Teen Pregnancy

[Tithera]

I was at my favorite local eatery (mentioned this place once before in another thread here) and once again, the SC's were out. One in particular was out to get me apparently. I am patiently waiting in line to get my food when this woman, who smelled horribly and had MASSIVELY tangled hair, comes out of nowhere and starts rubbing my belly and asking when I'm due.
1) I am not pregnant, I am just overweight and very self-conscious about it
2) You, do not, in any circumstance, go up to a total and complete stranger and start rubbing their belly, pregnant or not. That is uncomfortable and unwanted, so step away!

I politely tell the lady I am not pregnant. She gets a confused look on her face and asks how old I am. Now, normally, I look younger than what I am. My thought process was that she thought I was much older than I truly am; still it is none of her buisness, but I play along, praying it will make her go away.

Me: I'm 19 ma'am.
SC: GASP! You can't wait much longer, you'll get too old! Why haven't you had any yet?
WTF?
Me: I didn't know that waiting until I was more mature and responsible to take care of a baby was bad.
SC: i had my first child at 14 and I'm doing perfectly well! Are you saying I'm not mature and responsible?
Me: yes, because you're sitting and arguing with me about the subject when your child is playing ontop of the tables, about ready to fall off.
She looks around, yells obscentities at the child and then gets her food (paid with food stamps somehow) and leaves.

Now, normally I do not have anything against teen pregnancy. If it is part of your religion, or if your responsible enough as a teen to be a good mom, then kudos to you. But when teenagers have kids because they're stupid and don't wear protection or plan to have a kid then get bored after a few months and neglect their responsibilities are the ones that really piss me off. I'll watch "16 and Pregnant" on MTV and just be flabbergasted at these girls. Most of the time, it's just a bunch of naive girls who think, "If I get pregnant, my boyfriend will HAVE to stay with me." Then they have a kid and find out their boyfriend is a douche and then realize what a mistake they made and forget that they are a parent. Very rarely will I find a responsible teen on there.
Now, I have a few friends who got pregnant in high school and are doing very well. They are responsible. Stupid girls who think having a baby will make them look cooler and or feel more adult are STUPID AS ALL HELL! My older sister is 25 and pregnant and still feels that she might not be ready for a kid. 25! And yet 13-14 year olds think they're ready? HA!
This woman was obviously not ready to have kids then, nor is she ready to have any now. If you can't even take care of your own hygeine, how are you supposed to care for a child's? Don't be giving this speech about how I'm getting too old, I'm waiting till I am sure that my child will be loved and cared for, the way they should be in the first place.
What has this world come to?!

[Aethian]

I'm 27 and know I'm still not ready. I want one but with no stable guy to be with and my working future in question, I wouldn't do that to a kid.

[Marxfan]

I'll never be ready for kids, because at 23, I decided I didn't want them. I'm 28 now, and I still don't. I've never regretted it, and I never will. I'm not mother material.

You're wiser than most people twice your age, never forget that. That poor kid, I hope she'll survive that cretinous harridan of a mother.

[Andara Bledin]

My brother is 37 and has wanted kids since he was one. But he's worked to not have any until he's in a stable relationship and has a stable financial situation.

I seriously think that every school should have a class on what it's like to deal with a responsibility like that. The flour sack routine is a good one. Even if you cheat and leave it home alone at times, you still have to lug the thing around with you for a month and not forget it anywhere.

^-.-^

[Amina516]

Some places have the "Baby think it over" dolls which are baby dolls that cry and only the student has the key..strapped to their wrist so they cant ask anyone else for help. Lol.

I feel education IS the key, but Im sure thats best left for another conversation.

For the record, in case anyone cares, I had my son when I was 16. I matured quickly, have never depended on gov. assistance and made sure to finish high school. I have now put myself through college, have a steady job, own a home and am still continuing my education. I was able to move out @ 19 and have never been back. Only way to go is up....

Also I REFUSE to watch 16 and pregnant....ugh. That show pisses me off.

But OP, thanks for responding the way you did. That SC was a clueless of the worst kind...

