I am not honey, sweetie, babydoll!

[Anriana]

also, it seems that there are people on here that work in retail that unless you are part of their chosen and protected inner circle they don't want to communicate with you . . .so why are they working in retail?

Not everyone has the option to work at a job that perfectly suits their temperment. How many entry level jobs can you think of that don't require interaction with the general public?

[Posture Moll]

Not everyone has the option to work at a job that perfectly suits their temperment. How many entry level jobs can you think of that don't require interaction with the general public?

Indeed. Being a professional crazed hermit (my personal dream career) is not exactly financially profitable.

[Andara Bledin]

What are the other options. (I have said excuse me before and the employee just says sorry and moves, never looks up from the paper they are looking at)

That sounds like a sucky employee to me; they should at the very least give you a reason as to why they are unable to help you.

I can see where the difficulty is, in this instance. Customer says, "Excuse me," and Clerk, being preoccupied, interprets that as someone needing to get buy rather than someone needing assistance. A simple addendum of, "Could you help me, please," should be more than enough to clue Clerk in that they need to do more than just move aside.

^-.-^

[Emrld]

I understand that only job able to get at a given time, especially in today's economy could have the challange of having to interact with the public.
On the flip side of that . . .you know going in that you will have to deal with the public.
Yes, this is the correct forum for venting about this very type of situation.
I appreciate the respect that is being shown to me in educating me.

As of this moment in the topic: it is ok to say "Excuse Me" "are you available to help me?" type generic statements.


New Question:
For those of us that don't know you and don't know up front that you don't want to be called by your name by strangers - are we really that horrible that we use the name on your tag to get your attention? (again I hear you when you say it bothers you -that is not my question here) - this is not about those that make assumptions about you based on your name (ie what you like to eat etc) this is just the average person calling you by the name on your tag

also - if you have a unique name - is it ok to ask "How is your name pronounced?"

[rerant]

also - if you have a unique name - is it ok to ask "How is your name pronounced?"

It's not that it's not OK to ask, but it does get very irritating having to answer the same question about yourself all the time.

Let's say you were of a mixed race and people were always asking you (politely, not in a rude way), "What race(s) are you?"

The question isn't rude, but answering it can get very trying, and your internal answer that you're just dying to scream is, "What fucking difference does it make!?"

Because really, what difference does it make? I know people are curious by nature, but any use of logic would tell you that that person with the unique name has been asked that question eleventy times and is just so over answering it.

So really in a case like this it's not always about being rude or polite, but sheer annoyance.
I guess to get the full sense of what it's like to be annoyed with the same question over and over again you have to be one of those people who gets asked the same redundant questions.

I'm a victim of the following:
How is your name pronounced?
What nationality is your name/are you?
Are you a natural redhead?
Did that hurt?
Do you know you look like __________?

The answer to all of these questions is:

[marasbaras]

Are you a natural redhead?

Perhaps they are admiring the quality of your red hair.

Did that hurt?

Showing concern.

Do you know you look like __________?

Getting compared to a movie star is bad?

[Lace Neil Singer]

It is when you hear it over and over and over again, ad finitum. I've had people saying to me, "Huh huh it must be free!" whenever a barcode doesn't scan, and I always have to bite back an exclamation of annoyance.

As for the name thing, using a person's name suggests familiarity. Unless you know the person outside of their work, then it's never a good idea to use a cashier's or shop assistant's name, even if they do wear a name tag. Like me, they're probably forced to do so; the only concession I'm allowed is to wear a tag with just my first name on it, as I don't particularly want some SC hunting me down.

[Anriana]

Getting compared to a movie star is bad?

30 times a day? Yes. And normally it's not because you look like them - I have blue hair right now and so many people tell me "You look like Kate Winslet!" when I look NOTHING like her.

[marasbaras]

I have blue hair right now and so many people tell me "You look like Kate Winslet!" when I look NOTHING like her.

Do you look like Rei Ayanami?

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

Well you could always do the classic. "And what was your name again sir?" "William" "Hrm, that's too hard for me to remember. Mind if I just call you 'Dick'?"

M

[rerant]

Well you could always do the classic. "And what was your name again sir?" "William" "Hrm, that's too hard for me to remember. Mind if I just call you 'Dick'?"

M

I would LOVE to use that on someone. People are always trying to find short-forms for my name but it just doesn't work. My name doesn't shorten well at all and it drives me insane when people do it.
If you're a Daniel who wants to be a Dan that's fine, but I use my full name, not some hacked up version.

Getting compared to a movie star is bad?

It's annoying, yes. Especially when your coworkers go so far as changing your nametag to that of this person. And when you meet a friend of a friend and they decide they will only refer to you as Donna, and insist over and over they're going to find your Foreman.
It gets a little old.

[Emrld]

Ok - I see another difference of point of view (which it is great to have different view points)

Personally I / Emrld see using someone's name as showing them respect . . .it says I see them as an equal and I am not better than them in anyway

Lace Neil Singer used the term familiarity

this could be part of why I didn't see it as a bad, or wrong thing to use someones name . . .I have never thought of it as being familiar with a person before. On the other hand using the thought of it being familiar with someone you havent' been introduced to I can see why it wouldn't be liked.
Finally something that has made this "click" in my mind.

I say Thank you for that.

As for the question Over and Over and Over. yes, I can see how that would be annoying. Being a teachers kid . . .and teachers on the same staff still didn't know how to say my last name . . .I thought it was better to ask how to say it rather than attempt it and slaughter it.

More food for thought - in my posts I have made it clear that I am trying to see the point of view that isn't the same as mine . . .now I admit I may have missed something . . .but I don't recall anyone from the "don't formally address me" side trying to see why those of us that use names do so (and it isn't just to annoy them)
I truly appreciate those who have been respectful and patient with me wanting to try and comprehend another point of view . . .but am I the only one whom wanted to see another side?

[rerant]

I truly appreciate those who have been respectful and patient with me wanting to try and comprehend another point of view . . .but am I the only one whom wanted to see another side?

I, personally, already understand the other side, and just reading comments in this thread solidifies my understanding of why people use the first names of employees.
I just don't like it is all.

After a certain number of replies have been made it almost makes asking for clarification pointless, since the questions have likely already been answered at one point or another.

[Samaliel]

Well, my take about those who will use the names they can read from the nametags was that they just thought the nametags existed for a reason.

I don't think I would be upset by someone using my name if they read it from my nametag, but this could take me off-guard, like "Do I know them ?". If the person was being nice, I would probably shrug it off. Now, if they began to act like reading my name from my nametag made them a friend of mine, I would totally make it unquestionnably clear that they are deeply mistaken.

[Emrld]

Gosh, and in this case I kept asking for clarification and finally was able to understand another view point.
So I would say it wasn't pointless in this case.

As for you saw the other side. Good I am glad you did . . .
I guess my post came across the wrong way when you read it. It was written out of curiosity. Not an accusation. Sorry if you felt insulted or slighted in anyway.