When Employee Incomptenece Becomes Dangerous

[Spawned]

My fiance and I are pregnant. Since we are not married, I cannot get her on to my work's insurance. Since she works for a crappy pharmacy, that might remind people of Walmart, we need to get her on state insurance for her health and our child's health. In order to complete the paperwork she needs a due date. She has already visited the W&I emergency room and the pregnancy seems normal, but she needs an actual doctor and appointment to get a due date.

Now she has been having the typical pregnancy downs, sickness and dehydration, and we are doing the best to keep her as healthy as possible. However we need to get her to a doctor, so we called to set an appointment back at the beginning of this month and we were told the earliest is Feb. 20th and we take it and I begin to look for coverage for me that day. She was advised to called the nurse line to try to get this date moved up. She tried for a week to get a hold of someone or for them to call her back.

Finally, when she did get someone, they not only could not get her an earlier date, but they had to inform her the earliest they could see her now was Mar. 1st because the other lady didn't schedule her appointment properly. WTF!?

Now I don't know what to do, since we have no coverage for her at this time we have no options on where to go. She is moderately dehydrated, and feels weak sometimes. Thanks to incompetence on a nurse's behalf the earliest we can get her in for a due date only is on the 1st and then we have to file the insurance papers before we can get her in to see an OBGYN for her health.

Thanks for nothing.

[myswtghst]

Damn. Good luck, and I wish you and your fiancee the best.

[Gurndigarn]

Consider another doctor. If you're in the US, and like we were, you can get medical bills back-paid if you qualify for Healthy Start.

In the meantime, for the dehydration, try lots of Gatorade. The powder stuff is the less-expensive and easier-to-carry way to go. Plus, naturally, lots of water.


(Been there, done that, both issues, more than once.)

[Anakah]

Well out here where I live there's an urgent care and an ER and they take you no matter what. Is it possible that there's an urgent care or ER out there that would do that for you? I mean they can't bill you later? Maybe do payments?

I think if she is getting that sick, it could be considered an emergency. It may be costly but its worth it for her and your baby's health. I was thinking maybe a family planning center could help out too. No free clinics around?

And kind of aid available in your area? I'm sure you've explored every option and I hope things go well for you.

[Cia]

That sucks. Been there also with my second pregnancy - they couldn't get me in for a month and a half.

Don't forget to find out your blood types. They will want to know for the rh Factor problem. If she's a negative and you are a positive she's going to need an rh shot.

[tollbaby]

geez. I couldn't get an appointment until ten weeks after I called (I tested positive on a dipstick when I was only 2 weeks along). Unless she's having massive problems like fainting frequently or vomiting 24/7, they likely won't consider it an emergency. Nausea, a bit of vomiting and dehydration are par for the course with early pregnancy. Quite frankly, I'm shocked that you can get an appointment that quickly, and if I were you, I'd thank my lucky stars for that. My obstetrician's standard was that as long as you didn't have any of the "emergency" problems listed above, and you weren't bleeding or cramping excessively, he didn't see you until just before your 2nd trimester.

Is she taking pregnancy multi-vitamins yet? They contain more iron than regular multis with minerals, and that might help with the "weakness" she's feeling. As long as she's getting a lot of iron into her, she won't become anemic. They're a tiny bit pricier than regular multis, but definitelyworth the price when you consider the benefits (and potential drawbacks to not taking them).

If she's unable to keep much food down, try peppermint-flavored things, or crystallized (candied) ginger to help control the nausea (peppermint tea is fantastic for morning sickness to keep liquids in you), and just have her try to eat small amounts here and there. Even a couple of crackers will help if she can keep them down.

If she's not that sick, and she's just feeling weak and dehydrated, she probably needs more iron and a lot more water. Caffeine should be entirely avoided, as well as acidic foods, which are more likely to aggravate morning sickness. (my aunt used to be a delivery and post-natal home care nurse for a group midwife practice - I picked up LOTS of information over the years, and it came in handy when I was preggers with my 8yo).

Good luck getting a quicker doctor's appointment.

[Myra]

If all you need is an appointment to give you a due date, look for a Planned Parenthood in your area. They price on a sliding scale based on income, and office visits are usually very inexpensive anyway. They can get you that due date so you can get your insurance. That's what I had to do for mine since neither mine or the husband's work provides insurance.

