Ew. Ew. Ew.

[blas]

I guess we should make it equal, because I have heard tales of my guy friends being harrassed at the bar by drunken older women..........so it can be both genders after all.

I'm sorry kibbles but I really don't see it the way you do....

[kibbles]

I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree

[GingerBiscuit]

It's not the age thing in and of itself that bothers me- I am in a relationship with a largish age gap.
I would be just as creeped out if a teenager boy did it, or a man in his twenties, or a woman- it wouldn't matter.

It's creepy and inappropriate no matter who's doing it.

If they are flattering and polite in their come-on and polite and gentlemanly when rebuffed, it'll be a lot less uncomfortable for everyone concerned.
edit- it might actually be ILLEGAL to turn down Johnny Depp covered in chocolate, just so you know.

[Crazyredhead]

I'm going to comment here that will probably get me in trouble, but, I haven't been hit on in around 10 years that I probably wouldn't know what to do, except blush. I haven't had anyone tell me that I am pretty or that I have a nice shape in so long that I would be flustered, and that he would have probably taken it the wrong way.

[GingerBiscuit]

*resists urge to make come-on*

[NightAngel]

I wouldn't care if Johnny Depp himself appeared at my door, clad in nothing but a thin film of chocolate. If he can't take no for an answer....

There would ever be a thought of saying no...?!?!?!

That's okay, Iradney. If Johnny Depp ever shows up on your doorstep naked and covered in chocolate and you don't want him- call me. I'll hop the next non-stop flight to South Africa!!!

[GingerBiscuit]

There would ever be a thought of saying no...?!?!?!

That's okay, Iradney. If Johnny Depp ever shows up on your doorstep naked and covered in chocolate and you don't want him- call me. I'll hop the next non-stop flight to South Africa!!!

Fight you for him.

This thread is now SERIOUSLY off topic.

[hotelnpa]

Creepy men

There are several men who hit on some of the female desk clerks at work. While some are just friendly flirting and stop when the woman is not interested. But some still keep on doing it.

When we check someone in, we make two room keys. This one guy said to a female desk clerk that when she handed him the keys, he said to keep the other one for when you come up.......CREEPY And it's usually the big hairy guys with a beer gut. I remember this one guy was hitting on another clerk so bad while I was starting to leave, I came back around to the desk and pretended that we were a couple. I said "Ok, honey, I'll set the trash out when I get home." He finally left and went to his room.

I know their are some creepy women out there, but the creepy guys outnumber the women greatly.

[Pedersen]

It's never been the age thing for me, it's how inappropriate it is. It is MASSIVELY inappropriate to be hitting on a stranger in their workplace. Especially in the creepy, insinuating way these guys do it.

To this, I must finally reply: Inappropriate though it may be, this is how I met my wife. Small side story:

My wife worked at The Wall at the time, around 1998. The Wall (for those who don't know) was a music store. They've since been bought up, and turned into FYE (I think that's the current owners). The Wall had something called the Buzz Club, which gave some sort of benefits, such as 10th CD free, or something like that.

Anyway, I went in to buy some CD (couldn't tell you what anymore), and she was the clerk checking me out. Offered to sign me up for the Buzz Club. I was somewhat skeptical, she wound up selling me on it, so I gave her my information. My handle here is my real life last name. Her last name is an unusual spelling, as well. She and I were just doing the normal chit chat/small talk while waiting for the computer to finish its stuff, and she mentioned IDIC and how it applied to our last names.

That was when I actually saw her. Before that, she was just another clerk, and I was just another customer. Right then, I saw her: An attractive woman who actually knew what IDIC was. I hung out for a bit longer, and tried to get her phone number, and got her email address instead (good enough for me!). I had to at least try to get to know her outside of work.

Long (LONG) story short, we got married last year, at Portage Glacier, Alaska (Cutenoob: If you're reading this, I expect you to at least know where we were! .

And all because I engaged in some highly inappropriate behavior. Would I do it again? Not to find anything more than a friend, not at this point. If I were completely unattached? In a heartbeat. I'm with the woman of my dreams, and if that's the result of such behavior, I'd try again.

Would I be pushy, though? Not to the point of invading personal space. But I would try to find a way to get to spend time with that someone away from work, until they said they weren't interested. I'd stop then.

Just an interesting counterpoint to the debate, I think. Something to be aware of, is all.

