"I Don't Work Here" megathread

[Lace Neil Singer]

It's the "are you sure?" question that bugs me the most.

[pbmods]

I left work one day still in uniform (when I was a service clerk, I was too ashamed to wear my uniform in public; once I was promoted to photo manager, I was a lot happier), and I walked down to the new store my company had recently installed. It was on the way to the train station, so I thought I'd check it out.

I really should have figured it out after the first customer asked me if we had any more milk. But, somewhat absentmindedly, I smiled at the customer and said that I didn't work at that store. I guess I got off lucky because he said, "Oh," and turned away.

Now why I didn't figure it out and take off my uniform right then, I'll never know. But I found myself standing at the photo counter schmoozing with the technician on duty, when somebody calls out from *all the way across the store* (but still in the same aisle) "You got any more milk?"

I shouted right back, with a big smile, "I'm sorry; I don't actually work at this store."

I don't know if it was the same customer, but I got the hint, and I stripped off my uniform faster than... well, a professional who strips off his uniform, I guess.... :P

Incidentally, stupid SC for shouting at me from 30 feet away. Could've walked up to me (I was standing by the entrance to the stockroom btw), and I would've referred you to an employee who *does* work at this store standing *right next to me*. But only if you make the effort first. So there!

[RebeccaOTool]

I used to get that at Blockbuster EVERY FREAKIN' TIME I went in!
Me: *Browsing Horror Titles*
SC: Where's 'Free Willy'?
Me: What?
SC: 'Free....Willy?'
Me: Sir, I don't work here.
SC: *Mutters about Smartass Teenagers*
Me: O.O

[Rapscallion]

I don't know if it was the same customer, but I got the hint, and I stripped off my uniform faster than... well, a professional who strips off his uniform, I guess.... :P

Usually done quite slowly, I understand.

Rapscallion

[Dog Welder]

The correct response in this situation is to pass her along to a balding, bearded colleague who has thick glasses and is rubbing his hands together to warm them up.

What? What? I'm allowed an easy one from time to time...

Rapscallion

No, no, no. Keep your hands cold before the fitting because then...
um, I'll shut up now.




















pointy.

[NoodleBoy]

on a few occasions when I'm in a store, I've had the ridiculous misfortune of asking another customer for help, then looking like a big dumbass.

thing is, though, I usually try to check if their clothes match what other employees of the store are wearing, and almost every time it does, with sublte differences.

I've had it happen to me, too, in a bookstore where my friend works, because there they're told to wear black unprinted shirts and blue jeans, and guess what I happen to wear alot.

[icia]

once i was in a hobby lobby when i had just gotten off work (btw, their uniforms looking NOTHING like ours). my friend and i were standing and talking when a lady walks up behind me and pokes me in the shoulder. "if you could bring yourself to stop talking with your friend, would you tell me where the large candycanes are" guess what tone she used. >> i turned around (the poke nearly did me in i don't like being touched) "i'm sorry, i don't know" i turned back around to my friend, who's just staring at this lady behind me. she raises her voice a bit "EXCUSE ME" i turn around all the way, good ol logo on my shirt, which was not hobby lobby. being a irritated myself by now i ask a very firm "What?" she turned a thousand shades of shade red "oh, you don't work here." ya think?

i think i've figured out why so many people mistake us for employees, not necessarily because we look like them (cause quite a few cases people are wearing streetclothes) but maybe it's cause we actually don't have our heads where the sun doesn't shine and we look like we know what we're doing. >>

[Canarr]

I got that once, visiting my favorite book store - I do a lot of reading, and consequently spend a lot of time in book stores. Oh, how I wish we had some of your Barnes & Nobles over here... but I digress.

One day, while looking at some new arrivals (maybe I looked like I was tidying up or whatever), a middle-aged woman approached me and asked for books from a certain author. She was polite enough, I was in no hurry and there were no actual employees in sight, so I showed her over to the section where she'd find what she was looking for. She was looking for a gift, so she didn't actually know anything about the author; I spent a good ten minutes detailing the various series available, and she ended up taking four books to the register.

About ten minutes later, the manager approached me (we'd chatted a few times, but didn't really know each other), grinned at me and said if I'd like, there was a coffee and pastry for me in their break room - since we were colleagues now. Apparently, the woman I'd helped had pointed me out to the manager and spoken well of my assistance.