[bainsidhe]

I did once have a coworker become surprised and ask why I didn't have any kids. At the time I wasn't offended because I found her shock just so...funny. Perhaps I'll have kids someday. But my life does not revolve around the idea and I love my cat.

Parenting aside, the groping would've resulted in a squeal and a smack/snarl. Do not touch me.

[sweetj82]

i had my son when i was 26 still people asked me why i waited soooo long. my son is only 5 mnths old and i am already being asked when i will have another

[tropicsgoddess]

i had my son when i was 26 still people asked me why i waited soooo long. my son is only 5 mnths old and i am already being asked when i will have another

My mom was 26 when she had me (I'm the oldest child)...hell I just turned 26 and still no kids and I'm still not ready (mostly for financial reasons). Having a kid at 26 may have been considered "late" during my parents and grandparents time, but these days it's nothing (except to some people living under a freakin' rock or stuck in 1960). As for the SC..yeeesh! I wonder how the hell that child survives if the "mom" can't even take care of herself properly.

[Plaidman]

I always wanted to have children. Our middle school did the floor routine. Mine got grabbed and thrown out the window on third story of school. Teacher belived me. But still failed me for not protecting it. "Those things are going to happen" she told me. I didn't realize that some asshole would randomly grab a baby and throw it out a window laughing maniacally. I mean, I know it has happened before, but ... whatever.

I've watched that 16 and pregnent a few times. Alot of times it pisses me off because they act so... well... dumb. I mean DUMB. Yet I'm also jealous of the boyfriends, who for most part just run off, or just shrug and act like it isn't a big deal. Its a new life. A part of you and the person you love. Someone to raise with the values that you belive in. To care for. To have a love that can never be broken. To watch grow into a person that you could be proud of, no matter what they do, (For most part ! ).

Once I get my degree and better job, I'm looking into adopting. It may not be a part of me, and that's somewhat depressing, but it still a baby I can raise.

[Sunsetsky]

I'm 25. I do want to have kids someday but my fiance and I are going to wait until we get married. Hell...we'll probably wait for almost a year after we get married before we try for a kid. Our financial situation needs improving before we can have kids anyways.

[Magpie]

i had my son when i was 26 still people asked me why i waited soooo long. my son is only 5 mnths old and i am already being asked when i will have another

Chee, my mom got told (at 27!) that she was too young.

Having a kid at 26 may have been considered "late" during my parents and grandparents time, but these days it's nothing (except to some people living under a freakin' rock or stuck in 1960).

Except for those of us who already have sub-normal fertility.

[blas]

Hasn't anyone heard the newest greatest thing is older women having babies?

I say piddle diddle doo to people who use the "your biological clock is ticking quick, my dear!" excuse when chastizing a 24 year old girl for not having children yet. Poppycock. Women have been having babies at all ages since the beginning of time. My grandma had my dad in her 40s, although he was the youngest of all her children, she was healthy, he was healthy, that's all that mattered.

True, birth defects and disease chances increase as a woman gets a little older, but women HAVE and will always be having children in their *gasp* 30s and *faints* 40s.

[Teskeria]

Once I get my degree and better job, I'm looking into adopting. It may not be a part of me, and that's somewhat depressing, but it still a baby I can raise.

But it will be part of you. Not of your blood, but of your heart. and that is so much more important. A child need to know it is loved. It needs rules and consequences that show it how to behave (and BTW show it that it is loved, you don't <usually> have rules/consequences for someone you dont care about). Being loved, knowing you matter is more important than material things.

Your child will learn proper behavior, caring and honesty from you. And will carry those lessons onward with their own children. And that's a better legacy to the world than just spawning.

[ralerin]

^ Teskeria, agreed.

I want children some day, but not now, definitely. I'm too young and irresponsible to think about bringing forth a new life when all I'm going to do is blame it for the fact I can't have fun anymore.

Ugh, the stories at work people tell about their kids and the whining they can't go out and drink and fuck anymore because of "these fucking kids", it makes me happy I've not got any.

[Sheldonrs]

I don't have kids. I don't want kids. And as long as I keep fucking guys in the ass, my chances of an un-planned pregnancy are zilch.