The Extended Houseguest

[tropicsgoddess]

Phil sounds like a user to me and I'm hoping that he's not coming back again to sucker you guys into letting him sponge of you.

[taxguykarl]

I'm never going to agree to let anybody stay in my house for more than 2 nights again!

I believe it was Ben Franklin who quipped that fish and guests smell after three (3) days. Phil certainly demonstrated that.
Good to see that you managed to get rid of him without police involvement. Do yourselves a favor and change the locks, just in case.

[Pixilated]

It sounds as if the problem has been settled, and without a major breach between you, hubby and Sally. Hopefully Sally doesn't get too serious about this guy. It sounds like she has enough on her plate without him.

Um ... not to be paranoid or anything, but he didn't have a key to your house, did he ... ?

[taxguykarl]

Um ... not to be paranoid or anything, but he didn't have a key to your house, did he ... ?

That's not clear...but he did have plenty of time to locate Ghel's hidden spares or duplicate one.

[Ghel]

We didn't give Phil a key, but Sally has a key, which means Phil has access to a key. Changing the locks would mean either giving Sally a new key or locking her and her daughters out of our house. I don't want to do that right now.

If Sally lets Phil into the house at any point in the future, and I find out about it, I'm going to be pissed off. If I find Phil in my house ever again (with or without Sally), I'm going to call the police.

Sally said she's going to clean the guest room and take the rest of Phil's stuff to him. Hopefully this will be done before I get home from work today. I'm still going to go through the room and wash all the linens and make sure he hasn't left anything behind. I don't want to give him any excuse to show up at the house again.

[HYHYBT]

When Sally heard that Phil had left the guest room a mess when he left in a huff, she said she would come over and clean it. But she said it in a way that made it sound like we were putting an undue burden on her.

That's likely to be simply frustration at the situation in general showing through.

[Ghel]

It's not my fault that her boyfriend is an antisocial jerk. It's not my fault that he left instead of trying to make amends.

It's especially not my fault that she kept defending him, even to the point of saying "he's my best friend, even if we're not together any more." Which is complete BS. I know they were still having sex after the drunken incident and the abuse that accompanied it.

In fact, Phil left a condom wrapper in the middle of the guest room floor. There was other trash and dirty clothes, but the condom wrapper was right in the middle of the floor, where you couldn't miss it. I don't see how that can be anything other than a deliberate "you may have thrown me out, but I'm still screwing your sister."

[Pixilated]

Cripes, that is disgusting. What a jerk. With friends like that, Sally doesn't need any enemies.

Nobody here blames you for any of this, Ghel. Do you feel that Sally or Phil do? (Well, Phil no doubt does, because you and hubby decided you'd had enough of his boorish behaviour and thus screwed up his lovely no-cost, no-personal-responsibility-about-anything holiday ... though I doubt you or hubby care much what he thinks.)

[Ghel]

I don't know what Sally thinks. She hasn't talked to me since she agreed to clean up the guestroom. Which she did while I was at work.

[wolfie]

Phil hasn’t contributed to the house financially. He bought pizza one night, but that hardly makes up for the extra electricity and food he’s been using the rest of the time. Granted, he lost his wallet with all his travelers’ checks the night of the drunken incident, but that should be a reason to cut the trip short, not to sponge off of us the rest of the time.

The whole reason for traveler's cheques is so that they can be replaced if lost or stolen. Either Phil is a moron for not getting them replaced, or a lying sneak for getting them replaced and not telling anyone.

[Jester]

I'm gonna bet on both. I believe he's a moron in general, but I'm pretty sure he's a lying sneak and had them replaced. I would trust Phil about as far as I could throw a garbage dumpster. The difference between the two being, of course, that I usually have some use for a garbage dumpster.

[BookstoreEscapee]

In fact, Phil left a condom wrapper in the middle of the guest room floor.

At least they're using protection...?

At first I assumed these were fairly young people but then you mentioned she has a grown daughter...yeesh..

[Ghel]

The whole reason for traveler's cheques is so that they can be replaced if lost or stolen. Either Phil is a moron for not getting them replaced, or a lying sneak for getting them replaced and not telling anyone.

Once again, there was no communication on this between Phil and me or between Phil and my hubby. We had to find out things like this through Sally because Phil wouldn't speak to us. I don't know if he was intimidated or just anti-social, but I think the latter. If he was indimidated or somehow afraid to talk to us directly, he could have left us a note or something.

I hear that Phil is now staying in Jade's (the grown daughter's) garage. He made some passive-aggressive post on Facebook about how he was returning to some sense of normalcy. I wanted to respond, but I thought it better to just leave it alone.

[Pixilated]

Good move on your part, Ghel. Responding to that kind of petty nonsense is a no-win situation. A pointed silence says so much more.

[Jester]

Clearly you are far more mature than Phuck Phace....er, uh, Phil. Sorry.

What? I said Ghel was mature. I never said anything about myself!