Scammer Alert

[Rapscallion]

Also, just a question regarding the charitable donations, in the event of a major disaster, is posting links to general donation sites OK or is that going to be an issue? (ie after a major hurricane/bushfire/armageddon, someone posts a link to Red Cross/Salvation Army donation page)

No details yet, nothing decided.

I'd like to say publicly that I'm grateful for the level of support. Considering the condition claimed to be suffered and the artful way this was presented, I knew when posting this thread that it would likely blow up in our faces. A bad rule of thumb in a pissing match is to go up against those who are allegedly really the underdogs, and then some.

However, as Terry Pratchett said via Granny Weatherwax, if you break a rule, break it good and hard.

For those who weren't watching at the time, last night (UK time) I was in discussion on the FB donation page concerned, pointing out the occasional hole in the tale presented. Two scoffing claims came forward saying it was a completely different site being referred to with a similarly abbreviated name.

I forgot at the time that they'd posted up our PMs with names redacted on there, but just noted with interest that in that case they'd been posting rebuttals on their sites immediately after we'd contacted them, and thus they'd managed to get banned at two places at the same time, suggesting a common theme. There was a stunned silence, I imagine, because after a minute posts began to be deleted.

I love screen caps. Don't you?

Just saying.

Rapscallion

[fireheart]

Thanks fireheart, but I wasn't posting to get sympathy or make it all about me.

I hadn't heard your story before. If anything, I saw it as more empathic than garnering sympathy.

I've stopped the free-for-all-any further posts are just getting reported to the appropriate people and leaving it at that.

[Ree]

Also, I offer to you for your story. I can imagine that it would've taken a lot to share that story.

Thanks fireheart, but I wasn't posting to get sympathy or make it all about me.
I was just telling my story to illustrate how people can so wrongly judge another person, and how it is so easy to make assumptions without walking in their shoes for a bit.

Again, I do think this person's story is legitimate, and I am not attacking them for trying to get the money for their cause.
Because I think it is legitimate, I do worry about what is happening to their stress level right now, and as I said, I really wish the free for all on the blog would just stop.

My whole problem from the start of this mess has been the nastiness directed to this site, and, in turn, to me, even though names weren't named (it was obvious who was meant) because we said "enough" when it came to asking for money.

The whole thing has just spiralled into a huge ball of hatred.
It makes me very sad.

[Pimento]

I know we're trying to make our site look all good and stuff.

But quite honestly if anyone spends time here they'd know that. I'm a fairly faceless member and have relieved lots of support and well wishes in private.

I'm not sure if I made the cut on the other site (don't care) but honestly. Do we really care what a spineless beggar posts?

[fireheart]

I'm a cynical prick. But honestly there's people on here who have taken the time to help me with my own issues that I didn't make public, yet they gave their support.

Same here. Just because people don't actively contribute doesn't mean they don't care. >.>

It's like any form of charity really: some people will just lend their support, some will spread awareness (like I do for Beyondblue's KidsMatter program), some people will donate and some people will actively turn up to a stall on the day and go "Right, what can I do?"

[Dentarthurdent]

I do apologise for my actions though-they did appear to have been "helpful" but from her perspective, it appears to have been harmful.

It's all over their blog. Including cs usernames. I've lost a lot of sympathy. That's like, half-outing people.

[Pimento]

I'm a cynical prick. But honestly there's people on here who have taken the time to help me with my own issues that I didn't make public, yet they gave their support.

As for that person. I could give a damn really

[fireheart]

So, yeah, we all have our own personal crosses, and it is ludicrous to assume that, because we no longer wished to make an exception to allow panhandling from a member, it means that nobody cares, or wishes harm to that person.

I 100% agree with you, even if you replace the word "panhandling" with other terms. (ie exception to allow people to post their commission sites in their signature. Just because they suddenly ban those doesn't mean that they don't care about your business)

Also, I offer to you for your story. I can imagine that it would've taken a lot to share that story.

There has been a ridiculous claim that we have actually wished harm on that person because of a comment that was a crudely worded way of saying Karma will get you, which, again, was exactly what was said in reference to me when I posted my side of the story, and it was removed with a lie claiming that I had doctored the message, and had, myself, posted blatant lies.

And I've now lost all sympathy for the other party.
I've seen your posts in the threads relating to the matter at hand and they were filled with nothing but support, suggestions for help and a sympathetic ear.

For them to turn around and claim otherwise is just....I have no words to describe it.

[Ree]

ETA: Ree, Raps, you guys may want to have a look at the outside links....it's turning ugly.

We had tried to maintain some sense of privacy about who the member is, but many have guessed it. Obviously they guessed correctly, since that member has been confirming it on their blog and FB page with verbal slams directed at us.

