Workday Phrases of Lore and Legend

[Midorikawa]

I'm not going to eat OR DRINK a bull penis.

[crazylegs]

Are you looking at hard corn pore again?

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How do you live with yourself?
I don't, I live with my girlfriend.

[sarasquirrel]

What? You've never seen someone lay on a shelf before?

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I can't get this off. I cant get this sticky stuff off.

[Food Lady]

"Is it wrong that I just flashed on 'Silence of the Lambs?' "

[sarasquirrel]

I'm not doing you. You're bad!

[RestaurantDude]

A few from last night

What size nuts have you got?

Awe man! I just dropped my nut bag!

Did you screw in that fat one yet?

GO! GO! push harder! SHITshitshit! ::thud:: ... oops.

[Rapscallion]

"Yes! In-office Rick roll!"

Rapscallion

[Food Lady]

"The turtles are multiplying!"

[Spiffy McMoron]

I just found out that fucker Justin Beiber is Canadian! Why hasn't another country declared war on us?

[Bunny the Veggie Slayer]

"Was that you I was talking to in the pub last week, when the lady behind the bar was making sondsfrom a porn movie?"

[Gaki]

"Look at him out there, look at him, I know what he's saying, he's saying 'Oh, damn, it's not coming out, aaaaagggghhhh........meatloaf.' That's what he's saying."

[BrenDAnn]

"It's so hot in here! I was thinking about asking **manager** if I could work in nothing but my apron!"

[Midorikawa]

Quick! Call the boss before he gets home, starts drinking, and quits answering the on call phone!

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

"Okay, come on now, you're the pitcher, I'm the catcher."

[cinema guy]

L: "We have no team leaders in today."
CG: "Yes, L has murdered them all and buried them in his back garden."
L: "It is a terrible habit I have."