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It looks like he shaved his balls and glued the hair to his face.
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"Andy's the guy who gives us head. I mean gets us ahead. Shit."
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"It's like my uncle always says: 'Every time you have sex before you're married, put a penny in a jar. Every time you have sex after marriage, take a penny out of the jar. You will never get that jar emptied. Never.'"Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost dailyComment
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I really want to smack him upside the head...
... off a cliff ...
... into the parranha pitMeeeeoooow.....
Still missing you, PlaidComment
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"We call him 7 up because he just doesn't want to One Up you, he always has to do more"Comment
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"Do these people expect us to just pull things out of the air for them?"
"No. We pull them out of our ass. Get it right."Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost dailyComment
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Why would you be looking at naked fish? Are you into fish porn?
OMG, she's gonna go home and Google it to see what she can find.
Nope, but after you google it, let me know what you found out.
Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)
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"We have to turn our successes into failures.""Who loves not women, wine, and song remains a fool his whole life long" ~Martin Luther
"Always send a lazy man to the angel of death" ~Martin Luther
My MySpace
My LiveJournalComment
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"sometimes my butt hole hurts because i wipe it too much"Comment
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"Irv, why is (female co-worker) sick today?"
"Dunno."
"C'mon Irv, you should know this stuff!"
"What do you want me to say? 'She's not sick, she's just exhausted?'"
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"...Damn Irv, you're a beast!"Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost dailyComment
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Absolutely awesome letter received from exemployer after I wrote to ask a simple question regarding something contained in my personnel file -
Dear Telephoneangel
I don't know what to do about your question, I shall think about it for a while.But I am taking it seriously.
Sincerely
HR Officer.
Customer "why did you answer the phone if you can't help me?"Comment
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Wee as in Wictor"I look at the stars. It's a clear night and the Milky Way seems so near. That's where I'll be going soon. "We are all star stuff." I suddenly remember Delenn's line from Joe's script. Not a bad prospect. I am not afraid. In the meantime, let me close my eyes and sense the beauty around me. And take that breath under the dark sky full of stars. Breathe in. Breathe out. That's all."
-Mira FurlanComment
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"Burt doesn't own Burt's Bees anymore.....I wonder if the bees are sad?""Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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"Smells really pretty over there."
"Yeah, don't it? Chris could come over here and let one rip and nobody would ever know!"
"I disagree!"
"Chris, that's not a challenge."
BBBBRRRRIIIIPPPPPKnowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost dailyComment
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"So, if you didn't receive the item and it showed as zero value on the line, why did you remove it from the amount you paid?"
RapscallionComment
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"Oooooh, I think you should light it on fire!"
"What? Your hair?""Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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