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My four year old nephew has mild Autism. He is just now "getting" potty-training. He occasionally has accidents (mostly wetting himself before he can make it to the toilet), but he's really trying. Now, I don't know how much I agree with what my sister did to get him to use the toilet instead of always soiling his pants, but it did work. What she did is EVERY time he went in his pants, she gave him a spanking (a few swats on his bear bum with an open palm). This did two things: it reinforced that what he was doing was unacceptable behavior and made the consequences of NOT using the toilet worse than the pleasure of playing and going in his pants. This went on for about 4 months before he finally started to use the toilet (before he would absolutely refuse to even sit on it).
That is a technique you do have to be very careful with, since it can go too far. It's considerably better to have a carrot of some kind as well as the stick, and to use it to reward any kind of improvement over the usual.
The experience I speak from is that at one point, I was being punished for absolutely everything that I did or didn't do or wasn't quick enough about. Suffice it to say that the NSPCC eventually got involved. That's an extreme case, but it can happen.
The vast majority of my memories of my childhood involve punishment. Intellectually I'm sure it didn't happen that way, but it's one of the reasons I don't talk to my parents anymore.
Seshat's self-help guide:
1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.
"All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.
This may be far out in left field, but have you ever considered hypnosis?
The hypnotherapist sent a bunch of stuff home with us, and in one brochure, there is a huge list of things that hypnosis can help with. Potty training older kids is on that list.
Re: potty training and punishment, it wouldn't work at all on Lil' Zel, who also has Autism (although high-functioning, but I digress).
Here the other day he went potty by himself and wanted to run over and tell us, only to hear us yelling "OMG STAND STILL SO WE CAN WIPE!"
The result? He got so scared he refused to go potty for 2 full days.
He's "recovered" by that experience already though, and is going potty on his own initiative now. We estimate that he won't need diapers (even at night) before we reach New Year.
Anyhoo, I've been told by professionals that it is very, VERY normal for persons with Autism Spectrum Disorders to be late on potty training. No need to push, though positive encouragement is always ok.
A theory states that if anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for, it will be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
Another theory states that this has already happened.
He's "recovered" by that experience already though, and is going potty on his own initiative now. We estimate that he won't need diapers (even at night) before we reach New Year.
Anyhoo, I've been told by professionals that it is very, VERY normal for persons with Autism Spectrum Disorders to be late on potty training. No need to push, though positive encouragement is always ok.
Bumpin' the thread with a reply to myself...
Well, turns out New Year wasn't the deadline after all. Over the last 5 days Lil'Zel showed that he's 100% potty trained now, so we got an extra Xmas gift instead
A theory states that if anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for, it will be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
Another theory states that this has already happened.
Late to the 'party,' but yeah! Good job mini-Zel! Yay for extra Christmas present!
"Is it the lie that keeps you sane? Is this the lie that keeps you sane?What is it?Can it be?Ought it to exist?"
"...and may it be that I cleave to the ugly truth, rather than the beautiful lie..."
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