the mall food court, wander around and then go our separate ways. All in public places so I think he'd be normal. Not quite.
We meet in the lobby of a hotel. First strike: surprising me again with hands over the eyes from behind (now that I replay it in my head, he was pinning me to the chair--NOT COOL). Then says: "Close your eyes, I have a present for you." He's carrying a small bag, so I figure OK, it's a book or pen or something. The guy tries to French kiss me in the middle of a crowded lobby!
(again, kinda pinning me to the chair so I can't pull away) He apparently takes my momentary total confusion as "yes, I want a relationship with you".
Cue more awkwardness and refusals on my part (I don't need to explain myself in detail; what about my "thanks for the compliments but no thanks" was unclear?). I'm almost ten years older than you...that's not "really cute" and you're NOT striking me as real mature right now. You've had three ex-girlfriends (I wonder why?).
I finally get him to back off and silly me, think lunch is going to be uneventful. Cue trying to make out with me on the train...GAH. I flee to one of the single seats in the car. Normal conversation due to the fact that there is now an aisle between us...well, normal conversation after an attempted psychoanalysis of why I have a single seat
(I like not feeling like a sardine if I can help it, and you disturb me)
At Borders, after buying a DVD (and getting into SC territory), he says he has to use the restroom. Fine, I'll hang out in sci-fi. He puts both hands on my shoulders and leads me toward the restrooms, saying jokingly "I better make sure you don't get kidnapped". I've had friends who got away from controlling boyfriends and this is not "cute". It's possessive and frankly very disturbing. See that uniformed guard? Yes, he's staring at you. BACK OFF or I will make the rest of your day very bad. (I think I snarled at him; he correctly read that as "stop it")
T station going back into town: "Now make sure you keep up with communications, I don't want to put your picture on a milk carton". (I failed to return his incessant calls when I was on vacation cause...well, I was on vacation and to be honest he was calling a bit too often). He may have thought he was joking around, but...combined with everything else that went on, yellow/red flag. I pointedly move toward a crowd of people (that's another thing, during the entire afternoon he wouldn't let himself be more than a foot from me save for the restroom).
"Hey, can we make out until your stop?" NO. I must have been channeling my wolf at that point, because he backed down after only a glare. Unfortunately due to the layout of the seats and crowded train I wasn't able to extricate myself until I had to make a mad dash to disembark (usually I'm so careful to not get myself in that situation). "So we have a date on Valentines Day?" I never said anything that could be construed as an agreement. I have classes and hopefully also a job by then.
I now know the whole story of why he was banned from first the anime group, then a game night, then the organization as a whole (he claims he left, but I have my doubts).
I relayed this entire story to my mom, who had the same red flags that I did.
What could possibly lead someone to think that making out on the second face-to-face meeting is okay? I'm also considering talking to the group facilitator who banned him; yes, I did give him my number, but all I was expecting was someone to hang out with. Not being hit on.
*updates phone/email block list*
So I meet this guy for lunch. I figure we'll go to the mall food court, wander around and then go our separate ways. All in public places so I think he'd be normal. Not quite.
We meet in the lobby of a hotel. First strike: surprising me again with hands over the eyes from behind (now that I replay it in my head, he was pinning me to the chair--NOT COOL). Then says: "Close your eyes, I have a present for you." He's carrying a small bag, so I figure OK, it's a book or pen or something. The guy tries to French kiss me in the middle of a crowded lobby!
(again, kinda pinning me to the chair so I can't pull away) He apparently takes my momentary total confusion as "yes, I want a relationship with you".Cue more awkwardness and refusals on my part (I don't need to explain myself in detail; what about my "thanks for the compliments but no thanks" was unclear?). I'm almost ten years older than you...that's not "really cute" and you're NOT striking me as real mature right now. You've had three ex-girlfriends (I wonder why?).
I finally get him to back off and silly me, think lunch is going to be uneventful. Cue trying to make out with me on the train...GAH. I flee to one of the single seats in the car. Normal conversation due to the fact that there is now an aisle between us...well, normal conversation after an attempted psychoanalysis of why I have a single seat
(I like not feeling like a sardine if I can help it, and you disturb me)At Borders, after buying a DVD (and getting into SC territory), he says he has to use the restroom. Fine, I'll hang out in sci-fi. He puts both hands on my shoulders and leads me toward the restrooms, saying jokingly "I better make sure you don't get kidnapped". I've had friends who got away from controlling boyfriends and this is not "cute". It's possessive and frankly very disturbing. See that uniformed guard? Yes, he's staring at you. BACK OFF or I will make the rest of your day very bad. (I think I snarled at him; he correctly read that as "stop it")
T station going back into town: "Now make sure you keep up with communications, I don't want to put your picture on a milk carton". (I failed to return his incessant calls when I was on vacation cause...well, I was on vacation and to be honest he was calling a bit too often). He may have thought he was joking around, but...combined with everything else that went on, yellow/red flag. I pointedly move toward a crowd of people (that's another thing, during the entire afternoon he wouldn't let himself be more than a foot from me save for the restroom).
"Hey, can we make out until your stop?" NO. I must have been channeling my wolf at that point, because he backed down after only a glare. Unfortunately due to the layout of the seats and crowded train I wasn't able to extricate myself until I had to make a mad dash to disembark (usually I'm so careful to not get myself in that situation). "So we have a date on Valentines Day?" I never said anything that could be construed as an agreement. I have classes and hopefully also a job by then.
I now know the whole story of why he was banned from first the anime group, then a game night, then the organization as a whole (he claims he left, but I have my doubts).
I relayed this entire story to my mom, who had the same red flags that I did.
What could possibly lead someone to think that making out on the second face-to-face meeting is okay? I'm also considering talking to the group facilitator who banned him; yes, I did give him my number, but all I was expecting was someone to hang out with. Not being hit on.
*updates phone/email block list*
What, you can only stalk someone if you're dating them?!?
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