questions people ask me

[Kittish]

Thank you for calling <nationally know red roof> pizza place <blah blah>

Do you guys sell pizza????


Unfortuneately this "question" has been asked MORE times than I care to count.

No, we sell vintage car parts. We only call ourselves a pizza place to confuse and confound people. Did it work? Great! Have a wonderful day, now. Buh-bye!

What would take the cake would be "Can you make me a virgin Rusty Nail?" (or other mixed drink where ALL the ingredients are one type of booze or another).

Or a virgin Long Island Iced Tea. "Here you go, one glass of unsweetened iced tea."

[Jay 2K Winger]

What would take the cake would be "Can you make me a virgin Rusty Nail?" (or other mixed drink where ALL the ingredients are one type of booze or another).

I could see Jester coming up with something snarky to say in response to that.

Something like, "One water, coming up."

[wolfie]

"Can you make me a virgin Shirley Temple?"

Precisely the point. She apparently thought that a Shirley Temple had alcohol in it. Specifically, she though grenadine was alcoholic. To be fair, they DO make alcoholic grenadine, but it is very much the exception, not the rule.

I've heard that some bartenders (especially at places that don't go through grenadine very fast) will put neutral grain spirits into a freshly-opened bottle as a preservative, otherwise it'll go bad before they finish the bottle.

What would take the cake would be "Can you make me a virgin Rusty Nail?" (or other mixed drink where ALL the ingredients are one type of booze or another).

A sadly common one: "I have a coupon, but I left it at the hotel. Can I still use it?"

Only if, before you order your drink, you go back to the hotel and get it.

[simplyanother]

Actually, the opposite of wild caught is farmed, not grown on trees.

Well , yes. But shrimp trees are funnier than farming them. And the fact that people would believe that there are shrimp plants will never not amuse me.

[wolfie]

"Is COKE considered a Pepsi product?"

Only when you order it with a Whopper at McDonalds.

"How many shrimp come in those 51-60 count shrimp?"

Unless it's a 1 pound package, I can see the logic. The "xx-yy count" refers to the number of shrimp per pound.

"what's wild caught mean?" (It means, they go out and catch 'em rather than grow 'em on the shrimp trees...)

Actually, the opposite of wild caught is farmed, not grown on trees.

Schrodinger shrimp!! Once it goes in the pot it's both raw and cooked! LOL

I'm sure the person who wants those is the kind of customer you want to beat half to death - with nobody watching to collapse the state vector. Either they're unharmed (and have no cause to complain) or dead (and can't complain).

Asked me if we had rubber address stamps. Yes, I answer, getting out the sample book, and then it all went bad.

Idiot Customer : Oh good, would you have one in stock then?
Me : BlinkBlink whaaaa
IC: One with my address?
Me: <with a whimper> No, the address stamps are custom made

Do you carry the "universal" stamp kits with the individual letters so the buyer can set it up for their own address?

[simplyanother]

I have like three VCR's and tons of tapes. Not sure if the VCR's still work. There's actually one near the tv right now! It's not plugged in, or connected to the tv in anyway. It's sort of visiting. and most of the tapes I have are episodes of Bob The Builder and Blue's Clues from when my oldest son and nephew were toddlers (they're 18 and 14 now..).

When I worked at the craft store, I got a call "Do you have any Wii's in stock?". "this is a craft store...?" "yeah, but do you have any Wii's in stock?", or whatever. lol

[Seanette]

Your average thrift store should have a few VCRs.

[VComps]

I was at Walmart a few days ago, and someone seriously asked a clerk in the electronics department, "Do you have any VCRs?" Gee, let me set the WABAC Machine to 1995...

While it's difficult to find JUST a VCR, Toshiba still produces DVD/VHS combo units. Just sayin'.

[Kanalah]

Do you really make all these quilts?

Do you have any more in the back?

And my personal favorite: Why does a bigger quilt cost more then a smaller one?

[Ternasthebard]

"No... this is a Betamax."

Oooo, really? Is it for sale? I need something to play my U-matics on!

[An Haddock]

I've had people walk into the shop as I have a laptop completely or partially dismantled in front of me and ask if I work on laptops.


"No... this is a Betamax."

[dalesys]

...Do you sell curtains?
*Floor*

We sell Porsche Poochies... Car pets.

[Seanette]

I had someone walk into my store yesterday and very seriously ask me if we were open.

[Trixie]

One time I had a girl ask me if she could have a page of stickers... She meant stamps.

[rapana1]

At H-Curtain Shop...

Do you sell curtains?
*Floor*