Ketchup.

[Grape The Cat]

Reading the letter from the guy who wrote to M3C about high fructose corn syrup reminded me of this dude:
Ketchup

A tale from my rest stop days:

The players:
SC: SC
Me: me
SC: That's all you are going to say to me!!

SC: Ketchup!
Me: The ketchup's right there, sir.
SC: Ketchup!
Me: The ketchup's right here sir. <points it out.>
SC: ALL YOU HAVE IS <brand> KETCHUP???
Me: Yes, sir sorry.
SC: IT HAS HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP!!
Me: ...
SC: MY KIDS'LL BE POISONED!!!! DON"T YOU CARE??!!
Me:...
SC: NO YOU DON'T CARE YOU CORPORATE SLAVE!!! YOU ARE ABUSING MY KIDS!!
ME:
SC: I'LL HAVE YOUR JOB, LOSER!! MY KIDS ARE SMARTER THAN YOU AND THEY ARE 6 & 7!!!
Me: I'm sorry??
SC: IT'S A FACT!! MY KIDS ARE GENIUSES!!!
Me: Have a good day sir.<leaves>
SC: IDIOT!!!!

Seriously, I think people have some built-up road rage when they come into the rest stop. Or they're just SCs.

[BowserKoopa1]

I would've probably came up with a witty reply like" Sorry about that stuff being in there, sir. Last I checked though, no one has died from eating it, so I'm sure your kids will live. Enjoy your meal." It didn't sound like he mentioned his kids having an allergy to the stuff, which would be perfectly understandable.
Sad part is, he probably worries about a bunch of other stuff that goes into foods. I'm surprised he doesn't complain about meat coming from dead animals, or veggies growing from the filthy ground.
It'd be really funny if the guy and then you won't hafta see him ever again.

[iradney]

..
SC: I'LL HAVE YOUR JOB, LOSER!! MY KIDS ARE SMARTER THAN YOU AND THEY ARE 6 & 7!!!

Methinks that idiot would last about 30 minutes in that job before having a breakdown...

[chainedbarista]

SC: IT HAS HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP!!

do your kids drink sodas/energy drinks/commercial chocolate milk/etc?

guess what? THEY'RE CONSUMING CORN SYRUP, MORON.

as for ketchup, most commercial brands have it; some specialty items may not, but if that's what 'sir genius' is looking for, he's in the wrong place. LERN 2 SHOP.

[Wenchie]

My friend Sarah is allergic to corn so she has to be really REALLY careful what she eats. High Fructose Corn Syrup will make her want to die, but won't actually kill her.

But does she bitch & moan about it? No. She just avoids a lot of food.

That has to be one of the worst food allergies though... corn is in EVERTHING!

[Mytical]

Then there are people like my cousin. As much as I think of him like a brother, sometimes I just have to . Swore up and down he was allergic to tomatoes. One day he is eating a sandwich with Ketchup on it. Right on the bottle of Ketchup "Made with real Tomatoes" Yeah....

Note : He never got sick or broke out or anything. Personally I think he just hated the taste of tomatoes.

Edit : Wait, I am threadjacking again ain't I? Bad Mytical.

The SC was also a EW. Sorry you had to put up with that.

[Sapphire Silk]

"fashionable ailment"?! That is a whole new level of fucked up.

Oh, yes. There's even a name for it: Munchhausen Syndrome (and it's lovely cousin, Munchhausen by Proxy). Usually they will actually MAKE themselves sick to gain sympathy.

If they don't actually get sick, then they're malingering.

Sorry Grape had to deal with that. Some people just can't live without the drama.

[Seshat]

I have family who believe I am either hypochondriac or Munchausen's.

I have doctors who can point to scans, blood readings, physiotherapy results, and other objective measures to prove each diagnosis.

I have family who doesn't care about the second fact.

[teh_blumchenkinder]

... Isn't the definition of "hypochondriac" and "Munchhausen's" you have nothing to back up how 'sick you feel'-- because whatever 'ailment' you 'have' isn't actually there!!? /ARG!
for the love of pancakes, can't people not be crazy and understand the fabric of reality at some point??
In other words, Seshat, WOW you have dumb relatives! (the ones who think that, that is)

[AyreBiskits]

are there a lot of nutritious rest stops out there? FFS he's getting food at a rest stop and he's worried about the HFCS in the ketchup?

[blas]

Sounds like my bf's mother, and to an extent, my bf......I am so tempted every day to tell them to chug that corn syrup and freaking love it.

"ZOMG, THAT HAS HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP IN IT! YESTERDAY ON THE DOCTOR'S SHOW THEY SAID THAT IS WHY SO MANY PEOPLE ARE OBESE AND IT CAUSES CAAAAAANNNNCERRR!"

[Argus]

Swore up and down he was allergic to tomatoes. One day he is eating a sandwich with Ketchup on it. Right on the bottle of Ketchup "Made with real Tomatoes" Yeah....

Note : He never got sick or broke out or anything. Personally I think he just hated the taste of tomatoes.

Or maybe processing the tomatoes into ketchup destroyed whatever substance he is allergic to. He wouldn't be the first.

[trailerparkmedic]

Raps, I'm sorry you have to deal with people like my MIL. I can't even keep her "allergies" straight anymore, especially since she decided she is allergic to beef but can eat veal. Riiiiight. Funny how she is "allergic" to anything inexpensive.

[Brojekk]

Methinks that idiot would last about 30 minutes in that job before having a breakdown...

Me thinks Iradney is right.

[Dave1982]

SC: MY KIDS'LL BE POISONED!!!! DON"T YOU CARE??!!
Me:...
SC: NO YOU DON'T CARE YOU CORPORATE SLAVE!!! YOU ARE ABUSING MY KIDS!

hmmm....no mention of the gun you were holding to their heads, forcing them to eat the ketchup that HE ASKED FOR.