Sucktomer Random Thoughts Thread

[LadyAndreca]

SC: Where's the laminate adhesive?
Me: The paint department.
SC: No, for countertops.
Me: Yeah, I know. Paint department.
SC: NO! It should be in the cabinet aisle.
Me: You're welcome to look. The aisle's right there.
SC: It's not there! You must have another cabinet aisle!
Me: Or it could be in the paint department.
SC: DON'T YOU KNOW YOUR OWN STORE??

Yeah. I do, actually. I know perfectly well we SHOULD have it cross-merchandised in that aisle. I also know that the reason there's no laminate adhesive in that aisle is because careless forklift operators kept mangling the displays (which hang on the steel beams) beyond the point of repair and the merchandising team just gave up on ordering new ones months ago.

Paint department. Aisle 37, on the right hand side.

[Foxbite]

SC: DON'T YOU KNOW YOUR OWN STORE??

Oyyyyy what a pain!
Considering you are the one giving a specific and as-yet unchecked location to the SC, logic would dictate you know your own store!

This is like when students call to find out hours for specific rooms at the university. They get all snippy when I haven't magically memorized the different holiday hours for all 25 art rooms and google it. Then they get quiet when I ask why they don't know since they go to that room daily and it's posted?

[RealUnimportant]

Memorisation... Oy!

I get so many people that freak out when I start trying to use my terminal to answer their questions. "I don't want to buy a ticket, I just want info!" Well there's ~3000 stations in the country, with millions of possible permutations of times, routes, etc. Funnily enough, I can't remember them all so I need to look it up! And it's not like I can sell you something without getting you to pay for it, so as long as you don't "accidentally" hand me your wallet I really don't see how you might end up buying anything you don't want.

[Slave to the Phone]

I've had more than one person come up to me while I'm outside on my break wanting to ask me a quick question about their case. For some reason, they always seem surprised that I can't answer their question without looking at a computer. Sorry, dude, I just can't seem to memorize the details ofevery single case in the state. Yeah, I am just that lame.

[notalwaysright]

A few ladies today were angry because the FREE wifi was going slowly. Yeah, the FREE wifi in the store is slow and tends to disconnect randomly. The key word here is FREE. You are paying nothing, and getting discounts, so the "little spinny thing" as you put it, might take a bit longer than if you turned on your 4G. They also said that they thought "it's a conspiracy" like corporate is deliberately providing slow internet to cause people to give up on getting a coupon, and paying full price. I doubt it. Corporate just doesn't want to spend money on a faster connection.

A lady today looks at a 40% off sign and asks me "40% off, what does that mean?" I reply "it means it's 40% off." I think it was a clone of No Hope.

A guy today asks for some fabric, and as I'm measuring he says "so it's free today because it's Boxing Day, right?" and I said "huh?" and then he repeats it, and I said something lame like "I haven't heard that one before." It was the best I could do, I very nearly asked "what kind of question is that? No, it's not free, and that's not funny." Also, Boxing Day isn't a thing in this country.

[brucetiki]

Love, if you choose not to have cover for a hire car following an accident, and then you need a hire car following an accident, don't sulk at us and bitch that we provide nothing for you when we point out you chose not to have the cover...

[LadyAndreca]

"So if I open a credit card, it's an extra ten percent off, right?"

*eye twitch*

1. It was never 10% off here, it was 5%, unless you had a preapproval (which we did away with years ago).
2. We discontinued the 5% ELEVEN MONTHS AGO. It was a promotion match to our blue competitor, and corporate decided we were losing too much money.
3. I know you probably don't know that percents can't stack with percents...but I am so tired of explaining it.
4. It doesn't apply to special order merchandise anyways, just stock.
5. There is a sign ten inches from your right hand that says the current promotion is 24 Months No Interest.

So, so tired of this question.

[notalwaysright]

Second to last shift, and my CW's cutting slip doesn't fully print. She asks what to do, and her customer says, in a serious and grumpy way, "does that mean it's free?" I will admit, my face probably looked like this:

[Food Lady]

No, we don't have an email specified for nasty-grams from customers. I gave you what I had: a website. If you would've stopped yelling at me I could've told you that if you did go there and attach your email, that dept. would've been given only 48 hours to get back to you. But no, you had to fake laugh and tell me it was funny I didn't have an email to give you. I should've just given you a random one like the one for tech support. Now that would've been funny. BTW, yes, you do have to pay the settlement quote because you're in a lease. Do you not know what that is? Does anyone? I'm glad it was recorded that you want us to take you to court. Both your lawyer and ours would have to agree that it's a legally binding contract. Because it's their job to know the law.
And thanks for calling me useless. It truly shows what a jerk you are. I can tell you right now it's the complete opposite of what the rest of my customers say, which is documented on surveys.

