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Your beer can wait three minutes. I timed it.

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  • Your beer can wait three minutes. I timed it.

    So me and the BF head over to the grocery store so I can get the remaining necessary ingredients for me to make my broccoli chicken casserole (nomnomnom). I grabbed my can of soup and a bag of broccoli, and he grabs a pair of nail clippers and a bag of salad. We head towards the lines.

    I make a straight line towards the express checkout because, hey, its express! and there was no one in line there. I'm just about to the candy racks when Twitchy McAlcohol hops right in front of me with two 40s in hand. Okay. Whatever. But the cashier wasn't at the register, he was bagging at the next one over--so after doing a happy dance right in front of me, essentially pinning me against a gondola, he decides to get in the other line. BF is pissed. He does not like creepy people getting in my personal bubble--and neither do I, obviously.

    I go into the empty express lane because the light was on. I figured maybe the cashier just stepped away for a moment (if they didn't come back, I'd just go to another line). Cashier sees me from his bagging position and comes to ring me and BF up (we were ringing separately, not much difference).

    Twitchy McCrazyass decides that I stole his place in line. "Hey! I only got two things! Hey let me go ahead of you! I was here! I only got two things!" He starts waving his 40s around erratically, essentially freaking the fuck out

    BF holds up his items--by that time I was done ringing up. "How many things am I holding? Two? Yeah? Wait your turn, man. Your beer's not going to drink itself in the next two minutes."

    What the hell? If I ever get that hard up for alcohol then I just need to be put down.
    Would you like a Stummies?

  • #2
    Not to mention it's crappy alcohol to boot.

    40's are really rotgut shit. I'd drink Coors Light before I ever touched another 40.
    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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    • #3
      Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
      Not to mention it's crappy alcohol to boot.

      40's are really rotgut shit. I'd drink Coors Light before I ever touched another 40.

      So, you dont want to split a 40 of Ol' E or St Ives with me in the parking lot after you get off work? Shame...I was going to get TWO straws this time...


      Really though, I dont think Ive ever had a 40. Beer is beer but I dont think 40 oz at one time would stay down...

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      • #4
        Quoth Amina516 View Post
        So, you dont want to split a 40 of Ol' E or St Ives with me in the parking lot after you get off work? Shame...I was going to get TWO straws this time...


        Really though, I dont think Ive ever had a 40. Beer is beer but I dont think 40 oz at one time would stay down...
        Tempting as that is, I must pass.

        It's nothing more than a cheap buzz, plus it's more for me to drink than I care to in one go before it gets warm. I'd sooner spend a little more and get some PBR or something--at least it comes in smaller packaging and does the cheap buzz thing well.
        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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        • #5
          It's the nature of the beast. Hell, some of the suckiest regular customers at the gas station were always the ones in the biggest hurry to get home and down their 6 pack of $2.99 piss in a can....errr beer.

          I really don't care for beer and mostly drink at the bar where it's more expensive, but I've found if I'm going to drink at home, all I need is a decent selection of soda pop and juices to mix with either vodka or rum or flavors of Dr. McGuillicudy.
          You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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          • #6
            The way you describe him I can't help but imagine he looks like you avatar.

            (Speaking of avatars, I.P. love your new one ^_^ )
            wouldn't lube work better in a f***ing machine?
            ----
            Yes, that’s right. It’s a pair of gold foil headphones. Gold foil. Finally, headphones just as awful as your taste in music.

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            • #7
              I've seen bottles of stout (like Guiness) sold in 40oz bottles. The only reason I'd buy something that big though is if I was making cocktails.

              I know a good one (according to others, I'm a teetotaler) called a Black Velvet which uses stout and champaign.
              Low lie the Fields of Athenry/ Where once we watched the small free birds fly/ Our love was on the wing/ we had dreams and songs to sing/ It's so lonely around the Fields of Athenry

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              • #8
                Quoth blas87 View Post
                It's the nature of the beast. Hell, some of the suckiest regular customers at the gas station were always the ones in the biggest hurry to get home and down their 6 pack of $2.99 piss in a can....errr beer.

                I really don't care for beer and mostly drink at the bar where it's more expensive, but I've found if I'm going to drink at home, all I need is a decent selection of soda pop and juices to mix with either vodka or rum or flavors of Dr. McGuillicudy.

                I find I'm the exact same with when I (rarely) drink at home (hey, I can only stock up decent alcohol when I'm in Nevada)
                If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                • #9
                  Well damn smiley, if only you lived in Wisconsin.....I'd show ya how we really get down and have fun around here!
                  You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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                  • #10
                    I'm not really a fan of beer at all. I'd rather have some nice wine, or a Crown & Coke
                    Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Nyx View Post
                      The way you describe him I can't help but imagine he looks like you avatar.
                      I had to scroll back up for that and I Burst out laughing....it does look like OP describes...

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                      • #12
                        Sadly enough, the guy did look like my avatar. Except thankfully, he had a shirt on.
                        Would you like a Stummies?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth blas87 View Post
                          rum or flavors of Dr. McGuillicudy.
                          Ah! another patient. It is sad that we cannot get the the Dr. here in the southwest. We have to wait til family visits from out east to have them bring some or have them mail it.

                          We always get the menthol flavor. Yum.
                          I feel crazy. Like I'm drunk and trapped in a water globe and someone won't stop shaking it.
                          -The Amazing E
                          Zonies social group now open!

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                          • #14
                            I love almost all the flavors. One of my favorite drinks at the bar is a cherry cheesecake, which is Vanilla Dr, cranberry juice, and creamer to smooth it out. Another really good one is Cherry Dr and Sprite....of course you could replace the Sprite with Pepsi or Coke and it tastes great too!

                            And my favorite of all at HOME is a Tropical Screw. Malibu, pineapple juice, orange juice, and grenadine. The grenadine is optional, but makes it taste better. It's pretty much a less fattening Sex On The Beach.
                            You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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                            • #15
                              now a 40 of Sapporo... yum yum

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