Ever had a "WTF moment"?

[Lace Neil Singer]

This is where a customer asks you something, and for a few minutes you go "WTF?" cuz you can't work out what the hell they're going on about. XD

I had one today when someone asked me to get them bearded ham. I had an image of a packet of ham with a ZZ Top style beard, before I realised they meant breaded ham.

[CSR Kim]

I had a woman call up and ask if we sold cups. I said "I'm not sure what you mean..." (because we're a jewelry store, so why would we sell cups?) and she said "You know, when a baby is new (her wording, not mine) you give them a cup, or little forks and spoons."

Oh, 'kay. No, we don't sell cups. And I don't think I've ever heard of that tradition either.

[TNT]

Supervisor: Difficult call?
Me: I just talked to that guy for a half an hour.
Supervisor: About what?
Me: I don't have the slightest idea.

[justZu]

I had a woman call up and ask if we sold cups. I said "I'm not sure what you mean..." (because we're a jewelry store, so why would we sell cups?) and she said "You know, when a baby is new (her wording, not mine) you give them a cup, or little forks and spoons."

Oh, 'kay. No, we don't sell cups. And I don't think I've ever heard of that tradition either.

She was probably an older lady. It used to be traditional to give sterling silver engraved gifts to a new baby(Practical, huh?). Babies back in the day could expect to recieve sterling rattles, cups, spoons, etc, usually engraved with name, birthdate weight, and such.

[CSR Kim]

Babies back in the day could expect to recieve sterling rattles, cups, spoons, etc, usually engraved with name, birthdate weight, and such.

I guess it makes a bit more sense now. I did direct her to Things Remembered, so hopefully that's something they would have.

[lordlundar]

Last Thursday. I had two customers who were conspiracy nuts. I spent 10 mins with each of them.

First one? trying to explain the difference between RFIDs and Sensor tags and why most deactivators only get one of them.

The second one was asking me about illegal activities that can be done with a computer (not that he would ever do it of course as he said 20 FREAKIN TIMES!) I almost missed my bus because of that whack job.

The only reason I can think as to why those happened was that it was a full moon that night.

[Gravekeeper]

A caller last night asked me about purchasing an "oral stove".

[Kara]

A caller last night asked me about purchasing an "oral stove".

This thread is over. You win.

I guess my most WTF moment was when I worked Video at Kroger. I brought in the movies from the drop box one day and there was a DVD copy of Jurassic Park 3. 2 things were odd about this. The description of the movie on the back of the case read like it was written by a six year old, and there was also the fact that the film wasn't scheduled to be release for another 4 months.

I had no intention of paying money to watch this movie (the first 2 were butchered enough, this time they had no well-written story to rape so it would all be gratuitous ego-stroking for Spielburg). About 2 hours later I got a call from a guy.

ME: Video department, this is Kara.
Guy: Yeah, uh, I was just wondering if uh... did you guys maybe get a movie returned, that uh, doesn't belong to you?
ME: Well, I haven't seen anything myself. I could check the Blockbuster box (people were always dropping off their movies from Blockbuster. They're lucky we were nice and sent them with the driver when he went out to deliver meds and groceries to customers). There are a few movies here, can you tell me which one is yours?
Guy: Uh.... Maybe one that, uh, shouldn't be there?
ME: Hmm, I'm not sure I know what you mean.
Guy: You know what? Never mind, I'll call back later.

I took it home and watched it (hey, a free movie is a free movie). Took it back to the store the next day and guess who called again.

Guy: So, I was wondering if you guys might have found, uh, a different movie.
ME: You know? We did get one in that I found to be very unusual, since you can't find it anywhere right now.
Guy: Oh. Uh.... is there any chance I could, uh, maybe get it back?
ME: I'll have to see if it's still here. Something like that would definitely get attention. Someone might ask questions. After all, something like piracy is a serious issue.
Guy: *Nervous cough*
ME: Oh, here it is. Yeah, I suppose you could come pick it up. I'll be here until 10 this evening. I have no problem giving it back to you, since, well it technically doesn't exist.
Guy: *Relieved sigh* Thank you.
ME: Just be more careful with things like this.

Yeah, I'm the devil.

[Boozy]

Someone at the cafe asked me what kind of kweeshee we had that day. I asked her to repeat herself several times, and she's getting madder and madder at how stupid I supposedly was. "KWEESHEE! KWEESHEE! How can you work here and not know what is on your menu?!"

Finally, after she pointed at what she wanted in the menu, it was determined that she was attempting to order QUICHE.

[Princess-Snake]

I had a customer rant and rave at me for something we didn't have. She kept on yelling at me about how we're poorly stocked, how the store down the street has it, how she'll never shop here again, and something about lawyers. This went on for 15 minutes and she left. The item which caused all this? A combination coffemaker/juicer.

[Imogene]

Someone at the cafe asked me what kind of kweeshee we had that day.

Saw it coming? *hand in the air*
Thought of a similar joke? *hand in the air again*

George Bush and Dick Cheney are sitting in a restaurant, perusing the menu. A waitress (the heroine of our story) approaches, asks for their order.
"Quickie..." George mumbles.
Waitress, unsurprisingly, falters, and asks him to repeat himself.
"I want a quickie."
Waitress storms off. Once she's out of range, Dick Cheney leans over and says, "George, it's pronounced Keesh."

The major players in the joke are unimportant, that's just how I heard it.

[Auto]

I had a woman call up and ask if we sold cups. I said "I'm not sure what you mean..." (because we're a jewelry store, so why would we sell cups?) and she said "You know, when a baby is new (her wording, not mine) you give them a cup, or little forks and spoons."

Oh, 'kay. No, we don't sell cups. And I don't think I've ever heard of that tradition either.

It's a very traditional present for a newborn, usually from the kid's grandparents. They're monogramed and often come with matching spoon/knife/fork.

I still have mine floating around in some box inthe attic.

And yeah, you order them at jewelry stores -- the better, full-service ones like tiffany's.

[meme]

Most of mine are just questions that are so stupid that you have to think really hard how to answer without implying that the asker is a complete moron. Either that, or you have to figure out what they're really asking.

I did have a lady ask if we rented hydromatic cars. WTF??? I thought she wanted one of those water cars. Apparently, hydromatic means automatic transmission.

[Lace Neil Singer]

A caller last night asked me about purchasing an "oral stove".

To cook bearded ham on maybe?

[GingerBiscuit]

I had this woman come in and ask for Kiwi.
'Kiwi?'
'Yes, the big pack of kiwi, you normally have it under the till'
'Um...'
'KIWI! The empty box isn't on the shelf!'
'COuld you show me?'
So she showed me to the shelf. She meant Kwai, a brand of garlic capsules.

Throughout the whole thing I've been thinking we don't sell kiwi's, we aren't a greengrocers.

I've also got very good at translating the various pronounciations of Glucosamine,
I've heard them all, from Glusamicine through to Cusine. And have managed to work out what they wanted every time.