I am not going to engage in a battle on their personal blog, and I really wish that nobody else would either.

This person really doesn't need the added stress, even if a lot of it is being brought on by "caring friends" who are sharing screenshots of this thread on our site. (Personally, if I had a good friend whose health was at stake and who should be trying to stay as stress free as possible, I think I would be trying to shield them from the stress, rather than fanning the flames. That's just me, though. Different strokes!)

So, yes, comments have been made in response to this thread and some posts contained in it. At this point, I see it as them simply trying to save face, since they know in their heart that they have made claims that are not exactly true, and they know the proof of that exists. They can't shut out the truth, so shouting it down with more embellishments is the next best thing.

I know what I have done and said, and I can sleep quite well, despite what words may be pushed in my mouth, or what actions I may be accused of.

When I knew I couldn't afford to donate to this person's cause, I offered up a prayer for them. I do not regret that, and I still intend to keep them in my prayers that things will turn around for them.

As I said, I do know what it is like to struggle financially. I also know about personal loss. (Today is actually the 5th anniversary of my husband's death.)
I know about struggling with health issues. (I have been in chronic pain for 26 years from a benign tumor on my sciatic nerve that was discovered when I was in labour 6 weeks prematurely, with my only child, and was left incapable of having anymore.) I know the fear of almost losing a child...twice, while I watched her struggle to get strong enough to come home, and I ached to just hold her in my arms free of wires, and then, having survived all of that, she fell through a plate glass door at the age of 8 and came within inches of being decapitated, stabbed through the heart, or having her kidney severed, but still being scarred for life all over her body. I know about worrying about a grandchild as we have been dealing for several weeks with a severe dog bite on my granddaughter's hand that almost resulted in the loss of a finger.

So, yeah, we all have our own personal crosses, and it is ludicrous to assume that, because we no longer wished to make an exception to allow panhandling from a member, it means that nobody cares, or wishes harm to that person.

As I said before, there have been a lot of assumptions coming from people accusing others of the same.

There has been a ridiculous claim that we have actually wished harm on that person because of a comment that was a crudely worded way of saying Karma will get you, which, again, was exactly what was said in reference to me when I posted my side of the story, and it was removed with a lie claiming that I had doctored the message, and had, myself, posted blatant lies.

This whole thing is just absurd.

[fireheart]

To put this into perspective, right now there's nobody on here currently who is in trouble over this issue.

It's an emotive situation in two directions. I can't really blame people for being angry. However, we are currently reviewing the charitable donations rules as a direct result.

Rapscallion

Oh thank god.

Also, just a question regarding the charitable donations, in the event of a major disaster, is posting links to general donation sites OK or is that going to be an issue? (ie after a major hurricane/bushfire/armageddon, someone posts a link to Red Cross/Salvation Army donation page)

[Rapscallion]

To put this into perspective, right now there's nobody on here currently who is in trouble over this issue.

It's an emotive situation in two directions. I can't really blame people for being angry. However, we are currently reviewing the charitable donations rules as a direct result.

Rapscallion

[Pimento]

Have issue. Beg for money. Get told to stop begging. Get pissy. Happens all the time.

Though I hear pan handlers make pretty wicked cash actually. So there ya go

[fireheart]

This is being wildly and hilariously misrepresented elsewhere as you saying you hoped shit would hit this person in the face, and apparently this also means we wish this person harm. I'm...done commenting on it in that other place. Anything I say is going to blow up in my face.

Pretty much me as well. I'm also going to refrain from commenting further here since what I'm saying seems to be adding fuel to her fire and I'd rather not risk a ban on here. I do apologise for my actions though-they did appear to have been "helpful" but from her perspective, it appears to have been harmful. I'm not expecting help from the forum on this one-I can do this on my own.

[Dentarthurdent]

Looks like somebody is about to live the second part of my sig.

This is being wildly and hilariously misrepresented elsewhere as you saying you hoped shit would hit this person in the face, and apparently this also means we wish this person harm. I'm...done commenting on it in that other place. Anything I say is going to blow up in my face.

[fireheart]

And, lest I be accused of "doctoring the PM," as happened on the FB page where it is being claimed that I jumped to my conclusions and was wrong about the site and mod being referred to, I do have a screenprint, but hesitate to post it as it would identify the person.

I think most of us have figured it out by now.

But unlike the person in question, we are following the request of the MODs to not mention them.

I've been on this site for what, five years now. I know full well that the MODs do not ban people willy-nilly. They have a good reason for doing so. (and violating Rule #1 so many times doesn't count ) This person definitely overstepped the boundaries.

BTW, without going too much into the situation at hand, there is help out there that they could've accessed. The fact that they didn't suggests to me that they are more focused on the goal that caused them to get banned in the first place.