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Got this credit card offer in the mail.
It for this thing called the Visa Black Card. Not to be confused with AmEx Black card which is not something I'll ever be offered in my lifetime. Not that I'm really feeling a hankering for one, but I digress.
Anyway so I take a closer look because I'm curious.
First this card is apparently only issued to 1% of Americans. It didn't specify which 1% but I'm coming back to that later.
Second of all there is a $500 annual fee. What does $500 get you? Gifts! Access to airport lounges! Other stuff I've forgotten about already! A little googling and the gift is a pen and pencil set (oooooooooh!) and the airport lounges (aaaaaaaah!) can be accessed (should one feel a burning need to use one) for a fee that even I can afford.
What can't I afford? A $500 fee for a freaking Visa card.
But you know this card? Is exclusive,. It's BLACK and has real carbon it. I am not kidding. That actually said that.
OK. I could get one of those Chase Visas which you can customize with your own background picture and submit a black rectangle as my background. If I were inclined, which I'm not. So really, that's just stupid.
And the carbon thing? I was a pre-med a major. I took two semesters of organic chemistry. Even if I didn't, I think most people know that plastic is made from hydrocarbons. Which are composed of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen and other molecules. Hell, I can enjoy billions of tiny molecules of chilled hydrocarbons down at the bar, pay for it with my carbon-based plastic $0 Visa and be just as happy as some poor sucker using this $500 card.
You want to impress someone with carbon? Make sure it's a goddamn diamond.
Do they really think people are going to fall for this bullshit?
And last but not least we come back to that 1% of Americans thing. As I mentioned, it didn't specify which 1%. It certainly isn't highest income or assets, becuase I'm pretty sure I'm not that unless somebody has been paying a few billion into a secret bank account and hasn't told me about it. Maybe it was highest credit rating? Mine is good but people don't get there by throwing away money on pointless stupid shit like a $500 annual fee card.
Then it hit me. The target market is the 1% of Americans who would be impressed enough by this load of crap to spend $500 for a pen and pencil set.
And now? I'm actually kind of insulted here.
It for this thing called the Visa Black Card. Not to be confused with AmEx Black card which is not something I'll ever be offered in my lifetime. Not that I'm really feeling a hankering for one, but I digress.
Anyway so I take a closer look because I'm curious.
First this card is apparently only issued to 1% of Americans. It didn't specify which 1% but I'm coming back to that later.
Second of all there is a $500 annual fee. What does $500 get you? Gifts! Access to airport lounges! Other stuff I've forgotten about already! A little googling and the gift is a pen and pencil set (oooooooooh!) and the airport lounges (aaaaaaaah!) can be accessed (should one feel a burning need to use one) for a fee that even I can afford.
What can't I afford? A $500 fee for a freaking Visa card.
But you know this card? Is exclusive,. It's BLACK and has real carbon it. I am not kidding. That actually said that.
OK. I could get one of those Chase Visas which you can customize with your own background picture and submit a black rectangle as my background. If I were inclined, which I'm not. So really, that's just stupid.
And the carbon thing? I was a pre-med a major. I took two semesters of organic chemistry. Even if I didn't, I think most people know that plastic is made from hydrocarbons. Which are composed of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen and other molecules. Hell, I can enjoy billions of tiny molecules of chilled hydrocarbons down at the bar, pay for it with my carbon-based plastic $0 Visa and be just as happy as some poor sucker using this $500 card.
You want to impress someone with carbon? Make sure it's a goddamn diamond.
Do they really think people are going to fall for this bullshit?
And last but not least we come back to that 1% of Americans thing. As I mentioned, it didn't specify which 1%. It certainly isn't highest income or assets, becuase I'm pretty sure I'm not that unless somebody has been paying a few billion into a secret bank account and hasn't told me about it. Maybe it was highest credit rating? Mine is good but people don't get there by throwing away money on pointless stupid shit like a $500 annual fee card.
Then it hit me. The target market is the 1% of Americans who would be impressed enough by this load of crap to spend $500 for a pen and pencil set.
And now? I'm actually kind of insulted here.
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