Boy has me confused!

[AdminAssistant]

My advice: keep talking to him on a friendly level, and offer to hang out when you get there...y'know, get to know each other. I would hold off on dating for right now, because you're starting college, and you're going to meet a ton of new people. Honestly, he sounds a bit clingy (already) and you really don't want somebody like that taking up all of your time when there's so much else to do.

[Lindsey]

Question has been answered! I asked him out today, he responded kinda incredulously because he was under the impression we'd already decided to go out. So awesome, I have a date next month! Thanks guys!

[Sheldonrs]

Have fun on the date but...It won't hurt anyhing if you also take a small can of mace with you.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I'm inclined to agree with Mooncat, and Admin Asst.

It's great that you have clarified the date issue, but I would suggest just taking things slow, keep it casual until you really get a chance to get to know the guy, and get settled in at school and all. He does sound a bit over the top, but there are several possible reasons for that, from the innocent, to the not so innocent. I also second the advice to meet him in a public place first. He may be the nicest guy in the world, but until you can know that for sure, you shouldn't put yourself in a position for something bad to happen (such as your first meeting/date being the two of you alone in a dorm room).

I know all kinds of exciting things are on the horizon for you...Just be careful, 'kay?

[Plaidman]

....


Be careful. Please. Especally since he really wants you to get to his place alone, before you even gone out in public. He may be using a fake account at a libray, use a pal's place and do something horrible to you and you couldn't do anything to protect yourself if your not careful. Even if you do take him to court if he does something bad, alot of those messages are going to be Awww! We're soulmates! I WOVE YOU SO MUCH!. Jury isn't going to take anything you say seriously.


Of course that's worst case scenery.


Look. You don't know me. I have like, next to zero experence when it comes to women. (What I do know is pretty sucky).

But every scumbag alarm is going off in me inner alarm. Something isn't right. Be careful. and for whatever luck God cares to crap out on ya, og on a date in public first, and let every pal and friend you do have in the area know who this guy is, where he lives.

It will NOT hurt your relationship if it works out at all, to let everyone know where your going to be to save you. Ok?

Please be careful. every bit in me is saying something bad is going to happen.

[Squeaksmyalias]

I have to say, normal guys who are interested in a girl don't typically quote movies, or songs. I'm not saying it doesn't happen if they are uber romantic, but even then that happens more face to face then with a girl they've chatted online with. BUT from my experience guys who quote lovey stuff tend to be full of it. Or completely unoriginal...

That being said, any time you plan on meeting someone online. Meet in a public place, tell people where you will be, and bring someone along or at the very least have check in times with a friend or family member. Do NOT lie about it, because if something does happen they need to know. People can be creeps, he could be leaving things out of conversations very easily, he could be talking to several girls like he is to you. I know I sound jaded and harsh and he could be an awesome guy, but until then be safe about it. Your safety is more important then any potential relationship with this guy, and if he truly wants to be your friend or boyfriend he will be understanding about that. If he isn't understanding about that, he isn't worth your time and doesn't care about you. I put that in bold for a reason, keep that in mind. Please be safe.

[Peppergirl]

Hmmmm.

I'm probably gonna catch alot of shit for saying this, but my vibe is 'gay and doesn't know it yet'.

Don't hit me, ya'll. I'm an old lady.

[Plaidman]

But such a cute /old/ lady XD

[Lindsey]

there are several possible reasons for that, from the innocent, to the not so innocent.

I've talked to him since and he's clarified that if this goes beyond dating, it'd be his first relationship, he hasn't been with any girls before. So I'm thinking innocent. I'm really not worried by him.

But we're going out for dinner before we do movies or anything in his room. And everyone will know I'm with him - I'm not secretive about stuff like this!

[Plaidman]

... So, this guy can spring out total romantic moves? Even if it's a repeat from movies, and he is all over you with utter ease, and he claims he never has a girlfriend?

Where he get the sudden surge of courage? Even when I was first dating, I didn't do super sweet smooth lines like that, it took a while. I could never spring it on a random girl on a random page I just so happen to find. (How did he find you again? )

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I take it you have never met this guy in person? And he's already going on about "compatibility" and "where have you been all my life?" and feeling some "connection?"

Ummm, yeah, proceed with caution. He could be completely innocent, or he could just want free passes to the Tunnel of Love.

[Lindsey]

... So, this guy can spring out total romantic moves? Even if it's a repeat from movies, and he is all over you with utter ease, and he claims he never has a girlfriend?

Where he get the sudden surge of courage? Even when I was first dating, I didn't do super sweet smooth lines like that, it took a while. I could never spring it on a random girl on a random page I just so happen to find. (How did he find you again? )

The sudden surge of courage would come from my showing interest in him. I'd been dropping hints for a few days at that point, plus I accepted both his invites out right away. Romantic lines online aren't necessarily "total romantic moves". I'm not expecting us to be that comfortable with each other immediately - if it works out, it'll take time, we'll still need to get to know each other in person. We've talked about it and it's not going to be a problem.

I didn't lay out the whole story because what I was asking for advice on was whether I was misreading his interest - and that's been answered. I appreciate the concern but I understand what I'm getting into and I don't need the advice - I know all the rules of meeting someone new from online, we're not going to be alone right away, and I'm not expecting miracles to happen. I just want to go on a few dates with him and see where we end up going.

[Plaidman]

.... Well if one isn't given the whole story, we can only go based on what you told us, which is you just randomy get a message from a guy who tells you your the love of his life. How are we suppose to react to that?


In anycase..... good luck.

[Lindsey]

Yeah, sorry about that.. I was trying to keep it concise because again I only wanted advice about whether I was misreading him, not whether he's legitimate - so the other info seemed a little off-topic. As the thread went a little off-topic, I guess it no longer is. :P

Thanks for the luck!

[smileyeagle1021]

Hmmmm.

I'm probably gonna catch alot of shit for saying this, but my vibe is 'gay and doesn't know it yet'.

Don't hit me, ya'll. I'm an old lady.

Not at all... that would explain a lot. I'm not sure if that is the case, but it is a plausible explanation for why he seems to be having to try so hard. He's trying to overcome something, whether that is just a lack of experience that he is overcoming, or his orientation that he's overcoming (or his inexperience due to his orientation )
It is consistent with the statement that he is a really religious guy. It would explain why he is so desperate to prove that he isn't an abomination in the Lord's eye (assuming he is a member of one of the faiths that condemns homosexuality), and the best way to do that is to find a woman to get involved with and be married before the Lord. It happens all the time in Utah, it's gotten to the point that in Utah it is becoming near crisis level with families being torn apart when people who could no longer hide their homosexuality.

Oh and Tracy, are you admitting that you're as old as my fiance says you look
(no, he's never living that down, is he)