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  • #16
    Quoth TryNotToBeThatOne View Post
    Oh gods, don't say that! Most Brits only know Southern Americans based on Dukes of Hazzard.

    I like that show as much as the next girl but realism? Accuracy? Um, not so much.
    It could be worse.

    1.) Let's all sing it together,

    Green acres is the place for me.
    Farm livin' is the life for me.
    Land spreadin' out so far and wide
    Keep Manhattan, just give me that countryside.



    2.) Again, sing together now!!

    "Come and listen to a story about a man named Jed
    A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed,
    Then one day he was shootin at some food,
    And up through the ground came a bubblin crude.

    Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea."

    Because as we all know, oil is so plentiful in Tennesee that all you have to shoot at the ground.

    ------------------------------------------------------

    For what it's worth, everything that I know about customer service I learned from the BBC sitcom "Are you being served?".
    Just because a customer expects you to put some effort into your job, that does not make them an SC.

    Comment


    • #17
      Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
      A few stories from today.

      What did he expect him to say??

      A chav comes up to the bar. He looks about 14.

      Chav: Pint of stella please.
      Me: Can I see some I.D first?
      Chav: You don't need to. I drink in here all the time.
      Me: Well I'm a manager and this is the first time I've ever seen you.
      Chav: He knows me! We're friends!

      He points to a co-worker. Now...co-worker has just moved to the area, apart from us, he doesn't know anyone.

      CW: And you are?
      Chav: We're friends! He knows me! He'll vouch for me!
      CW: I have absolutely no idea who he is.
      I had something similar happen to me. A kid (who looked like he was barely out of middle school) comes up to my coworker D, with a case of beer. D asks for ID. Surprise, surprise, he doesn't have it. He claims he left it in his car, but he has a friend here who will vouch for him. D says that without ID, she cannot sell him the beer. The kid says he has a friend who works here that will tell her his age and he points to me. Kid says, "Yeah, we're best buddies. I've known him since we were three. He'll tell you how old I am." I walk up to him and said, "Strike One: I'm a girl. If we had been buddies since we were three, then you would have known that and called me a "she" not a "he." (By this time his face went ) Strike Two: I've never met you in my life. No wait, I think I have seen you before. Don't you get off at *street across mine* at bus #123 from *local high school* (by now his face is red.) And Strike Three: If you really do drive a car, then where the f*ck is your ID?!" He bolted.
      "But I don't want to be among mad people."
      You can't help that. We're all mad here. Every fucking one of us.

      Comment


      • #18
        I was watching some show that featured two experts, and was wondering why the one Indian lady with the British accent sounded so much smarter than the other foreign guy. Thinking it over, I realized that while growing up, the only British people I heard were on PBS - Masterpiece Theater dramas, David Attenborough, Jane Goodall, and the like. No wonder I (and probably most other Americans) think upper class British accents sound so smart! 'Course, Bertie Wooster doesn't count.

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        • #19
          The salad one made me giggle.
          "Because that's how magical meteoric size-altering space goo works." IMDB Message boards.

          Comment


          • #20
            Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
            Me: And what drink would you like?
            Customer: Salad.
            Me:

            Simple - he wanted a garden salad put in a blender with a couple of shots of vodka or the such.

            Would be a waste of vodka if you ask me.

            B
            "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."- Albert Einstein.
            I never knew how happy paint could make people until I started selling it.

            Comment


            • #21
              Waiter: Soup or Salad
              Me: Yeah Sure
              You are not alone. At least once a day, I will be making food and hear my D/T person ask "crunchy or soft?" - the response, of course, being either yes or no.

              It happens.
              "You mean you don’t have the one piece of information you actually need? Well, stick your grubby paws in the crayon box, yank one out and colour me Fucking Shocked Fuchsia." - Gravekeeper

              Comment


              • #22
                Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
                Me: And what drink would you like?
                Customer: Salad.
                Me:
                Sorry, but if you want you're Salad Tossed you'll want to go down the street about 2 blocks and hang a left, go to the third bar down on the right hand side. They should be able to Toss it for you. Just let them know if you prefer Jelly or Syrup.
                My Karma ran over your dogma.

                Comment


                • #23
                  Quoth crazylegs View Post


                  oh dear, you really have been influenced by something other than what I see.

                  See if you can find my post about the races.

                  You've never met a chav have you?