And, for those of you who don't know: IDIC is an acronym, short for "Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations", which is a summation of the Vulcan philosophy of tolerance. That's right, a Trekkie met a Trekkie through one helluva nice coincidence. And it's not a common acronym, either. It's only mentioned a dozen times (maybe two dozen) across all five series. She knew it, what it meant, and why it was worth mentioning when she looked at my last name. That's how I knew I'd found someone truly special.

That story, though, turns into a beyond epic length post. I'm not sure what's bigger than an epic, but I know the writing of that story would be it on these boards

[Jinxy]

Okay, I know a guy in his 40s (same one who has the back problems) who was one of the original Dirty Dogs and has now graduated to Dirty Old Dog. There are several key difference between a Dirty Old Dog and a Dirty Old Man that I've observed:

1) A D.O.D. doesn't use tired, corny old lines except for a laugh

2) His jokes are actually FUNNY

3) He doesn't touch without invitation, and will actually get a D.O.M. off a woman's case without hitting on her immediately after

4) Most of the time, he's just being playful

5) He know when someone's not interested in banter/flirting BEFORE he becomes annoying

6) He tips generously whether the waitress was interested or not

7) If it ends up as more than just flirting, he actually treats her like a gentleman

And to those of you thinking that ANY older guy hitting on young women is inherently creepy and wrong... If a guy his age can still catch the interest of a woman that age, then where's the issue?

I 100% agree, having worked almost 2 decades in some for or another in customer service, these are the best customers you can have sometimes, they watch your back, are always quick to make you laugh when you're having a rotten day and in general are just fun to wait on. When I was a cage cashier/pit cashier at the casino I'd have a few in their 70's who were just fun and made my day, and that was before they tipped me.

I am attracted to older men in general and taken, I think any basic flirting is a compliment and if they don't take no thanks or I'm taken then I shut them down, verbally the first time and then if I have to physically. I am a flirt and don't think there is anything wrong with flirting. I dress how I'm comfortable and frankly how I dress does not give *ANYONE* the right to touch or make comments.

Jinxy who got notice that she got the job she wanted today!!

[GingerBiscuit]

yeah, but it sounds like you were gentlemanly, and your interest is reciprocated. The problem- especially in my store- with being an SA is that you got hit on a LO and a lot of it is really unpleasant. You want your workplace to be free of it, as it can get intimidating after a bit.

[Pedersen]

Well, I don't know how gentlemanly I really was. In my entire life, I've met precisely one woman like that, and I'm now married to her. I think I knew it right away, just how special she is. And I think I was probably quite desperate (and it showed) to get some time with her that was away from work.

I guess I couldn't have been too creepy, since she did give me an email address (which, according to her, is more than she gave anybody else at the time). But, before having had that thought, I did think I probably fit the definition of creepy older guy (hey, I am 36 now).

[ContraCorriente]

I don't know what's up with old men hitting on young women. There's a guy we've nicknamed Red because of his hair color. He has a fiery mullet and always wears old, stinky jeans, boots, and a T-shirt. And he's about mid-fifties. He stops in almost every day I work and he always finds me and says, "How ya been doing today? You sure are pretty," and stuff like that. Once he told me, "I only stopped by 'cause I saw your car in the parking lot." I've gotten tired of it, and now I glare at him and give him the death stare whenever I see him. Once, I told him, "Dude, do you have nothing better to do than stop in a grocery store just to flirt with girls one-third your age?" He just looked at me and left.

[myswtghst]

Adding my 2c to the pot here.

I work on the phones, but this does not save me from being hit on. I generally don't mind it, so long as it doesn't venture into territories too personal or obscene, even though I know most of these techs are at least 10 years or more older than me. Also should be noted--I have a relatively sexy phone voice--I can't help it--I sing alto, so it just kind of comes out all nice and silky. Also, I'm widely known as the agent that the most techs are excited to meet when they come for a tour/walkthru of the call center. And now for examples...

Examples of things I'm ok with: Techs who call me hun, honey, or darling. Techs who joke around and even tease me. Techs who say I have a great phone voice/ask if I sing (I've gotten this from females as well as males).

Examples of things I'm not ok with: Proposing marriage, asking me if my other job is for a 900 number/claiming "oops! for a second there, I thought I dialed a 900 number!" Techs who tell me I have a sexy voice/my voice turns them on.

As a general rule, age doesn't bother me. It's more intent and manner--if you honestly think being sleazy will get me into bed with you, then you can walk. If you honestly think I'm cute/interesting and would like to get to know me, we can talk.

[Mighty Girl]

Was anyone else reminded of Ken Titus when reading this?

(For those of you too young to remember, once upon a time, Chris Titus had his own show named "Titus").