[Slave to the Phone]

No, we don't have free wifi. Yes, I know that everywhere else does, but we are not everywhere else, we are a government office where people come to get free food and medical insurance. Everywhere else wants to attract new and returning customers. For them, free wifi is just another way of doing that, kinda like advertising and billboards. Those things cost money.

Money that is currently being spent to pay me to give you free food. Do you want free wifi at the cost of longer lines (fewer people to help), or a few less food stamps a month?

Besides, we don't need to attract customers with free wifi or advertising.

[wolfie]

If they want free wi-fi they should go to the public library.

[Slave to the Phone]

Do to the fact that I seem to be lacking proper planning skills, I ran out of cream this morning. I have a cat who expects to get a small bowl of cream when I'm making my first cup of coffee. I didn't want to die tomorrow morning, so I sent my sweetie to the mom and pop (actually mom and mom but that just doesn't have the same ring to it) store for more.

He witnessed an out of towner come raging into the store because the coin operated air pump cost money. Air should be free! What kind of customer service is this?!? The cashier/owner gave him a quarter for the pump and he just stood there staring at her for a minute and then threw it back at her and screamed at her because she was supposed to not only give him the air for free, she was supposed to air up his tire for him.

She threw him out at that point.

When hubs said something to her about grace under fire, she said it came from lots of practice.

[wolfie]

He witnessed an out of towner come raging into the store because the coin operated air pump cost money. Air should be free! What kind of customer service is this?!?

Air IS free - customer can grab as much as they want out of the atmosphere. Compressing it and supplying it through a hose which wilit a tire valve costs money. Why doesn't the customer do what I do - pay ONCE to get their own tire pump, so they can top up their tires even when they're someplace that doesn't have an air pump.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Air IS free - customer can grab as much as they want out of the atmosphere. Compressing it and supplying it through a hose which wilit a tire valve costs money. Why doesn't the customer do what I do - pay ONCE to get their own tire pump, so they can top up their tires even when they're someplace that doesn't have an air pump.

We have a free air pump, but the downside to that is that around 60% of the time, it's gonna be out of order cuz of the abuse that SCs give to it. Examples of said abuse: (Please assume that each example has happened many, many times)

1. Hose torn out by the roots cuz some twat forgot to take it off his tire.

2. Nozzle ripped off and stolen, probably to make into a crack pipe.

3. Nozzle ripped off and not stolen; brought into shop by SC invoking the "Shaggy Defence"*

4. Nozzle run over due to idiot not winding up hose after use and leaving it lying in the road.

5. Air pump totalled after dickhead crashed into it.


Cue tantrums when other customers show up and see that our air pump is, once again, out of order and they are going to have to pay a whole 50p to use the one down the road. If people are nice, we let them use our portable, but if they're ranting and raving? No chance.


* "It wasn't me!"

[wolfie]

2. Nozzle ripped off and stolen, probably to make into a crack pipe.

3. Nozzle ripped off and not stolen; brought into shop by SC invoking the "Shaggy Defence"*

4. Nozzle run over due to idiot not winding up hose after use and leaving it lying in the road.

Have you considered doing what one truck stop I stayed at did? Instead of a nozzle, they had a quick-disconnect on the end of the hose. To get the nozzle, you had to go to the fuel desk, and leave your license as a deposit.

Of course, nothing's perfect. As I was walking past to get to the restaurant, I overheard the fuel desk attendant telling someone that the nozzle had gone missing. Guy was somewhat out of sorts, since one of his tires had a leak and he NEEDED to top it up to get back to base, where the repair would be cheaper than on the road. I wound up lending him (accompanied him - didn't want to let it out of my sight) the nozzle from my emergency inflator. I don't have the "all in one" kind that you can buy at truck stops - mine is a multi-part, with the gladhand on a 6 inch pipe nipple for leverage, a few polyurethane coil hoses, and an inflator/gauge setup (all connected using quick-disconnects). Tire aired up, and he was on his way.