New trend in parenting, let the child spank you!

[GayleShy]

Our family has been and is going through a horrible time, and all of our nerves are shot to hell. Yes, this does fit in with the story. I don't want you to think my Brother-in-Law is an ogre.

Having said that, my Brother-in-Law was at Blockbuster to rent a few movies to relieve the presure just a little bit. As he was standing in line, he saw a kid who was about 4 or 5 years old, telling his mother that he wanted sticky candy. The mother told him that she wasn't going to buy him any sticky candy. The kid started to scream and scream, and the mother ignored him. Then he started to spank his mother hard on the butt. That was when the mother looked down at him and said, "Sweetie, if you don't stop, Mommy's not going to buy you any sticky candy."

My Brother-in-Law said that he gave that mother a very dirty look and was so tempted to spank the kid himself he had to leave his movie and go somewhere else to rent it.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

See, I like it when I see stuff like this. You know why? Because when she hits adulthood, my child will be competing against people who were raised like this.

Of course, she will also be having to live with and even find potential mates from this same pool of useless gits, so that may actually backfire.

[crazylegs]

"Sweetie, if you don't stop, Mommy's not going to buy you any sticky candy."

[Crazylegs is currently lying on the floor, gently twitching, normal service will resume shortly] [/public service announcement]

let me get this straight:- Stop hitting me to get the thing I said no to originally and your now hitting me for?

Hmmm, lets dissect this a little shall we?

You are teaching your child that striking another person will get you what you want in life, at best this child will become an horrendous bully in school, at worst, a violent offender who will spend significant portions of their adult life in jail.

Why is there no licence to breed?

Stay Safe

[Boozy]

My little nephew (who's about 18 months old now) is going through a hitting phase. He likes to swat his mom on the butt. He's so small, and he doesn't mean anything by it, he just gets excited.

As a result, its kind of cute. So its really difficult for us to all turn our backs and ignore him when he does this. But its the only way he's going to learn that its an inappropriate way to get attention. And if we don't do it now, he'll keep doing it when he gets older and becomes not-quite-so-cute.

[Dreamstalker]

I used to swat (very lightly, think a cat batting at something) my mom to get her attention when I was a lot younger. We think that's where the cat learned it, as he never used to do that but now is.

[NotSoInnocent]

And this is why my children learned very early on that hitting is NOT ALLOWED EVER!

This is how it would go if I were that mother:

Kid: Mommy, gimme *insert whatever*!
Me: No.
Kid:*starts hitting*
Me:*grab kid, pick kid up and turn him/her around to face away from me while holding him/her*
Kid:*possibly yelling/flailing about*
Me:*ignoring kid and finishing transaction without buying whatever he/she was wanting* We are going home now. You are going to sit on your bed until *next meal*.
Me:*to employees and customers* I'm sorry that my child decided to act out. I hope that the rest of your day goes smoothly. *walk out of store*

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

"Sweetie, if you don't stop, Mommy's not going to buy you any sticky candy."

Let's fast forward to when the kid is 13 or 14 or so.

Kid: MOOOOOOOMMMMMMM! I need a cell phone! Iwantitiwantitiwantit!
Mom: No, you don't need a cell phone right now.

(Kid punches mom repeatedly in the face and belly)

Mom: Sweetie, if you don't stop punching me, I'm not going to buy you that cell phone!

Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids.

[Polenicus]

Let's fast forward to when the kid is 13 or 14 or so.

Kid: MOOOOOOOMMMMMMM! I need a cell phone! Iwantitiwantitiwantit!
Mom: No, you don't need a cell phone right now.

(Kid punches mom repeatedly in the face and belly)

Mom: Sweetie, if you don't stop punching me, I'm not going to buy you that cell phone!

Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids.

And the scary thing is, we've all seen this.

Remember Kusanagi's 29 year old 9 year old, who's parents were buying him a couch?

Yeah.

Problem is, it seems a lot of parents are desperate for their kids to just behave in public that they won't correct this for fear of the crying/screaming jag that will inevitably result, and the reactions of strangers around them. "If the kid will just be quiet, if they'll just behave, if they'll just be smiling and happy so the world can see I'm not a bad parent..."

