Hey, gals! You know how sucky it is to have to go to work when the Red Pony Express makes a delivery? I've dealt with it. Many times.
Well, after taking a few Ibuprofen and heading to work, I ran into these teenage guys through my line. They were buying candy, sodas, ice cream, the works. Then they start with the fratboy-esque material:
Guy 1: Hey, baby, what are you doing later?
Me: I'm gonna head home, hang out with my boyfriend.
Guy 1: Ah, that's cool, that's cool.
Guy 1 obviously looks a little down that I didn't respond to his 'invitation', so he starts trying to gross me out.
Guy 1: Dude, I took the most epic shit earlier. You ever have one like that?
Guy 2: Yeah, the kind that just makes you feel 10 pounds lighter.
Guy 1: You chicks don't know how much easier you girls have it than guys.
They start laughing and high fiving, and then I bring out the big guns:
"Gentlemen, you don't know what it's like to be gross until you've been a woman. I woke up this morning to notice my kitty had a nosebleed, that was a start. Then I had to spend my customary 20 minutes in the bathroom, not doing my hair, mind you, and quite frankly, I'm not looking forward to the rest of shark week."
The dudes start retching and going 'Awww, dude!' and run out the door. I call a manager to cancel the order and I don't tell him why I have a huge grin on my face.
Well, after taking a few Ibuprofen and heading to work, I ran into these teenage guys through my line. They were buying candy, sodas, ice cream, the works. Then they start with the fratboy-esque material:
Guy 1: Hey, baby, what are you doing later?
Me: I'm gonna head home, hang out with my boyfriend.
Guy 1: Ah, that's cool, that's cool.
Guy 1 obviously looks a little down that I didn't respond to his 'invitation', so he starts trying to gross me out.
Guy 1: Dude, I took the most epic shit earlier. You ever have one like that?
Guy 2: Yeah, the kind that just makes you feel 10 pounds lighter.
Guy 1: You chicks don't know how much easier you girls have it than guys.
They start laughing and high fiving, and then I bring out the big guns:
"Gentlemen, you don't know what it's like to be gross until you've been a woman. I woke up this morning to notice my kitty had a nosebleed, that was a start. Then I had to spend my customary 20 minutes in the bathroom, not doing my hair, mind you, and quite frankly, I'm not looking forward to the rest of shark week."
The dudes start retching and going 'Awww, dude!' and run out the door. I call a manager to cancel the order and I don't tell him why I have a huge grin on my face.
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