                  All my interactions with my British travelers has been fabulous. I guess that's my point of reference. You all have CORRUPTED my IMAGE.
                  "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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                  • #24
                    Quoth crazylegs View Post
                    You've never met a chav have you?
                    Alas, as far as I'm aware, the Chav disease had been quarantined to our wonderful little section of the world... they don't even have them in the rest of Europe, let alone the US.

                    And as for the idea of Brits all being refined and well spoken... spend a weekend in Wales that oughtta disillusion you fairly quickly
                    ONI HEUIR NI FEDIR

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Quoth Peppergirl View Post
                      I guess the dumb Amurhikhun in me always thinks of Brits as very refined, polite and proper.
                      Gordon Ramsey anyone?

                      I can't think of her name, but there's a show I watch sometimes on BBC America called "You are what you eat" or something like that. The nutritionist/host will just come out and say "You're fat" and she's always demanding to see people's poo. Her and Ramsey broke all stereotypes I ever had of Brits. I was shocked the first time I ever saw Gordon Ramsey. I thought Brits didn't yell . Of course now I know better.
                      "Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did."
                      George Carlin

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                      • #26
                        Quoth Hello Kitty View Post
                        I realized that while growing up, the only British people I heard were on PBS - Masterpiece Theater dramas, David Attenborough, Jane Goodall, and the like. No wonder I (and probably most other Americans) think upper class British accents sound so smart! 'Course, Bertie Wooster doesn't count.
                        Oh, c'mon. The ol' B. Wooster sounds just like a chap who could use a spot of medical education and become a cynical, hardhearted but skilled surgeon.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
                          Where are you taking me??
                          I don't even know what to say about that one.

                          Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                          oh you think you have it bad... I live in a state where the only exposure we've gotten on TV has been "Big Love"... people think you are a redneck hick and they think I have multiple wives...
                          Yeah, but it's still better than "Breaking Bad". High school teacher gets terminal diagnosis and decides to turn an RV into a mobile drug lab. Spelled "meth".

                          Quoth LifeCarnie View Post
                          Green acres is the place for me.
                          Farm livin' is the life for me.
                          Land spreadin' out so far and wide
                          Keep Manhattan, just give me that countryside.


                          "Come and listen to a story about a man named Jed
                          A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed,
                          Then one day he was shootin at some food,
                          And up through the ground came a bubblin crude.
                          Awwww....now I'm going to be singing both of those for the next three days! Thank you very much LC!

                          Quoth LifeCarnie View Post
                          For what it's worth, everything that I know about customer service I learned from the BBC sitcom "Are you being served?".
                          "Are you free?"

                          Quoth Gurndigarn View Post
                          Oh, c'mon. The ol' B. Wooster sounds just like a chap who could use a spot of medical education and become a cynical, hardhearted but skilled surgeon.
                          And losing the Brit accent somewhere along the line. (I'm also surprised that Stephen Fry hasn't shown up on the show.)
                          It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
                            Me: And what drink would you like?
                            Customer: Salad.
                            Me:

                            Maybe he's been listening to the Goon Show too much...

                            "Bartender! I'll have a glass of fish and chips!"

                            (My friend tried that line once, and he got a piece of fish and some chips served in a pint glass. Hooray for smart-arse bartenders.)

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Quoth Princess-Snake View Post
                              I walk up to him and said, "Strike One: I'm a girl. If we had been buddies since we were three, then you would have known that and called me a "she" not a "he." (By this time his face went ) Strike Two: I've never met you in my life. No wait, I think I have seen you before. Don't you get off at *street across mine* at bus #123 from *local high school* (by now his face is red.) And Strike Three: If you really do drive a car, then where the f*ck is your ID?!" He bolted.
                              Oh, brilliant! Too bad there wasn't a video camera in the vicinity to capture his moment of defeat. You'd get a zillion hits on YouTube!
                              I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
                              My LiveJournal
                              A page we can all agree with!

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                As an aside, according to fellow chef Anthony Bourdain, Gordon Ramsay's actually a cupcake.

                                Back on topic, I would have stopped the moment we were out of doors, and said 'If this sign isn't right here, then it's not ours." and I'd have then gone back in out of the rain.
                                The Case of the Missing Mandrake; A Jude Derry, Sorceress Sleuth Mystery Available on Amazon.

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