Which is dumb. Now we've got the parents who actually care for their kids more concerned about public perception than what's good for the child, and the parents who don't care... still don't care.

We really SHOULD have parenting licenses. At least that way, we've have an opportunity to teach new parents the right way to deal with stuff, and how to adapt to each kid's unique needs, rather than just shaking our fingers at them whenever we notice something wrong.

[Sliceanddice]

i think its natural to hit your moms butt...
i mean no offense who do you spend the most of your time with?
Mom.
What is relatively eye level?
Mom's butt.
What do kids have alot of?
Energy.
What do you do when you have a lot of engery?
Run around, smake stuff act insane.
So what are kids going to smack?
Mommy's butt.
Hell my ass has gotten smacked and hit repeatedly by the little ones i babysat and such.
Its all desensitize....

[Seshat]

Problem is, it seems a lot of parents are desperate for their kids to just behave in public that they won't correct this for fear of the crying/screaming jag that will inevitably result, and the reactions of strangers around them. "If the kid will just be quiet, if they'll just behave, if they'll just be smiling and happy so the world can see I'm not a bad parent..."

And the irony is that most sensible people would actually prefer to see this:

Kid: Mommy, gimme *insert whatever*!
Me: No.
Kid:*starts hitting*
Me:*grab kid, pick kid up and turn him/her around to face away from me while holding him/her*
Kid:*possibly yelling/flailing about*
Me:*ignoring kid and finishing transaction without buying whatever he/she was wanting* We are going home now. You are going to sit on your bed until *next meal*.
Me:*to employees and customers* I'm sorry that my child decided to act out. I hope that the rest of your day goes smoothly. *walk out of store*

The situation is handled. The child is disciplined without being harmed. The noisemaking child is removed from public fairly promptly, and is taught that noisemaking achieves nothing desirable. The parent is in control at all times. The parent apologises for the inconvenience.

The child is unlikely to make further noise in the future, and increasingly unlikely as this discipline continues.

What's not to like?

[Lace Neil Singer]

Let's fast forward to when the kid is 13 or 14 or so.

Kid: MOOOOOOOMMMMMMM! I need a cell phone! Iwantitiwantitiwantit!
Mom: No, you don't need a cell phone right now.

(Kid punches mom repeatedly in the face and belly)

Mom: Sweetie, if you don't stop punching me, I'm not going to buy you that cell phone!

Even more scary scenario... fast forward to when kid is 17 or 18.

Kid: Mooooommmmm! I want a car! Iwantacarnow!!!!
Mom: No sweetie, you can't have a car.
Kid: (stabs Mom repeatedly)
Mom: (is too busy bleeding to death to give the standard reply)
Kid: (ends up in prison for the next 15 years)

[GayleShy]

i think its natural to hit your moms butt...
i mean no offense who do you spend the most of your time with?
Mom.
What is relatively eye level?
Mom's butt.
What do kids have alot of?
Energy.
What do you do when you have a lot of engery?
Run around, smake stuff act insane.
So what are kids going to smack?
Mommy's butt.
Hell my ass has gotten smacked and hit repeatedly by the little ones i babysat and such.
Its all desensitize....

Honestly, if the kid was younger, I think I'd agree with you, but when I was that age, I knew better than to hit my mother. So do my nieces. And also, it was more the fact that the kid was going get the very thing he was hitting her for if he stopped.

Rewarding bad behaivor is never a good thing.

[blas]

There's a difference between a kid being a kid and having a tendency to swat things.....but the kid in this story was MAD that they didn't get what they wanted, so they violently hit their mother. I'm sure it didn't hurt, but what did it teach them? It's ok to beat your parents!

Hell, if I had ever hit either of my parents, the best I could have hoped for would have been a closed casket funeral.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I know, trying to hit me is the surest and fastest way to end up in time out.

Time out exist anywhere we go, too. I don't care.

[kibbles]

JMO, but I don't think it's fair to judge a parent or even a child on one chance encounter. Lots of kids throw the most horrible temper tantrums, and lots of parents (in the moment) give into the child. But not every one of those children turn into horrible serial killers.

I'm not in no way condoning the child's behavior or giving into to that behavior, but that one isoloated incident doesn't automatically mean the child is going to grow up to be a bad person.