brides that make my head hurt

[Red Hand of Ulster]

Judges are licensed ministers.

Huh? Everything I can find about them says that they're judges, may or may not be lawyers, and are part of the court system. Nowhere does it say that they have to be ministers. In fact, that's why my parents wound up going to the JP. The Methodist minister wanted them to go to counseling for 6 months "to make sure". This after they had been dating for 6 years.

In fact, what I found for my city says that without a justice of the peace or minister officiating that the marriage isn't legal.

[lordlundar]

Or a judge. That's who my parents were married by.

Judges are licensed ministers.

[Megg]

I've picture myself married, but not really so much getting married.

And this is why, when you find the right one, you will have a long, happy marriage. It's the most important thing, and all too many forget that.

[PepperElf]

dayum. and when i get married i was just expecting Mom to pick out her own pants-suit outfit

hell after hearing about the girls and the prom dress story, i'm half tempted to have everyone just wear disney princess dresses ...

[Red Hand of Ulster]

My friend had her bridesmaids in long satin skirts in a dark periwinkle color, and simple v-neck cashmere sweaters in a lighter shade (perfect for an outdoor September wedding on the water in Rhode Island). The skirts were made by a seamstress (a friend or church member, I think, who did it cheap), the sweaters were part of their bridesmaid gift and something they can actually wear for a long time.

A former friend of mine did something similar. The ceremony was at the end of December outside in southern New Mexico. The bodice of her dress was crushed white velvet. Our dresses were all crushed velvet, but in various jewel tones and styles. She wanted us to be able to get dresses that we could wear again. I still have mine and wear it.

When you elope, that's when you get married by a JP, right?

Not quite. It's basically you, your future SO, two witnesses and a licensed minister.

Or a judge. That's who my parents were married by.

I gotta say, though I am currently single and have never been engaged or anything, I've never really pictured my wedding day when I've thought about getting married. I've picture myself married, but not really so much getting married. I have only a vague idea of what kind of dress I'd want, I don't know what colors I would have (probably blue, but who knows), where I want it, etc. I could give you a rough idea of my side of the guest list but that's about it.

Same here. All I can really tell you is that the men will be wearing kilts. Maybe Spirit of Scotland (since it's a purple and I love purple) and Black Isle (black on black) tartans? Maybe I'll use his clan? Maybe mine? Maybe we'll just take off for Grenta Green and hang it all. But first, I gotta find my Scotsman!

[BookstoreEscapee]

It amazes me the level of anal retentivness brides go to when the day itself goes so quick and the only thing the bride is (or should be) focusing on is the groom.

I gotta say, though I am currently single and have never been engaged or anything, I've never really pictured my wedding day when I've thought about getting married. I've picture myself married, but not really so much getting married. I have only a vague idea of what kind of dress I'd want, I don't know what colors I would have (probably blue, but who knows), where I want it, etc. I could give you a rough idea of my side of the guest list but that's about it.

One of my friends (she of the minister-father) chose separates for her bridesmaids. They all had the same skirt, and there were several styles of top to go with it, and each bridesmaid chose the one they liked best and felt most comfortable in. So everyone from the tiny sister-in-law to the well-endowed college roomie was happy.

[FenigDurak]

I differed a bit. I've chosen colors based on what my Mother is going to wear. I asked her to wear the blue taffeta dress she got married to my Step Father in. So she's already squared away.

[wagegoth]

I gotta know: how'd MIL and GIL take this?

MIL keeps bringing up the fact that my husband's father attended with his wife, but they live in Reno. My husband called them just as we were heading to the chapel and they showed up in the clothes they had on. They left right after the ceremony to go to work.

GIL passed away about three years later, but she got to see her first great-grandchild, so I think that took care of the disappointment.

[Megg]

If I ever become single, I'm never getting married again, but if I would I would probably do it like that.

There's always a renewal of vows or something.

Bridezillas freak me out. I hate it that they are so focused on appearances and not on what is important. That poor mother. Well, she likely did it to herself, she's the one that taught the girl, after all. Double suck, how fun!

[Calie]

That's what one of my friends did for her wedding. She had 5 bridesmaids, all very different heights, builds, coloring, etc. No one dress was going to flatter all of them. So they all wore dresses of a similar shade of dark blue, in whatever style they wanted. Everyone got to wear something that they looked and felt good in, while still matching and looking nice.

I had the same - 5 bridesmaids of remarkably different heights and shape. I picked the color and length and told them to have fun.

As for the OP, I feel sorry for the mom. It sounds like she's controlled by everyone there. Though she could do herself a favor and wear a bra...
I let my mother and future mother-in-law choose their own clothes, so much easier that way. Though my mom kept calling and asking for advice and sending pics from her cellphone...I eventually told her to go ask my sister for help.

[iradney]

So glad I'm only going to have one bridesmaid
TTO and I have already discussed what we'd like our wedding to be like (no, he hasn't proposed yet), and we're surprisingly compatible!

I take my hat off to dressmakers everywhere. Not only do you have to deal with people with unreasonable demands, I'm sure you encounter people with...hygiene issues as well.... *blegh*

[tropicsgoddess]

I'm not gonna micromanage my bridal party let alone put out any bridezilla type behavior when I get married, I detest bridezillas. I don't care as long as the MOB outfits are tasteful (and I know that both mothers-mine and SO's we can trust to pick something out that's nice) and that my bridesmaids dresses are the same color and fits them. As for the men's outfits, I'll let SO deal with that. Thank GAWD he has good taste in clothes!!!

[lordlundar]

When you elope, that's when you get married by a JP, right?

Not quite. It's basically you, your future SO, two witnesses and a licensed minister.

[Andara Bledin]

You would have loved my friends' wedding. They combined it with their Halloween party, and they and all the guests were in costumes. The guy who married them was a close friend of theirs who took an online course to become a minister, just so he could marry them, and dressed as a bright red demon. I'm not sure what the bride and groom were supposed to be, but they looked kind of like a vampire couple. If I ever become single, I'm never getting married again, but if I would I would probably do it like that. We had a blast!

Well, my first wedding was on Halloween.

The groom was in his full faire kit, as was our guild mistress, who also officiated. My brother and his girlfriend were both in matching faceless jester outfits, and my aunt was in a different sort of jester outfit, as she considered marriage a joke (hers went very sour at the end). The in-laws were in fancy old west duds, and my mother was all in black, with a really huge hat with a veil, as if in mourning.

^-.-^

[Cia]

I told my mom and MIL what my wedding colors were and they picked out their own outfits. My dad offered to wear his Navy dress whites but since my hubby, the best man and the groomsman were all wearing their Army Class Bs (green) and not their Class As (dark blue) I opted for dad to wear a black suit.