[Barefootgirl]

I left the front lines of retail several years ago, but I don't think I ever left my "helpful" aura behind. There are certain shops where I can guarantee that someone will ask me for help within minutes of crossing the threshold, and they are obviously not mistaking me for a staffmember, since I am normally with my mum and pushing my three year old daughter in a shopping trolley...People also ask me for directions everywhere i go, because apparently I look like a local everywhere. This was particularly interesting when it happened in the Dominican Republic and Singapore (at least in Singapore the woman asked in English, in the DR it was in Spanish and ihadn't a clue what he was saying to me)

The Number One favourite place for this to happen is the oriental supermarket near my mum's house. Every single time I go in there, at least two people will ask me if I know where something is, or even better, if i know what something is (last time it was some weird dried fungus). My mum's theory is that I look "foreign" enough for people to assume I know what I'm buying there, but my dead posh English accent proves that I am "safe" to talk to (if only they knew!).

[Format C]

There are two times in which I was at Borders and I've been asked "Do you work here?" Both times I was wearing a shirt and a tie and I resisted the temptation to say "I am too well-dressed to be an employee." No offense if you work at Borders.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

she raises her voice a bit "EXCUSE ME" i turn around all the way, good ol logo on my shirt, which was not hobby lobby. being a irritated myself by now i ask a very firm "What?" she turned a thousand shades of shade red "oh, you don't work here." ya think?

When this sort of thing happens, you should really push the issue, I think. They should have to be mortified, and they should have their nose rubbed in the crappy way they treat others. What if you'd said something like "why are you embarassed now? I'm the same person I was when you weren't too embarassed to act like I was beneath you." She'd think twice next time, I promise that.

This exact thing happened to the husband in Best Buy. (I dont' know why he attracts them, I swear. But he really does seem to. ) He was wearing a light blue oxford (Kinko's again). Best Buy wears bright blue golf shirts.
Computer section looking at monitors. Guy next to him asks a question.

SC: So, are these compatable with blah blah?
Hubby: I really don't know about that particular machine.
SC: (nastily) Well shouldn't you?

At that point, hubby clues in to the fact the guy thinks he works there and turns to face the guy with a really nasty scowl.

SC: Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you worked here.
Hubby: My ass, you're sorry. You're only sorry because you just realized you're mouthing off to someone who DOESN'T have to take your shit.

Embarassed,the guy split. But really, why are they only embarassed by their behavior if the person isn't an employee? Their behavior would be disgusting if they did it in an empty room.

[theredbaron47]

When this sort of thing happens, you should really push the issue, I think. They should have to be mortified, and they should have their nose rubbed in the crappy way they treat others. What if you'd said something like "why are you embarassed now? I'm the same person I was when you weren't too embarassed to act like I was beneath you." She'd think twice next time, I promise that.

I couldn't have said it better myself. It is the dream-come-true for retail slaves everywhere... the opportunity to actually mouth off BACK to the SC without fear of losing your job. These SC's really need to have a dose of their own medicine. The guy your hubby mouthed back at was called out on it, and I hope he felt like a complete jerk. Maybe now he'll think twice before belittling retail employees.

[Cvstos]

When this sort of thing happens, you should really push the issue, I think. They should have to be mortified, and they should have their nose rubbed in the crappy way they treat others. What if you'd said something like "why are you embarassed now? I'm the same person I was when you weren't too embarassed to act like I was beneath you." She'd think twice next time, I promise that.

Now that is too perfect!! Next time I'm definitely using that line, and whatever else I can think of to drive the point home. Thank you!

[Greenday]

Hah, I finally got one. Might be a little weak but it still counts in my book.

I was working the other day at the racetrack(I don't actually work for the racetrack, I work for a company that rents out stand and sells food and such), when my bladder decided it was a lil full. I head to the bathroom and did my thing. I had just finished washing my hands and got some paper towel from the dispenser. Some guy was trying to figure out the complex system of getting paper towels. It's one of those dispensers that you move in front of the sensor and it gives you some. I waved my hand in front of it and he happily took the paper. He then looked at me and said, "Wow, you must work for the track!" I just looked at him oddly and said, "Um, no, I work for *insert company I work for*" He leaves and then I look at the track worker who gives out paper towel to the people at the other side of the sinks. We both had a laugh and I went back to work.

The odd thing is, the track workers shirt is a red, mine is maroon. His shirt says Monmouth Park, mine doesn't say anything. All the track workers in all the bathrooms are Mexican, I'm, well, not. Come on, just cause I know how to work a paper towel dispenser, I must work for the track? That's sad.

[Jester]

http://www.improveverywhere.com/miss...?mission_id=57

Anyone who has ever been asked if they worked somewhere they didn't will LOVE this.

Okay, I spent the last several DAYS going through that whole site, and laughed my silly little butt off. Could not believe how hilarious it was, INCLUDING the Best Buy one, despite what some people here may think. They are now my new official favorite site.