Now as far as the dehydration is concerned, I had some of that my first trimester also because I had such wicked bad morning sickness. Chicken brooth, water, weak tea, crackers, all these things helped. Water or gatorade is GREAT to sip on to stave off the dehydration. The weakness could be from that, and from iron problems. CANNOT stress the importance of prenatal vitamins! There are some GOOD over-the-counter brands to use until she sees a doctor. Check the ingridients - make sure there is at least 300 mg of folic acid in a daily dose. That's the recommended amount for pregnant or breastfeeding women.

As far as the doctor, sadly that's par for the course. The only reason I got in so soon when I first got pregnant is because I had some bleeding. Good gynos fill up fast! You might still call around to other OB's to see if they have anything sooner.

Hope this helps!

[FormerCallingCardRep]

I guess I was lucky with my last pregnacy (or maybe unlucky). I had my first appointment the day after I got a positive pregnacy test and since the pregnacy was extremely high risk had an appointment every other week from the beginning. I went into premature labor at 25 weeks and delivered 13 years ago today at 31.5 weeks. She is now a health teenager

[wagegoth]

I had morning (hah!) sickness my entire first pregnancy. I learned to carry ginger tea bags and peppermint tea bags in my purse. I would ask for a cup of hot water if I was eating out anywhere. The ginger was before and during the meal, the peppermint for after. They were the only things that worked.

Planned Parenthood is an excellent idea.

[Titi]

Do you need to have a doctor sign something with the due date?

If not take a couple of calendars start with the first day of your fiancee's last period and count up 40 weeks.

That's how they get the due date at the doctors office, I know because when I was pregnant with my son they had this neat circle thingy (you know where you put the question on one side and the answer will show in a slot on the other) and I asked what it was for and she told me.

So when I got pregnant with my daughter I amazed my husband by telling him the due date before the doctor. (I made some money on that one.)

Good luck.

[Gurndigarn]

Do you need to have a doctor sign something with the due date?

Yup. She's looking for government funded medical assistance. That means they need something with a doctor's signature.

Now, all the doctor is going to do is count days, but he has letters after his name, so it's Official.

[Arachne]

Try not to stress too much. Pregnancy is scary, but unless it's high-risk, the baby is gonna be a lot more durable than you'd expect. I've heard all kinds of stories of pregnant mothers "messing up" (including one woman who didn't know she was pregnant and went on a HUGE New Years drinking binge) where things turned out fine. A little dehydration and weakness is, as has been previously stated, par for the course.

I'll second whoever suggested ginger. Ginger ale (the real kind with real ginger, not the Canada Dry crap), ginger tea, ginger cookies, anything with ginger will make you a happy person. I get a LOT of nausea because of my allergies, and when it gets bad, I layer on the ginger. Ginger ale is especially good because the carbonation can sometimes help settle an icky tummy. Another good thing is plain bread or toast, nothing on it, or plain macaroni noodles or rice. Having something in your stomach paradoxically tends to make it less uggy. I don't know why this is, but there you go.

Oh, and: GET MARRIED! Even if you can't afford to do the ceremony yet, you can do a justice of the peace marriage now, get the ball rolling to get her on your health insurance before she's due (it takes a long freaking time, sometimes!) and then you can do the ceremony when you're able. Anyone who really cares about you will understand.

[Sandman]

Hell if you're in the state of Massachusetts you can get your friend to marry you. We have "one day JP" licenses.

[blas]

We have "domestic partner" type insurance now at the factory. With insurance only available with certain types of jobs and health costs sky high, something needs to be done. Why isn't anyone doing anything about it?

[BookstoreEscapee]

My cousin was sick for the entirety of all three of her pregnancies. She didn't go anywhere without a stash of saltines. Hubby got a vasectomy after #3 cuz she wasn't gonna take a chance on doing it again. Ironic part was that before #1 she was having trouble conceiving to the point that her sister was considering offering to be a surrogate for her.

Altoids makes a ginger flavored candy you might try. I get carsick if I'm not driving; I take Dramamine for long drives but sometimes shorter drives bother me so I try to keep mints or something in my bag. The ginger Altoids are a little hard to find (at least around here); I think I found them at Target; they come in a brownish gold tin.

When are you and your fiance planning on getting married? Would it be doable to get married legally and do the festivities later, so you can get her on your insurance? My friend's husband is in the Air Force reserve, and they were planning to get married in November 2002. After 9/11 his unit was put on notice and they decided to get legally married before he went anywhere, just in case, so she would have standing for any benefits and just to get information more easily. They didn't wear the rings, though (actually didn't even tell most people they were married), and did the church wedding and reception in 02 as planned.

Hope she is feeling better soon!