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The Tow Files: Spring into Disaster

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  • #16
    Quoth Argabarga View Post
    Well, "optional" in his case was more like "I'm only going to be 15 minutes
    I hate this excuse. It's the first excuse of lamebrains who think they are entitled to do whatever suits them today.

    "I was only there for 2 nanoseconds so you can't (tow me/give me a ticket/chastise me)."

    I love the answer I saw on Parking Wars...

    Lamebrain: "But I was only there for 2 minutes!"
    Ticketing Officer: "Well that was 2 minutes too long. The sign says 'No Parking', NOT 'No Parking except if you really want to then two minutes is OK'"

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    • #17
      Quoth Argabarga View Post
      (and you expected less from a guy who has a cellphone with an "incoming call" ringtone that's set to a semi truck "jake" brake? )
      Where can I get this?!?!?
      At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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      • #18
        Ya'll should buy 2 GoPros and stick it to whatever Ruckus is driving. I'd watch that YouTube channel .
        But the paint on me is beginning to dry
        And it's not what I wanted to be
        The weight on me
        Is Hanging on to a weary angel - Sister Hazel

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        • #19
          Quoth mhkohne View Post
          For coin guy, I'd have taken a picture of the coins (including the postage paid), printed it out as a postcard, and sent it to him with the inscription 'Mocking us cost you $3.xx. Mocking you only cost us $0.34. We win!

          Yes, there are days where I will pay small sums of money just to be a jerk.
          You should totally do that. Just add the word "extra" in front of the $3.xx

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          • #20
            Missed you, St. Arga! And please count me in as a fan of Ruckus as well as Twitch. We need more of their stories--are they interested in posting here? We could get more demented towing stories, not just the nuts you deal with... ;-)

            Wait a sec! Can we get a book collaboration with all three of you? Even if they don't collaborate, please count me in as a book-buyer! :-D

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            • #21
              This is the funniest shit I've read on this forum in months. I'm glad i started logging back in!
              If anyone breaks the three pint rule, they'll be running all night to the pisser and back.

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              • #22
                Glad I ain't the only one that loves me some Arga, stories.

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                • #23
                  Yay! I'm glad the isolation is over, reading these always gives me more joy than a dozen Springs!
                  This was one of those times where my mouth says "have a nice day" but my brain says "go step on a Lego". - RegisterAce
                  I can't make something magically appear to fulfill all your hopes and dreams. Believe me, if I could I'd be the first person I'd help. - Trixie

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                  • #24
                    Quoth Argabarga View Post
                    "So" Hubby says straightening up, "You're the one who was giving my wife a hard time?"

                    "Actually I was doing my job, she was the one who gave me a hard time by calling me names for no reason. I assume you're the one who wants to beat us all up? By the way, that's Terroristic Threats, a D Felony, you're looking at 30 days jail time if you follow through on that, but hey, I won't press charges if you won't" Rucks reaches over to the time clock and inserts his punch card "I'm off the clock, so if you want to go, lets go right now"

                    Hope he knows how to call 911 with his two remaining fingers

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                    • #25
                      Quoth panamared View Post
                      Hope he knows how to call 911 with his two remaining fingers
                      Somehow I don't see that guy being left w/2 unbroken fingers to call 911 with.

                      That thread was just what I needed (one of those "Murphy's Law" days at work.) Turns out it's even more entertaining with Ride of the Valkyries in the background.
                      Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                      • #26
                        That just made my crappy day a LOT better!

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                        • #27
                          Hubs stares at the papers, "Which one of you is driver 104?!"
                          All drivers, one at a time in "Spartacus" fashion...

                          "I'm Driver 104..."
                          "I'm Driver 104..."
                          "I'm Driver 104..."
                          "I'm Driver 104..."
                          Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

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                          • #28
                            Quoth Argabarga View Post
                            Thieves! Lowlifes! Scum! So, Discount?

                            We inform him that he's mistaken, the lot he got towed from belongs to Global Domination Reality, and you need a GDR permit to park there, which his vehicle doesn't have now, and didn't have 15 minutes ago.

                            He objects, he can park there, because, he's parked there before and never got towed, and besides, his lot, which he admits is across the street, was full.
                            The way I see it, GDR has cars without permits towed so that their customers won't find the lot full, need to park somewhere else, and get towed because they don't have a permit for the "alternate" lot.

                            As for the lot where SC is entitled to park, I can see one of 2 situations:

                            - It issues more permits than there are spaces. The "F" word applies in this case - and I don't mean either a crude term for the act of copulation, or a "sister site" for discussion of controversial topics.

                            - The lot is full because people without permits are taking up spaces. Maybe the lot owner could contract with Friendly Neighbourhood Towing to remove these "blockers", so SC would be able to find a space in the lot where he's entitled to park?

                            Quoth Argabarga View Post
                            More Crookery!

                            Finally, she gets it through her head that she's going to have to pay first, and grumbles a bit as she pulls some $20s out of her purse. Slim goes to accept them, but, at the last moment, she pulls them back.

                            "No, I don't trust you, you might steal those. I'm paying with credit card"

                            So, let me get this straight.... you refuse to pay our driver cash, tangible property that can only be possessed and used by us once...the instant you give it to us, on the grounds we might be crooks. But, you'll gladly give us your credit card, the numbers on which can, if we were to hypothetically do so, be used to buy virtually unlimited goods and services until your built-in limit is exceeded or someone at your bank notices while you may be states away blissfully unaware.... apparently THAT is perfectly fine and preferable as opposed to handing physical cash to, hypothetical crooks?

                            I don't follow that logic...
                            Perhaps you'd be able to follow this logic:

                            - SC wants car released. SC doesn't want to pay.

                            - Driver won't release car without payment.

                            - SC wants to be able to "claw back" payment. Cash doesn't have a means of doing that (short of armed robbery). Credit cards have something called a "charge-back".

                            - SC plans to call credit card company with some BS story to try to do a charge-back on the drop fee.

                            Quoth Argabarga View Post
                            An Offer we Apparently, Couldn't Refuse

                            We politely inform them that "Mr. Owner" sold his, ahem, ownership of Friendly Neighborhood Towing to "Mr. New Owner" going on 3 years ago. And, that Mr. New Owner does not consider Big Bear Road part of our service area. Note they never asked about pricing either, which leads me to believe that they thought not only would we come out there and get them unstuck, but they were probably expecting it to be a courtesy call, 100% free...

                            Might as well complain to the Carter, Bush and Reagan administrations while you're at it pal, and the Czechoslovakian Consulate, and the Commissioner of the USFL, and the CEO of Hudson Automobile. Better do it quick, or you'll miss that 3am autogyro flight to the Dutch Congo.
                            Don't take half measures - complain to the Carthiganians, the President of the Confederate States of America, and King Harold of England.
                            Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

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                            • #29
                              Yay! You're back

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                              • #30
                                I almost cheered out loud (at work!) when I saw an Argabarga post.

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